Music Monday: Dance Like Everyone Is Watching

Look, I know this is not necessarily gay. But it’s Robyn and David Byrne. So, like, come on. Watching them sing together on the SNL 50th anniversary concert special earlier this month cracked something inside my chest. It made me smile. It made me cry a little. But, it wasn’t necessarily a bad cry. It was more of a release. The discordance of this truly dark national moment paired with the uninhibited joy of creativity. I hope you feel the same kind of release watching these two weirdo genius legends dance with abandon and take us all for an exhilarating spin. Joy, particularly LGB-and especially-TQ+ joy, is an act of rebellion. Don’t ever forget that. Happy Monday, kittens.

Music Monday: Pride Song

Last week of Pride, y’all. Have you danced on a Deutsche Bank float yet? Hope not! See, now hilarious, topical, entirely accurate skits like this are only possibly because queer people were actually part of the process. I will forever be thankful to Kate McKinnon, Bowen Yang and Punkie Johnson making “It’s Pride Again” the Pride banger it was, is and will always be. Happy last Monday of Pride, kittens.

Own Kind of Wednesday Weirdness

As long as I’m sharing SNL stuff this week, how about this skit from late last year that made me literally LOL because of how very much Emma Stone goes for it. The intentional weirdness yet unwavering accuracy of Emma’s every move here. As a person who at times can spent an ungoddessly amount of time disassociating from the universe on TikTok, I can say this is exactly how poor Mama Cass’s “Make Your Own Kind of Music” has been embraced by pop culture today. Anyway, if you, like me, have hardcore hit the Dreaded January Doldrums, I hope Emma’s wiliness to go full feral and commit to this bit brighten your day a bit more.

Good Rapp

OK, fine. FINE! I get it, I finally get it. I – in a mostly age-appropriate way – get the whole Renee Rapp thing now. Yes, again, she is a young youth. But I see why the Gen. Z gay girlies go wild now. Because, like that whole bikini as top/little cropped jacket thing, made me almost swallow my own tongue. In a respectful(ish) way! Right, anyway, I feel like her SNL musical debut was a real cross-generational moment of understanding among queer women. I mean, who could resist this “little lesbian intern” energy? Also, we see (and love) you O.G. Regina George/Rachel McAdams. How about a “Disobedience 2”? Just a thought.

And, of course, Megan Thee Stallion’s cameo certainly helped. Also, oh to be a lesbian fly on the wall when Megan, Renee and Cara Delevingne got to whatever super Sapphic after party they were cleared all headed to together here – respectfully.

Music Monday: ABBA-solutely Hilarious

OK, OK. One last guaranteed mood lifter from this past holiday season. Truly, if you don’t at very least giggle at Kate McKinnon, Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph and Bowen Yang trying not to break while singing ABBA into each other’s faces you may need to seek medical help. Also, this album is a great option for belated Christmas gifts for those mothers and/or their gay sons you forgot about in December. Happy Monday, kittens.

Purrfect Pairing

You know what else helps those January Doldrums? Gay Cat Ladies, duh. In case you missed it amid the holiday hustle and bustle, here is Kate McKinnon and Billie Eilish as the latest Whiskers R We cat rescue workers/long-lost mother-daughter. And, obviously, the apple and fashion sense and sexual orientation doesn’t fall far from the tree. Favorite Outfit: Embroidered floral T-shirts! Favorite movie: “Tar” starring Lydia Tar! Celeb Crush: Mariska Hargitay! Yep, they’re Mother-Daughter Gay…played by actual gays. You love to see it.

Home on the Farm

Look, I knew Kate McKinnon returning to SNL for the first time to host would be good. I did not expect it would be Lesbian Tampon Farmers good. But how can you resist when it brings us Kate McEthridge (see what I did there?) together with Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph and Billie Eilish as fellow tampon farmers (also I see you, Paula Pell, getting in on the lesbian jokes). From the acoustic guitars to the muscle shirts, it’s a gay folk singer chef’s kiss. Kate’s SNL was also the queer female comic equivalent of those get you a gal who can do both memes. From Crunchy Granola Dyke to Marlene Dietrich stan. What can’t Kate do?

