My Weekend Halloween Crush

Happy almost Halloween, kittens. What are two great things that go great together? Sexy sapphic horror cinema and my favorite late 80s/early 90s alt rockers? Little did I know, when I was watching Gillian Anderson on “The X-Files” that one day R.E.M., the band that reminded us all that it’s the end of the world as we know it, would provide the soundtrack to Scully boning a lady. Hell, I even saw Radiohead open for them back in 1995 – that’s the same year Hannah Einbinder was born. Wait, is the scare here about how time works? Anyway, have a great Halloween and if you haven’t already – go watch this movie. Supernatural, superserious, wow, indeed. Happy Halloween weekend, all.

Rated Lesbian

Uh, did you know there’s a new NC-17 lesbian movie that just got picked up for U.S. distribution and also it’s an NC-17 lesbian movie? I know, I know – I too heard that and started to get some “Blue Is the Warmest Color” terror flashbacks. Like is this sexy for lesbians, or sexy for what straight men think is sexy about lesbians? I don’t know, because I haven’t watched it. But, I can tell you it follows a Canadian journalist and a queer Afghan refugee who meet at a dance party and do things that earn an NC-17 rating. I find it encouraging that at least this movie was both written and directed by women (Tamara Faith Berger and Anita Doron, respectively, though I’m not familiar with either’s work). So, has anyone rented this? And if so, is the NC-17 a good thing or, well, you know.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Comer Get Her

Some Thursdays you just have to stare at Jodie Comer in a blazer without a shirt underneath and nice trousers. What? I said it was a Thursday! On theme objectification, in a respectful way. Anyway, I miss having Jodie on my television on the regular. And, I won’t lie, I haven’t been a fan of the assortment of period pieces and zombie apocalypse films she’s been cast in recently. Like, please, can’t some project make accurate use of her prodigious talents? I mean, look at her just sitting in a chair!

p.s. That face, and those big feet? Please, I am begging, cast her in something worthy.

One Almost Lesbian Wedding and a Funeral

Remember when I manifested the Rebecca Ferguson/Greta Lee lesbian rom-com? Did I mention it got better? The film, “Honeymoon/Funeral,” just got picked up by Black Box (the studio behind “Wicker,” so they know how to market crazy shit!). And also Carrie Coon is also somehow in this thing too?

Lest you forgot, the film follows “two women (Ferguson and Lee) who meet on a flight from L.A. to London — one en route to her honeymoon by herself after being left at the altar by her girlfriend, the other headed home for her mother’s funeral — and wind up spending the week together.” We can all place bets on whether Greta is the honeymoon and Rebecca is the funeral, and if Carrie is the cold feet fiancee (as this Deadline post implies…)

But what we know if that its being directed by Nahnatchka Khan, creator of “Fresh Off the Boat,” “Don't Trust the B— in Apartment 23” and “Laid,” and written by Julia Bicknell, a writer/producer on “Yellowjackets,” “The Haunting of Bly Manor” and “13 Reasons Why.” Oh, and they’re a Hollywood power couple (with a very nice house)! I know, sapphics making a sapphic rom-com for us sapphics? Is this heaven, or lesbian Iowa? (37 year old movie reference, anyone?)

During this terrible timeline we all find ourselves trapped in, I take things to look forward to very seriously. So, don’t let me down, “Honeymoon/Funeral.” The gay ladies really need this.

My Weekend Crush

I’ve already said I don’t want to spoil the fleshly/bloody delights of “Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma” too much. But I will say that seeing Gillian Freaking Anderson be so game and glam and gay in her role was truly a wonder. I, like probably many of you, first began crushing on Gillian as the stalwart and sensible and so smart Scully. But I never, not even in my wildest dreams, could have guessed that one day Gillian would become the queer icon and out pansexual legend that she has become. Happy weekend, all.

Teenage Sex and Death At Camp Miasma Review

Well, it’s this just the perfect way to officially kick off spooky season? With lesbian horrors of perhaps the most delicious kind. I finally, finally got a chance to see “Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma” and it lived up to my already sky high expectations. Given how much I was truly thrilled by the bold. visceral storytelling of “I Saw the TV Glow,” I had been impatiently waiting. And the good news is, I loved it. And the better news is, I can’t wait to watch it again.

