Wednesdays, amirite?

Well, shit. It’s been another week. Some life shit has thrown my off-keel (not to overshare, but The Ex is moving in with The New Girlfriend). Add that to some health issues (again, not to overshare but some carpal tunnel and hypermobility issues in my hands and the continued menace of perimenopause) means I am just not feeling it right now. But I want to feel it again, I’m just trying to figure out the best way back to feeling less topsy-turvy. The ground keeps shifting, but the sun keeps rising. So, I guess, onward. I swear I’ll get back to posting hot women doing hot things soon. Until then, please enjoy my current favorite moody song on everyone’s existential crisis playlists.

Music Monday: Rapp Edition

I, honestly, am too old to know much about Reneé Rapp other than that the twentysomething and under gay girlies absolutely adore her. I never started watching “The Sex Lives of College Girls” (see: too old) and I am not enough of a musical theater queer to know her from “Mean Girls” on Broadway (never a theater gay in high school, alas). But my TikTok feed occasionally feeds me Gen Z baby dyke celebrity crush content and bisexual actor-singer/singer-actor Reneé is not infrequently being fawned over in them. So, like, I get it. She’s got some Charlize Theron’s little sister who did show choir energy — which I respect. I also enjoy that talking about her new music video is a bit like queer lady Mad Libs. It would go something like this: Bisexual performer Reneé Rapp releases a video for her single “Pretty Girls” which is about kissing pretty girls and was directed by real-life queer celebrity Shane/Cara Delevingne and features Reneé making out with her slightly shorter haired doppelganger. Anyway, having too many pretty girls to make out with and not enough time sounds like a problem I am honestly too old for. Probably. Happy Monday, kittens.

My Weekend (Re-Canceled) Crush

By now you’ve probably heard the collective “Fuck this!” launched by queer women everywhere at the news that Amazon has canceled, or I should say re-canceled, the second season of “A League of Their Own.” The queer and diverse reboot of the 1992 women’s baseball classic didn’t even warrant a final four episodes as promised. Instead the cancellation is yet another reminder that billionaire-led corporations don’t really give a shit about inclusive storytelling, lifting up marginalized performers and showcasing diverse voices.

Oh, and trying to blame the ongoing writers’ and actors’ strikes on the cancellation? Yeah, nah to that utter bullshit. We want the people who create and appear in the stories we love with all of our hearts to get paid fairly, you see. They create the value in the entertainment we enjoy, and they deserve a fair cut of the record profits, streaming and viewership their creativity and hard work bring into our lives. We decidedly are not rooting for the Bezos or Zaslavs and Sarandoses of this world to buy themselves more superyachts.

The ongoing Cancel Your Gays trend is a reminder that so-called rainbow capitalism is still just plain-old capitalism. They’ll court us as long as they think our queer dollars will help them profit. But as soon as things get even a little more complicated, goodbye fair-weather corporate allies. (e.g. Bud Light, Target, et al).

The importance of true allies and the essential need to be represented fairly are as critical as ever given our current political climate. There’s a reason conservatives and corporations fight so hard against including us in history or schools. Our very existence continues to be a revolution against the entrenched structures they cling to for power. And they are more than happy to whip up the easily convinced crazies at the expense of our community and everyone who supports us. That includes LGBTQ+ ally and shop owner Lauri Carleton who was fatally shot by a man criticizing the rainbow flag outside her store this week. Don’t tell me the anti-gay laws and anti-gay rhetoric don’t kill. It just keeps killing.

As sadly resigned as we all are now to the table scraps that these massive media companies continue to feed us when it comes to inclusive LGBTQ+ entertainment (but you got one whole season, why aren’t you full yet?), I am still forever grateful for the big-hearted, full-swinging storytelling of Abbi Jacobson and Will Graham and the entire cast and crew of the ALOTO series. Just like we have always been a part of history, LGBTQ+ and POC players have always been a part of baseball. The world needs more stories that bring home the simple fact that our world is more beautiful when we all get a chance to love and shine exactly as we are. Happy weekend, all.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Keke Edition

Talk about making all of your lesbian R&B music video fantasies come true. Thank you Keke and Usher, who with their “Boyfriend” music video gave the world and petulant tech billionaires everywhere a lesson on true trolling and queer gals everywhere even more reasons to swoon (fine, the straight ladies/gay boys can swoon about Usher too). In case you don’t keep up with the latest celebrity tea and assorted other hot beverages, back in July Keke’s then boyfriend criticized her because of a video of Usher serenading her at his residency in Vegas. Like he really said, “It’s the outfit tho.. You a mom.”

Anyway, that’s why he is her ex-boyfriend. If you want more schadenfreude you’re welcome to Google the whole sorted saga yourself. But, in the ultimate clapback, Keke has now teamed with Usher for his music video to “Boyfriend” which… like, again, chef’s kiss for trolling. And lesbian chef’s kiss for R&B fantasy wish fulfilment. Like Kee dressed exactly as Usher doing all his moves and being fine as hell in the process? Yes, pleases and thank yous.