The Great Plaza

I can’t think of the last time I liked an entire episode of “Saturday Night Live” from start to finish. But thanks to the delightfully weird energy of host Aubrey Plaza, last weekend was the weekend. I watched the first new SNL of the new year because I’m still a Riley stan, but with admittedly low expectations. But thanks to Aubrey’s hosting and some better writing, I enjoyed the whole thing from first skit to last. And I think that’s because having a more diverse and inclusive cast and writers room matters. The new cast now includes the first non-binary cast member in the show’s history in comic Molly Kearney joined by out LGBTQ+ castmates Bowen Yang and Punkie Johnson. To wit, Aubrey's episode was gay as hell, but not in a way that necessarily makes fun of LGBTQ+ people to punch down. Instead, one of the skits was specifically about how ridiculous homophobia is — particularly the strain of “no homo” bro culture. I mean, yeah, that was something that even a decade ago I don’t think you would have seen on America’s premiere sketch comedy show. This is a show where for decades having two straight actors kiss was a guaranteed laugh line. So, you know, change is good. So here’s a look at the gayest sketches from last weekend’s show. Aubrey, who is out and bi, of course makes them all gay. But that’s besides the point.

Two butch Arizona lesbians skypeople posing as Na’vi in basketball shorts and tanks? Look, if I can invest nearly three hours of my life watching a bunch of straight elongated Smurfs, the rest of the world can enjoy some blue Hundred-Footers from the American Southwest for a change. Amiright?

We all know cis gay boy circuit party culture is the ripest of LGBTQ+ cultures for parody. And we all know gay men really do love unhinged plastic women. Those are just facts, hunty.

And, finally, even the preview for last week’s episode were super gay what with Aubrey and Chloe Fineman making out because, honestly, everyone just wants to watch Aubrey Plaza make out with women. That’s another fact, you lil homos.

Live, From New York, It’s Them!

Live, from New York, it’s SNL’s first nonbinary cast member! Nonbinary comic Molly Kearney was named one of four new cast members joining the show in the wake of last season’s exodus. (Oh, Kate, Kate — you were always too good for the show. But you were definitely the best thing about those 10 seasons, McKinnon. And you too, Ady.).

But, back to Molly or as they calls themselves on Instagram, meatbrickmolly. Besides being the first nonbinary cast member in the show’s 48 season history, Molly is also the first “A League of their Own” cast member to join SNL. Yes, as if things weren’t queer enough, Molly is a freaking Rockford Peach on the first season of ALOTO. And if those gay credentials weren’t enough, I think all signs point to them being fully ensconced on Team Rainbow.

Like this.

Or this.

Or that.

And definitely this.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Molly 🙋Kearney (@meatbrickmolly)

So, congrats Molly on joining the cast. May you be a worthy successor to the McKinnon legacy and break even more ground in the process.

p.s. Thanks for spotting my very unfortunate pronoun mistakes. Fixed with my sincere apologies. Sometimes you mess up.

Say What You Want To Say

http://dorothy-snarker.tumblr.com/post/115834408730/source-pro-gay

Great use of this song or greatest use of this song?

Tina Fey Tuesday

Yes, yes, I realize I’m starting to sound like a broken record. Tina Fey = Tina Awesome. Lather, rinse, repeat. But today I’m all about sharing the Tina love with other hilarious women. You see, Vanity Fair finally rebutted its own beyond insulting essay from January 2007, “Why Women Aren’t Funny.” Whatever you do, don’t read it without blood pressure medication on hand. A year and three months later, the magazine has finally responded to its own outrageous claim with an Annie Leibovitz lensed cover story titled “Who Says Women Aren’t Funny?” Assembled, along with Tina, are some of the hottest (both career-wise and looks-wise, as the article pointedly observes) female comics around. God, there’s not much sexier than a smart, funny woman, is there? Also, how much do I love Amy Poehler copping a feel on the cover? Nice.Now, I really don’t know where this whole “women aren’t funny” bullshit came from. In fact growing up, I didn’t even realize this was a stereotype. I mean, I’d heard about the humorless feminists and uptight schoolmarm types. But all of womankind? None of us are funny? I guess I was just raised in one of those sheltered environment where my parents and friends told me that a woman could be anything she wanted to be, including funny.For a more thorough analysis of the article, check out AfterEllen later today. But for now, can we please just enjoy women being funny with other women? Seriously, I’ve got to Weekend Crush like six of these women immediately.


p.s. How does one become a faux boob tattoo appliquér because this is a job I think I could really excel at?

