Music Monday: The Beautiful America

I couldn’t get it together in time to articulate My Weekend Crush this past weekend. I needed the extra days to fully digest what had happened last Tuesday. To allow the relief and jubilation at our democracy overcoming everything those fascist bastards threw at us finally sink in. We appear to be at the beginning of the end of MAGA. We The People finally rose up.

It’s been six years since I’ve felt good after an election night. Fourteen years since I felt great after an election night. And 18 years since I felt ecstatic after an election night. And boy howdy, did we need this. We needed to be reminded that America, for all its flaws, can still set itself right at the ballot box. We can still strive to be those better angels.

Have we fixed everything and can we all go home now? Of course not. So far from it. But this at least gives us a chance to get started on the hard work ahead.

We can fight some other day about how and what and when. But I at least hope that we can all agree the new Democratic leadership needs to do everything in its power to help the people – to make people’s everyday lives a little better, a little easier, a little kinder. And we can’t do that without ensuring that the people who have worked every day these last two (and before that four) years to instead make their lives worse, harder and crueler face consequences. Either we live in a nation of laws or we don't. Otherwise, history has shown us (again and again) that inhumanity and corruption will only come back stronger.

What I especially love about this blunami is that we did by embracing our multiculturalism as one of our greatest strengths – the exact opposite of the administration’s uber racist anit-DEI crusade. The historic firsts among our newly minted leaders should make any true patriot’s heart swell.

• The First Black Female Governor of any state (Keisha Lance Bottoms, Georgia)
• First Native American Female Governor of any state (Deb Haaland, New Mexico)
• The First Latina Governor of Texas (Gina Hinojosa, Texas)
• First Latin Governor of California (Xavier Beccera, California)
• First Native American Female Senator (Peggy Flanagan, Minnesota)
• First Muslim Senator (Abdul El-Sayed, Michigan)
• First Out Gay Man Elected Senator (Chris Pappas, New Hampshire)

I could go on and on. (Also, huzzah to all the new queer and trans lawmakers elected at every level. Now that’s how you fight this administration’s hate head on.) Anytime more people get to see themselves reflected and represented in the halls of power, it strengthens the bonds that make us all Americans.

The road ahead to not only fix what has been intentionally broken but forge a better, more equitable path will be arduous. There are no guarantees. These victories will be short-lived if Democrats and progressives can’t find ways to tangibly improve people’s lives. (Or at the very least force that Orange Stain to veto things that would tangibly improve people’s lives.)

But, really, what I wanted to say is thank you, America. We are far from perfect. We still have so much injustice and inequality. But I hope 2026 has reminded us who we actually are or at very least aspire to be – big-hearted decent people who at our core believe in everyone’s right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Oh, America. You beauty. Happy Monday, kittens.

p.s. Also, let’s be shallow. We had to see all the straight progressive women (and gays) drooling over all 2026 Democratic Class Beefcakes. But the ladies? *low whistle* Talk about the opposite of MAGA-face. Hello, Ladies’s Night.

Not Choosin' Texas

So, now that MAGA is officially on the descent instead of ascent, maybe I can start watching this shows. Because you know all these women vote Republican. (Fine, maybe not Brittany Snow’s character, but she definitely fucks a Republican…) Truly the whole genre of rich obnoxious people getting in fights over dinner is not my favorite (hence I’ve never watched a Real Housewife ever because, ew) – even if they engage in super hot looking sexytimes together. Anyway, anyone want to make a supercut of Margo and Sophie and any woman wearing a tank top so I don’t have to sit through the Texas of it all? I’d be much obliged, little darlings.

Nina Says

Mood.

Vote, Vote Against the Dying of the Light

Once more, with feeling – in case anyone didn’t hear them clearly enough yesterday. Get out there and VOTE, America. Vote because all the issues raised by The Chicks in this six year old song have ONLY GOTTEN WORSE. There are now more names to add to the endless scroll of those lost to state and authoritarian violence. There are now overtly racist (and corrupt and deeply stupid, just as a fun bonus) people manning every lever of our federal government. But there are still more of us than them. And we need to use our collective power to send a message no one can deny. March your ass to the polls, make them pay for the daily horrors they inflict on this country and the world. Democracy depends on you. Let’s fucking go!