Keke, who has repeatedly reaffirmed her own queerness, thanked Usher for casting her in the video and making her own dreams of being Usher in an Usher video come true. This is such an endlessly relatable statement for queer women everywhere, who no doubt at some point in their lives wished they could be in the place of the leading man they were watching on screen and make the women swoon for them instead.

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Like, if Keke Palmer serenaded me in Vegas wearing that Usher outfit, yeah. She would be definite boyfriend material.

Race to the Bottoms

In an alternate universe where the heads of studios and streamers understood the irreplaceable contributions that the writers and actors provide to a process that has made a lucky few like them and their fellow CEOs obscenely wealthy already and actually paid the creative class fairly instead of trying to replace them with machines, we would no doubt all be delighting in the press tour antics of Rachel Sennott and Ayo Edebiri as they promoted “Bottoms.” But instead, we’ve only got their work in the trailer and clips to try to glean every last queer drop of publicity and enjoyment we can from. Which, that being said, is still considerable. I recently, finally, watched Rachel in “Shiva Baby,” but have yet to start “The Bear” (though I’ve enjoyed Ayo in “Abbott Elementary"). So I know the talent involved is considerable. I just hope that a pair of teenage lesbian losers who start a female fight club in their high school to meet girls is a comedy and satire concept the wider world can recognize and embrace without, you know, some charming press tour antics to grease the endlessly hungry maw of our social media attention span. Yes, I am talking in long sentences without pause for some reason right now, don’t question, just admire my literary breath control. *gasps*

Anyway, to get those not normally inclined to maybe attend a female-led queer comedy, it apparently also stars former NFL running back Marshawn Lynch. Go see this movie this weekend if you can because, well, gay stuff…and sportsball stuff. Go Team (and that team is Gay).

Fucking Tuesday

Hey, so guess what, I’m having a bit of a week (my work bestie put in her two week notice the same day I came back to work from vacation and I haven’t been on track since, and other life blergh.) So let’s all share a primal Bette scream into the void and hope that “Fuck” carries to the outer edges of our universe and takes all of our last fucks with it. Reset, start again tomorrow. Promise.

Music Monday: Tiny MUNA, Big FOMO

I don’t often have FOMO, but goodness do I have Lesbian FOMO about this. As a forever lover of sad, sensitive (as well as fun and bouncy) lesbian music, I am rainbow-colored with envy about queer supergroup trio boygenius’s upcoming debut at Madison Square Garden in NYC. I mean, that alone would be awesome. But they’re bringing Muna, MUNA!, with them to open. I mean, can you imagine this crowd? An absolute sea of shes, thems and theys queering it up together in the queerest way possible. Yeah, major Lesbian FOMO. I guess I’ll just have to console myself with Muna’s recent Tiny Desk concert. I was lucky enough to see them open for my first post-COVID concert (the wonderful Kacey Musgraves) and immediately fell in love with their live shows. Anyway, if anyone has a spare ticket (and, uh, spare plane ticket and spare hotel room…) to MSG in NYC on Oct. 2, your friendly neighborhood lesbian blogging community member would love to be your +1. You know, as a suggestion. Anyway, enjoy tiny concert FOMO and happy Monday, kittens.

My Weekend Crush

Well, I’m back from vacation, but am I back back? Yeah, not really. But I am back enough to recommend a documentary I watched over my break that will remind you how important it is to share LGBTQ+ history through the ages. Honestly, stories like “Nelly & Nadine” are one of the reasons the Right Wing fascists fights so hard to censor what is taught in our schools. Because if you teach people about the genuine love, bravery and talent of everyday LGBTQ+ people, it will be so much harder for them to get people to hate us. And then who could they scapegoat to win elections?

Pretty much anyone who watches the love story between Nelly Mousset-Vos, who was a celebrated mezzo soprano, and Nadine Hwang, who ran a well-known LGBTQ+ literary salon in Paris, during World War II would never approve of a “Don’t Say Gay” bill or banning books that acknowledge our existence. The two women met when both were imprisoned in the Ravensbrück concentration camp in Germany. The story goes, Nelly was singing to the other prisoners on Christmas Eve 1944 when a voice in the crowd asked for a song from “Madame Butterfly.” That voice belonged to Nadine, who was born to a Chinese diplomat father and Belgian mother. Both Nelly and Nadine were in the camps as “political prisoners” for being part of the resistance (but I am certain being gay didn’t help, either). So they were also a real-life pair of fruity war heroes, so take that DeSantis.

It was in that most desperate place that the women fell in love and started a relationship that would last for the rest of their days. Their love story is told through the eyes of one of Nelly’s granddaughters, as she discovers her grandmother’s history when she finally goes through the boxes filled with personal diaries and archival footage that was left to her several decades ago. Told in a mix of Swedish, French and a tiny bit of English, the documentary is an intimate glimpse of queer life and joy well before the LGBTQ+ rights movement started in earnest with Stonewall.

In fact, the home films Nadine took are a reminder that we have always been a part of society, it’s just that society used to demand we keep ourselves hidden away behind closed closet doors. Now, much to the Right Wing’s continued chagrin, more and more of us have abandoned the closet altogether and refuse to hide in fear. They really hate that.