UPDATE: See the hotness and hilarity in glorious hi-res over at Popbytes.

Ladies’ Month

This one is, as they say, for the ladies. Yes, we’ve officially entered Women’s History Month. Wow, a whole month devoted to sugar and spice and everything nice. To celebrate, I bring you three fantastic videos featuring us dames. We are your rock stars, feminist icons, your potential lesbians, yearning to breathe free. And, yes, we totally kick ass.

Jem is truly, truly, truly Le Tigre-tastic.

Outrageous? No. Awesome? Yes.

No, my first name ain’t baby.

Let’s all make a vow to eat constantly, kick ass and look good. (Don’t let Coulter scare you away, it’s so worth the click.)

And I was like, aaahhhhhhh!

Oh, that Ellen Page. What a fun and positive way to poke back at all the gay speculation swirling around her of late. And, seriously, why does everything have to have a frickin’ label? Why can’t we all just hug a woman with our legs in friendship? In fact, in honor of Ladies’ Month, I think I’m going to go do that right now.

Tina Fey Tuesday

Where my bitches at? Oh, come on, you knew that was coming. Tina Fey’s triumphant return to “Saturday Night Live” this past weekend featured the most bitchin’ feminist rants on the show since, well, since Amy Poehler berated today’s starlets for not having lady gardens anymore. In a genius and succinct stint at the Weekend Update desk, Tina both presented and shot down all the trite arguments against voting for Hillary Clinton.

On post-feminism: “Women today feel perfectly free to make whatever choice Oprah tells them to.” On a co-presidency: “Because that would be terrible, having two intelligent, qualified people working together to solve problems. Ewwh. Why would you let Starsky talk to Hutch?” On not wanting to see an old lady: “Really, they didn’t seem to mind when Ronald Reagan did that.” And, best of all, on the bitch thing: “Yeah, she is. And so am I. And so is this one. You know what? Bitches get stuff done.”

I have it on good authority [hat tip, Lex!] that during rehearsals Tina got her groove thing on between skits with cast members. Oh, to see Tina shake her money maker live. I’m going to need to take a moment. Also, apparently, one of the jokes cut from her Weekend Update bit involved a transgender male-to-female woman who has been hassled on the subway. Tina said the woman was suing the MTA for harassment because she was called “a dyke instead of her proper name, Ms. Fey.”

While the rest of the show was a tad hit-and-miss, Tina’s presence gave the series its strongest rating in two years, not to mention the strong female voice it so often lacks. The monologue? Adorable. The Annuale commercial? Well, the Annuale commercial needs to be seen to be believed. Just hold onto your fucking hat.

God, I could not love her more. I mean it. It’s not even remotely possible. I always knew Tina would be a Hillary backer. And, as Scribe suggested yesterday, I say we hold a special election to crown Tina Queen of the Fucking Universe. Bitch is the new black! Join the movement. Us bitches got to stick together.

p.s. Does anyone else think Tina made this final shot specifically for us, her lesbian fans? I mean, she knows we’re out there. And she is wearing her famous bi-curious shoes. Intentional or not, a grateful nation universe of gay ladies thanks you, Tina Fey. See what I was saying about that Queen of the Fucking Universe thing? Bitches in ’08!

[Hat tip, Tina Fey Daily for the SNL promo card caps!]

Ladies, you need to cool it...

After all this talk about fake skit comedy shows, the real deal pulls through. Last weekend, SNL's Amy Poehler had her say about stars flashing their business all over town. Lady garden, snicker.

UPDATE: The clip is dead, please enjoy this partial transcript. Lady garden gets me every single time.

Speaking of Britney Spears, I’d just like to take a minute to address this latest trend: flashing your business while coming and/or leaving a limousine. Ladies, you need to cool it. Nobody wants to see your baby factory…What’s next? Shots of stars pooping out of a window?

And lastly, ladies, what’s up with all the deforestation going on down there? You need hair down there! It’s a backup system for underwear! Even when you’re showing it, you’re not really showing it! There was a time when a lady garden was as big as a slice of New York pizza. Then it turned into an upside down John Waters mustache!