Music Monday: Stay Mad, Vote Mad

I’ve never been much of a contemporary country fan. But, darn it, if the Chicks aren’t on my bucket list now. Like, I just want to go to a concert to feel the cathartic release of an entire stadium screaming, “I’m not ready to make nice!” and that they’re “mad as hell!” Funny how 20 years ago their comments were about an idiotic president starting a needless and costly war in the Middle East. And today it's deja vu all over again, but with more overt racism and endless corruption. Please, everyone who hates all of *waves arms at the world*, fucking vote. And together we can never let the Republicans win another election again. Democracy depends on us, the mad as hell. So let's go not make nice at the polls. Good luck tomorrow, America. Happy Monday, kittens.

My Weekend Halloween Crush

Happy almost Halloween, kittens. What are two great things that go great together? Sexy sapphic horror cinema and my favorite late 80s/early 90s alt rockers? Little did I know, when I was watching Gillian Anderson on “The X-Files” that one day R.E.M., the band that reminded us all that it’s the end of the world as we know it, would provide the soundtrack to Scully boning a lady. Hell, I even saw Radiohead open for them back in 1995 – that’s the same year Hannah Einbinder was born. Wait, is the scare here about how time works? Anyway, have a great Halloween and if you haven’t already – go watch this movie. Supernatural, superserious, wow, indeed. Happy Halloween weekend, all.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Just Suits

It’s the Thursday before one of the most consequential elections of our lifetimes. (Like, will we continue having a democracy after Tuesday? Guess we’ll all find out together!) So of course I’m stress scrolling through women in beautiful suits and menswear. You cope your way, I cope mine! If you’re able, please vote to make the world just a little bit better in five days. May this be the beginning of the very end of MAGA. And may that Orange Turd finally know how many of us hate him with every fiber of our bodies. Anyway, as I was saying – nice fiber, great suits. Mariska doesn't hurt either.

Melissa King

Eat your heart out, Jeffrey Zakarian

Louisa Jacobson

Who knew one day I’d squint at a phot and ask, “Is that the hot masc youngest daughter of Meryl Streep or a late 90s boy band member?

Padma Lakshmi

Are BIG suits still a thing, or is it just Padma making it still a thing?

Kristen Wiig

Wait, are blazers without tops a thing now?

Sepideh Moafi

See, almost a trend! Also Gigi deserved a better storyline than the throuple.

MUNA

See, even the rock stars are doing it.

Nicole Kidman

I know she’s having a bit of a moment what with that song and all. And in that crisp shirt, they’re definitely sitting right. Ahem.

Anne Hathaway

The no jacket here gets a pass because doesn’t she look like a gender-flipped Clark Gable about to devastated some woman by telling her, frankly my dear, I don’t doesn’t give a damn.

Rated Lesbian

Uh, did you know there’s a new NC-17 lesbian movie that just got picked up for U.S. distribution and also it’s an NC-17 lesbian movie? I know, I know – I too heard that and started to get some “Blue Is the Warmest Color” terror flashbacks. Like is this sexy for lesbians, or sexy for what straight men think is sexy about lesbians? I don’t know, because I haven’t watched it. But, I can tell you it follows a Canadian journalist and a queer Afghan refugee who meet at a dance party and do things that earn an NC-17 rating. I find it encouraging that at least this movie was both written and directed by women (Tamara Faith Berger and Anita Doron, respectively, though I’m not familiar with either’s work). So, has anyone rented this? And if so, is the NC-17 a good thing or, well, you know.

Tank Top Tuesday: The Queer Cheese

I first found Kate Berlant years ago on original Twitter (not current ex-Twitter, because jesusfuckingchrist) as a person who made funny tweets. But turns out she’s been a professional funny person this whole time?! And also queer?! What? Where have I been?