Gory. Gothic. Gorgeous. Gay as hell. And Gillian Anderson! What more could a gal want? Jane Schoenbrun has proven to be a filmmaker of singular and extraordinary vision. Their films weave complex allegories about society and sexuality together, shaped through the lens of nostalgia, while being both sumptuous and hilarious.

With Camp Miasma, we’re treated to the delights of watching Gillian Anderson and Hannah Einbinder be both campy and real, in equal measures. The former plays the faux slasher franchise’s original final girl turned reclusive Norma Desmond type and the latter is the young filmmaker tasked with rebooting the series. But, really, the less you know about this movie the better.

And this is coming from someone who doesn’t even like horror! But, I do love a smart, sexy, weird movie. And Camp Miasma is that, and funny, and scary, and sexy, and trippy and real. And just really damn good. Just, um, don’t be squeamish about blood. Or dipping sauces.

My Weekend Crush

Is it just me, or does Gillian give off distinctive Judd Nelson with his fist raised at the end of “The Breakfast Club” vibes here or what? I think it’s the plaid/trench/attitude combo. It’s giving sexy 80s movie boyfriend feelings. Truly, is Gillian Anderson in 2026 not just the most exquisite vindication for thinking Scully was a total smokeshow from the start back in 1993? (Yes, even with those bangs.) Anyway, I hope “Camp Miasma” (sorry, I’m tired “Teenage Sex and Death at…” is a lot to type) does bonkers box office this weekend. Like, this is the genderqueer sapphic slasher fantasy of our wildest dreams, how could it not be? Happy weekend, all.

My Weekend Crush

Um, did we manifest the new Rebecca Ferguson/Greta Lee sapphic rom-com or what? Between her heavy wlw flirting and her tank top supremacy, Rebecca has apparently been method acting her way to her new lesbian role. Also, how did we not know about her new lesbian role – with Greta Lee no less – before this?

The only whisper of it was Greta’s Interview magazine chit-chat with Willem Dafoe earlier this month where they had this exchange:

LEE: I’m about to leave on Saturday to do something in London. I’m scared to do it.
DAFOE: That’s good. What is it?
LEE: It’s a romance, but it’s between two women, and I haven’t done that before.
DAFOE: What kind of romance? Full on?
LEE: Full on, baby. I’m doing my stretches.

And then the Internet gods gifted us with these shots of them being all kissy-kissy in London together on set. I guess not everything in the world is terrible. May we all survive long enough to see Rebecca and Greta “full-on” lezzing out for each other on screen. We expect so little from you these days, universe, please let the sapphics at least have this. We promise to do our stretches, too. Happy weekend all.

The Like Is Out There

[Click to embiggen]

Even if I end up not loving “Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma” (and I highly, highly doubt it), I will always love how horny Gillian Anderson and Hannan Einbinder have been for each other during the press tour. Like, just out there, putting panties around our necks, calling out Jean Smart and now thirstily liking vintage pictures of the other. I mean, I get it. I liked that picture, too. Never change, ladies, never change. Happy Hump Day, indeed.

p.s. Can we talk about the way Gillian looks like the perfect 50s housewife clinging to her secret gay younger lover? Yes, I broke out the “L” word and not about Lover Cindi.

Girls Trip

Stoner comedies aren’t typically my favorite genre. But stoner comedies directed and starring queer female leads and talking cats? Spark that shit now! Let’s fucking go! I have no idea whether “The Wrong Girls,” starring Kristen Stewart and Alia Shawkat and written and directed by K-Stew’s wife Dylan Meyer will be any good. But I know I don’t care because, well, did I mention the talking cats? Also Kate McKinnon is also in this thing. We’re all going, just bring plenty of snacks for the munchies.

p.s. Also here is K-Stew working out in a tank top-adjacent attire for this movie in case you needed some Tuesday bona fides.

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Short Lesbians

Did you know you can watch Maya Hawke and Victoria Pedretti be gay together for 18 minutes? Yeah, neither did. But thankfully The Lesbian Internet graciously alerted me to this fact. The actors appear in the short film “The Non-Actor,” which is available to stream now on Mubi – whatever that is.

The short follows Elliot (Pedretti) who is staying with her ex’s new girlfriend Bella (Hawke) while attending a medical trial for her recent, unexplained loss of hearing. Per Letterboxd: “As she reconfigures her relationship with her (sonic) environment and herself, an intimate connection sparks between the two women.”