While watching I found myself getting greedy and wishing the documentary had used even more archival footage, because those glimpses were so real and alive. The women had been separated during the war with Nelly shipped to another camp. After both were liberated, they found each other again and lived the rest of their lives together in Venezuela. Their home movies show they found good gay friends there who became part of their chosen families and vibrant inner circle.

The other thing the documentary does is remind straight people how easily they’ve overlooked us queers throughout history. Nelly’s grandchildren never realized the nice older hapa woman who was their grandma “roommate” was actually her romantic and life partner. Which, oh straight people.

Honestly, if I had the money I would option the rights to Nelly and Nadine’s story, because love stories don’t get much more epic — gay or straight. I would love to watch that movie, but at very least folks should check out their documentary on Prime Video. We have always been here. You just had to notice and care. Happy weekend, all.

Vacation Vixen: Natasha & Clea

Can’t stop, won’t stop with the 90s nostalgia. I am remember buying this Out magazine with Natasha Lyonne and Clea DuVall on it back in 1999. Honestly, “But I’m a Cheerleader” would make a great double feature with the Barbie movie. Pink Squared.

Vacation Vixen: Tatiana Maslany

As much as I thought “She Hulk” was fun and funny, goodness do they not need to hide Tatiana’s talent under all that green GCI.

Vacation Vixen: Nicole Ari Parker

They’re doing a much better job of making “And Just Like That…” fun, watchable and less awkwardly inclusive in its second season, they really have. And even if Nicole’s character is aggressively heterosexual, I know deep down she’s still that girl driving the white Range Rover who didn’t know how to put air in her tires and got swept off her feet by Randy Dean. Also, please note the day and the tank top.

Vacation Vixen: Ariana DeBose

I would like to get Anne and Ariana together in a Lip Sync Battle. Because I think the strength of their combined Theater Kid Energy could fuel the world

Vacation Vixen: Michelle Pfeiffer

If we’re throwing it back to the 90s, can you believe it was 31 years ago that Michelle cracked that whip? Talk about a core lesbian memory. Me-ow.

Vacation Vixen: Cate & Gwyn

Welcome to Throwback Thursday. I figure if everything 90s is hot again, why not Cate Blanchett & Gwyneth Paltrow circa the 1999 Oscars. Who would have thought almost a quarter century later Cate would be considered one of our greatest living actresses and Gwyn would run a company that sells candles that smell like her vagina.

Vacation Vixen: Stephanie Hsu

I saw “Joy Ride” before I left on vacation and when you combine Stephanie’s performances in it and her Oscar-nominated work in “EEAAO,” well, that is an actress who can make you laugh and cry and laugh again. And looks great in a suit. Give her her own movie, now!

Vacation Vixen: Anne Hathaway

Anne and Michaela Coel’s fashion designer/rock star lesbian lovers movie “Mother Mary” got a waiver to continue filming during the strike because its indie studio A24 agreed to all the WGA/ SAG-AFTRA contract conditions. The lesbian movie gods are union strong, obviously. And in a tank top, no less.

Vacation Vixen: America Ferrera

It is literally insane that America rose to fame on a show that called her ugly. INSANE. Also, her “impossible to be a woman” monologue from “Barbie" is a battle cry for whole new generation.

Vacation Vixen: Forever Sinead

I’m just still thinking about her. I hope, somewhere, she is at peace.

Vacation Vixen: Janelle Monae

Please, like I was going to start my summer vacation and not post the No. 1 Hot Them Summer ambassador.

Only Meryl in the Building

Hey, guess what, I’m going on vacation. I mean I’m still here, today. But tomorrow, vacation. (Don’t worry, I’ll leave you Vixens per usual.) But before I go, how about a little MURDER, but in another building. “Only Murders in the Building” is back for a third season. This time around it seems without a girlfriend for Mabel but with the addition of Meryl Streep. So, you know, you win some, you lose some. The series has been a frothy delight through its first two seasons, maximizing the unlikely chemistry between its star trio of Selena Gomez, Steve Martin and Martin Short. While I doubt that obvious “Father of the Bride” homage they preview will lead to any lesbian weddings, I at least hope they don’t drop all mention of Mabel’s sexual fluidity, because that would be lamer than her girl talk.

The Beautiful Suit Game

Hey, do you want to see the U.S. Women’s National Team in their World Cup team suits?

Of course you do.

I mean, that’s some serious drip. (Youths, am I using that right?)

Though, not to be outdone, Team England is coming in strong with the suit/vest/sporty jacket game.

Is this a soccer white party?

Sorry, futbol white party?

Like, why did we fight that whole war of independence thing again?

Not to be outdone, Team South African came with the full swagger.

So much swagger.

And song!

🇿🇦 Banyana Banyana always bring the style...and the tunes pic.twitter.com/Aj5yTkdlY5

— COPA90 (@Copa90) July 23, 2023

I love women’s sportball – and suits. Also, with all apologies to Portuguese kittens today, go USWNT!