Did you know she’s dating queer nonbinary hottie Naomi McPherson from MUNA? I mean, she’s freaking dating a rock star! And then I watched her special, and it’s pretty hilarious. And extremely gay! And also hilarious. I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect, again, because I knew her mostly as a professionally funny tweeter. Think scatalogical modern observational comedy from a fellow phone addict in a new queer relationship. I mean, hello, what’s not to like? Crazy funny plus dating a rock star. Wait, am I jealous? Wait, the special is also named Parmesan? She named it after CHEESE? I am definitely jealous.

p.s. Filming your comedy special debut in a tank top is elite queer shit, no?

Music Monday: More Labour

Of the things I remain eternally grateful for, one of the biggest is that I was not born a straight woman. But then things like mediocre man comic Shane Gillis being a misogynistic asshat mediocre white man hosting SNL happens, and I’m reminded that men continue to be everyone’s problem. So Paris Paloma’s “Labour” still hits on a deep, primal level for women and those subject to the demands of men everywhere – particularly rich straight white men because Issa was so right. So, anyway, a little female rage seems appropriate this week and every week. Happy Monday, kittens.

My Weekend Crush

Well, I never said I wouldn’t eventually make it to Nigella, did I? I know for some reason it’s been controversial that new “Great British Bake-Off/Great British Baking Show” judge Nigella Lawson takes big bites of food. As if the whole point of her job isn’t eating cake. You think she can taste it with a tiny little nibble? I’m sorry, women need to open their mouths to eat. Crazy! What next, they’ll wear shorts and a tank top to the gym? Also, hello, Nigella’s whole thing is that she’s a great and lusty eater. Know your history, Internets! Anyway, take as big a bite as you want, ladies and everyone who doesn’t have when ladies take big bites. Happy weekend, all.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Comer Get Her

Some Thursdays you just have to stare at Jodie Comer in a blazer without a shirt underneath and nice trousers. What? I said it was a Thursday! On theme objectification, in a respectful way. Anyway, I miss having Jodie on my television on the regular. And, I won’t lie, I haven’t been a fan of the assortment of period pieces and zombie apocalypse films she’s been cast in recently. Like, please, can’t some project make accurate use of her prodigious talents? I mean, look at her just sitting in a chair!

p.s. That face, and those big feet? Please, I am begging, cast her in something worthy.

Dream Duo

Um, hello, are Jane Wickline and Grace Reiter the love children of Tina Fey/Amy Poehler and Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer or what? If SNL lets them, I believe we’re witnessing the start of an extraordinary comedy duo. Like, this skit has no right to be this funny. Put them in all the things together, Lorne Michaels. Also, what a debut for new cast member Grace. Like, that is how you make an entrance. That is as good as Jane's Sabrina Carpenter song, but that wasn't her first skit. This is exactly the unhinged female energy we need and deserve in 2026.

Tank Top Tuesday: Flash Lesbian Dance

Yes, yes, I know this is an ad. But do you want to watch Jennifer Beals dance around with another women for a minute and a half or not? This commercial for the collaboration between GANNI (which I’ve never heard of) and lululemon (which I have heard of but I wear old T-shirts to work out in so I’m clearly not their customer base) features music and dancing by METTE. Now, admittedly, I also don’t know who she is. But apparently she had roles in “The Old Guard,” “Hustlers,” “Cats” and the “Barbie” movie – all films I watched. But I can see why Bette, I mean Jennifer, found her memorable enough to break out the old Flashdance moves. So, as I was saying, enjoy this moment of capitalistic sapphic pandering. Times are hard, we’ll take what we can get. Also Jennifer’s sport bra at the beginning and METTE’s fake-out-leotard count in the Tank Top Cinematic Universe, because it is a Tuesday after all.

p.s. More behind-the-scenes Tank Top Cinematic Universe excellence. For science.

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