That spark better include smoochies is all I’m saying. So, does anyone subscribe to Mubi? Is it worth the $14.99(!) a month? Or, more likely, activating the 7-day free trial? Inquiring lesbian minds need to know. So far, I like the unsolicited knee pat. But, yeah, imma need some smoochies to make giving another site all my contact information seem worth it.

High Art Redux

Last month, “High Art” was added to the Criterion Collection. The 1998 indie was the debut feature from Lisa Cholodenko, who would go a dozen years later to make some lesbians very, very upset about the also excellent “The Kids Are All Right” (and, yes, I still stand by that assessment, now another 16 years after that – whew, time is crazy). Now, I haven’t rewatched “High Art” in a decade, possibly two. But I remember how viscerally I felt this movie, with its arty intensity and grungy tragedy. Also, Ally Sheedy was obviously a revelation after only knowing her from her 80s brat pack days. I wonder now, much older and possibly a little wiser, if I would feel the same way about “High Art.” Guess I have to pick up the Criterion edition to find out. Also, what happened to Radha Mitchell? I definitely had a little crush on her. I mean, remember “Love & Other Catastrophes?” Gosh, I wonder if that’s available anywhere? Anyone up for a 90s lezzy movie marathon? Deep cuts only.

Bound Again

Speaking of OGs returning just in time for Pride, did you hear about that “Bound” 30th anniversary reunion earlier this month? Let’s pretend none of us heard the whole it’s been 30 years since “Bound” came out part and instead celebrate Jennifer Tilly and Gina Gershon and Lilly Wachowski and some of the fellas from the movie (men, they always have to tag along) showing up to talk lesbian sex and queer subtext. It reminded me that there’s apparently an uncensored European cut of the movie. European kittens, please, help a gal out. Drop a non-geoblocked link in the chat, you know, for charity.

My Weekend Crush

You don’t often see media about older queer women that isn’t cloaked in tragedy. Granted, there aren’t enough non-tragic stories about queer women of any age – period. Bury Your Gays is real, and relentlessly hard to kick. But for older women-loving-women, so many stories revolve around the lack of acceptance, or death of a partner, or generational miscommunication. Or, you know, falling off a ladder while trying to fix a birdhouse. (Yes, I am still traumatized by “If These Walls Could Talk 2,” why do you ask?)

So imagine my delight when I stumbled on this little short, about an older woman who seeks the advice of her younger queer coworker on how to flirt with women. It’s just 10 minutes, but feels like a little gem. As a single woman getting older herself (oh, time, and its relentlessness), I can deeply relate. But mostly, I appreciate this story for bringing back those little gay butterflies, when a queer story simply lets its subjects find joy in each other. We all deserve that, no matter what age. Happy weekend, all.

Girls Like Movies About Girls Liking Girls

What can’t Lesbian Jesus do? Sing a song about girls liking girls. Make a video for your song about girls liking girls. Write a book about your video for your song about girls liking girls. Write and direct a movie about your book based on your video for your song about girls liking girls. And then cast a little doppelganger for yourself in the movie about your book based on your video for your song about girls liking girls. Truly, what can't Hayley Kiyoko do? I know I’m not really in the age bracket for this movie anymore, but I appreciate the get-up-and-make-it-gay-yourself of it all. Way to get it done, Lesbian Jesus.

My Weekend Crush

Finally, a movie that teases possible sapphic content that I’m fairly confident won’t disappoint me with just a bunch of queerbaiting. Thanks for kinda nothing, “Mother Mary,” Verity,” “Her Private Hell” et al. But “Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma,” from everything I’ve read since its premiere at Cannes, is the real deal. And the final trailer and poster seem to emphasize that point. Also, and this is not a spoiler, just a wild guess and hopeful projection, don’t Gillian and Hannah look like the ultimate sapphic Final Girls in that poster? Make it so, Jane Schoenbrun! I loved their “I Saw the TV Glow” with such an unexpected passion, I can’t help but have the highest of hopes for Miasma. And, as all you kittens already know, I don’t even like horror movies. But between this cast who I feel equally confident in saying have both kissed women in real life and storyteller’s singularly universal use of trans allegories, yeah, bring on all the Little Deaths, whichever kind they may be. Ahem. Happy weekend, all.

Sitting Courtside

Speaking of the WNBGAY, two of the league’s out stars have signed on to a new sapphic sports film “Courtside,” which has some other very familiar faces the camera as well. Abbot Elementary writer/producer Brittani Nichols and Autostraddle-alum Carly Usdin are writing and directing the film which “follows an injury-plagued women’s hoops superstar whose championship ambitions are upended when she falls for her teammate.”

