Gender Fuck Thursday: Tie Me Up Edition

Who doesn’t love to tie one on? A necktie, people, a necktie. Sheesh, bunch of drunks here. As a kid, I loved ties. My father rarely wore them, so when he did we knew it was a special occasion. That, of course, led to their mystique. I had a few hand-me downs my dad gave me to play dress up with. In fact, one of my favorite things to do was to wear one of my dad’s old 60s Lord & Taylor suit jackets (slim-cut, so they almost fit), slick my hair back and put on a tie. Geez, and you wonder why it took me forever to figure out The Gay. I haven’t worn one in a while. But with lovely ladies like Katharine Hepburn as inspiration, perhaps it’s time to give it another try. Now, who wants to show me how to tie a Windsor knot again?

Ellen PageI looked a little like her swimming in my suits back in the day.

Gillian AndersonShe looks a little like she is auditioning for “The Office.” Oooh, maybe she can be the new Michael Scott.

Hilary SwankGod, she makes a handsome boy, doesn’t she?

Janelle MonaeIt is one of my greatest wishes that Janelle will help usher in a trend of women in beautifully cut tuxedos.

Kirsten DunstTaking ties off can be as fun as putting them on. Sometimes more.

Emma ThompsonI believe the word you’re looking for here is rawwwr.
[Hat tip, babsf!]

Clara BowThe It Girl in a tie and suspenders. Now we know what “It” was.

Ingrid BergmanIngrid in that tie is totally worth more than a hill of beans.

Marlene DietrichNo Gender Fuck Thursday is truly complete without her. Period.

Vacation Vixen: Hilary Swank

Just in case you needed any help sticking to that resolution. Happy New Year, all.

Ready for our close up, Mr. DeMille

Let’s face it, the box office can be boys town. The summer blockbuster season is always problematic, what with its things that go boom and bang and bust. But Oscar season isn’t always kind to the ladies either. Last year, only one of the Best Picture nominees – “The Reader” – centered around a female lead (and she was used largely in flashbacks/forwards). When the serious business of making serious films comes up, it’s usually films about serious men doing serious things that get all the attention. Hell, this year there is even a film called “A Serious Man.” No, I’m not kidding.

The thing is, Oscar-nominated films with virtually no women in them (think “No Country for Old Men,” “Saving Private Ryan,” “There Will Be Blood,” “The Shawshank Redemption,” “The Departed”) are so common that no one gives them a second thought. But think back to the films that featured almost no men that have been nominated. It’s really hard, isn’t it? Looking back 40 years I could only really find one: “The Hours.” Sure, it had men in it but they were relatively minor characters. Wow.

But this year, with any luck, some strong women will break through and remind us that even in the movies, a woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. A look at the female-fronted films coming up this season that, for the most part, seem to pass the Bechdel Rule. We are women, hear us chomp on popcorn.

Amelia (opens Friday)

Go find another Oscar dress, Hilary. You’re going to need it.

Precious (opens limited Nov. 6)

This film will probably break my heart, but with any luck by the time it’s over it will lift it up as well.

Women in Trouble (opens limited Nov. 13)

Ten women and one day. Works for me.

The Lovely Bones (opens Dec. 11)

This book was quietly riveting. If the movie is even half as good (and somehow improves on the unfortunate “Ghost” ending), I’ll be riveted again.

Nine (opens Dec. 25)

Fellini sure loved the ladies. And what lovely ladies they are. Let’s hope some of them get to actually talk to one another about something other than his fictional doppelganger.

It’s Complicated (opens Dec. 25)

This one may not end up passing Bechdel’s rule, but – come on – it’s Meryl Streep.

So, any of these catch your eye? Or any I missed? Oh, and see you at the multiplex.

Dog day afternoon

Doggone it, you knew this was coming. After a day of nothing but cat calls, I’ve had to let the dogs out (yes, forgive me, I went there). I had dogs all while growing up. In fact, until I got a cat I considered myself strictly a dog person. So I know that special, unspoken bond between a girl and her dog. Sure, dogs may be man’s best friend, but they’re a woman’s best friend forever. Who’s a good dog? Who is? Who is?

Kate Moennig & FloydVenus Williams & HaroldKatee Sackhoff & MeatballHilary Swank & Karu & friendsLisa Edelstein & Wolf EAmy Adams & Pippy & SadieZooey and Emily Deschanel & KatrinaEllen Page & Patti (*yes, named after Smith)Christiane Amanpour & her newshoundJordana Brewster & one lucky puppyAli Larter & two really, really lucky puppiesGlenn Close & her blogging puppies Jake & BillDid you know Scribegrrrl is practically BFFs with Glenn and her pups? Well, now you do.

Tank Top Tuesday

Coming off a long, lazy three-day weekend, I have to admit that I’m just not ready for the formality of business attire. So, I’m not gonna even try. Instead, let’s revel in the casual charm of the tank top. I mean, look at Keira Knightley. Does she look even remotely interested in going into the office? Whether working out, working hard or hardly working, it’s simply the best way to ease into any work week – abbreviated or not. Thanks, ladies, for reminding us that the tank top is always the preferred attire when…

…running errands, like Hilary Swank.Of course, she is taking that “running” part a little too literally. Overachiever.

…walking the dogs, like Olivia Wilde.Never before have I meant it more sincerely when I’ve said, “Lucky dogs!”

…walking a dog and a baby, like Jessical Biel.Sheesh, another overachiever.

…checking your cell, like Evangeline Lilly.If only it had GPS, this whole “Lost” thing could have been over a whole lot quicker.

…rubbing in your ability to sunbath to your undead boyfriend, like Anna Paquin.Does anyone else have to fight the urge to scream “SOOKEH!” whenever you see her?

…considering just how hot it will be to co-star with Eliza Dushku, like Summer Glau.Joss Whedon is a total babe magnet.

…relaxing before killing Bill, like Uma Thurman & Zoe Bell.Behold the beauty of always having a spare.

…arm wrestling, like Rose McGowan & Rosario Dawson.Clearly they’re wrestling to see who has to take a shower first. I call it a draw and say they shower together. Compromise is truly a beautiful thing.

Puttin’ on the Ritz

Nothing classes up a joint like a top hat. It's Monday, heaven only knows how many cups of coffee you've had. Parts of your body (and I'm not saying which parts, I'm classy like that) are still sore from the weekend. So watch these ladies pull something soothing out of their hats for you. Now if only they were all wearing tuxes and tails, too.

Reese WitherspoonNaomi WattsDita Von TeeseNicole KidmanLiv TylerHilary Swank

So, got a favorite? I must admit, no one wears a top hat like Marlene wears a top hat. Le Sigh.