Real-life out WNBA stars Gabby Williams of the Golden State Valkyries and Sydney Colson of the Indiana Fever and recent WNBA player Theresa Plaisance (last with the Seattle Storm in 2023) have all signed on to play, and I’m wildly guessing here, fellow WNBA stars.

But Colson isn’t just appearing, she’s also an executive producer. And guess what new production company is behind all this love and lesbian basketball? Run-A-Muck which was co-founded by, drum roll please, Ilene Chaiken and Jennifer Beals. Yes, that Ilene Chaiken and that Jennifer Beals of “The L Word” fame and infamy.

It’s actually heartening that two of the women behind the seminal lesbian TV series are still making stories for queer women. And, with the pedigree behind it, I have outrageously high hoops, I mean hopes. (I had too, apologies.).

As Brittani told Deadline:

“It feels like I’ve been waiting my whole life for this kind of excitement to surround women’s basketball, and I’m excited to blend my love of sports, lesbian tension, and comedy into one project,”

Add this to the happily growing list of upcoming sapphic sports stories vying to become queer women’s “Heated Rivalry," including the “Slo Pitch” and “Ripe!” and (maybe) “Cleat Cute.” I say, why have one “Heated Rivalry” when we could have at least one for each sport – softball, soccer and now basketball. Who’s got next? Looking at you, women’s rugby stories.

Historically Stupid Men, Always Men

Everything is so stupid (and, of course, scary) all the time these days. But can we all just have a deep, endless belly laugh about the World’s Richest Man crashing out so spectacularly about a 3,000-year-old epic poem? He can’t shut the fuck up about how the casting of Lupita Nyong’o as Helen of Troy in “The Odyssey” is “ahistorical.” My dude, it’s a mythological story. There’s also a cyclops, a six-headed serpent and vessel-devouring whirlpool monster. Are you also gonna complain that the vessel-devouring whirlpool monster is anatomically inaccurate?

But then, why would we expect anything less from the World’s Most Racist Serial Killer (I mean, he killed USAID, which is killing…*stares in ebola crisis*). He’s mad about Elliot Page being cast as (maybe Achilles, maybe not Achilles, really anything) in the movie as well because why just be a Nazi when you can also be a transphobic piece of shit? Anyway, I’m going to see Christopher Nolan’s next opus, not because I’m a homer for Homer. But because it will make Elon crash out even more if it does well at the box office. And these days, it’s the little things that get you through.

p.s. Like how attractive is this female cast? All their faces could launch a thousand ships – and more. So Stay mad, Musky! Stay mad.

Tank Top Tuesday: Feeling Ripe

Sports bras, as we all know, count as tank tops. Also, did we know Kelley O’Hara was also developing a sapphic soccer story for the big screen based a little on her own life/famous World Cup winning smooch? Like I knew about “Cleat Cute,” though I’m not sure where that project is now since the end of Megan and Sue. But “Ripe!”? Yeah, somehow I missed it. Maybe because the name is, how do I put this, terrible. I mean, I get it. But also kinda hmmm. But teasers about the film featuring its star, “The Summer I Turned Pretty” lead Lola Tung are certainly leaning into the whole ripeness of it all. According to Them, the movie, based on a Spanish short film, will follow an American exchange who falls for another female soccer player while playing overseas. But all I know is things are about to get sweaty.

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Hell Is Other Sapphics?

Right, so apparently Sophie Thatcher and Havana Rose Liu play former lovers in this. You couldn’t guess it from this teaser, but then you really can’t guess anything from this teaser except that Charles Melton has great pecs. But, per Deadline, the plot of “Her Private Hell,” follows an actress named Elle (played by Sophie, teenage Nat of “Yellowjackets” fame) working on a new movie who reunites with Dominique (played by Havana Rose of “Bottoms” fame), who happens to be her former lover but is now married to her father. Which, ew.

There’s also some sort of urban legend and/or myth and/or hallucination about a The Leather Man who drags young women to Hell. And/or it could just be a real serial killer. Anyway, Deadline goes on to call the movie, which premiered in Cannes out of competition, pretentious. But possibly in a good way? I dunno. I just know we’d better get some payoff for all these movies (looking at you, “Mother Mary”) that feature fraught relationships between former female lovers. Otherwise, no matter how pretentious, what’s the damn lesbian point?