Friday, February 08, 2008

My Weekend Crush

I voted for Hillary Clinton. After all the agonizing and the fretting and the politicking, I went with my heart. And my heart wants a woman, this woman, to be president. You wouldn’t believe the untold amount of shit I’ve gotten from my progressive friends and even female family members for this vote. How can you vote for the past instead of the future? How can you vote for the woman when you know the man is more likely to win? How can you vote for Hillary, period? Which, the more I think about it, makes me really fucking angry. But I don’t want to come across as an angry woman or, even worse, an angry lesbian. Heaven forbid. What I can say is that my vote was deeply personal. And I’m proud of it.

It has never been particularly cool to be a feminist – well, at least not for the past 30 years or so. But I am one, and unabashedly so. And I suspect it has never been particularly cool to be Hillary Clinton, either. She is the smartest person, the hardest worker, the most ambitious, the loudest voice in almost any room – rooms filled primarily with men. And for that, people despise her. They call her divisive. They question her motives. The same attributes that make a man successful make a woman suspicious. I’ve never understood the Hillary haters. I guess what they really hate is the audacity of her. How dare she, that woman?

However you voted (well, if you’re a Democrat, that is) your vote will be historic this year. And I’m not trying to influence your vote in any way; that’s your vote and yours alone. In fact, I really like Barack Obama. I’m tremendously moved by his words. And, yes, if he wins the nomination I will support him 100 percent and put up yard signs and wear pins and vote with gusto. But that doesn’t mean I can’t vote with gusto for Hillary right now.

What has always bothered me about the way these campaigns have been framed is that one is transformational and the other is the same old same old. Certainly, the Clinton name is a standard-bearer in American politics. But why raise one candidate’s “otherness” above another candidate’s? In our nation’s 232-year history there has never been a black man or a woman president. Ever. So why pit them against each other? Both are extraordinary. Both would signal a massive sea change in the culture of our country.

During Hillary’s Super Tuesday speech, I got an honest-to-God lump in my throat when she said:
“I want to thank all my friends and family—particularly my mother, who was born before women could vote and is watching her daughter on this stage tonight.”

Think about it, just 88 years ago this would have never happened. Why? Because women couldn’t vote then, that’s why. Not transformational my ass.

I think what makes it so easy for the continued sexism and misogyny that exists in our culture to thrive unchecked is that we are so ubiquitous. We’re 51 percent of the population, so we’re everywhere – your homes, your offices, your stores, your churches, your anywhere. You simply can’t avoid us. And therefore it may seem as if we’ve obtained full equality. But just listen for a little bit to the Chris Matthews and the Andrew Sullivans of the world and you’ll know that while we’ve come a long way, we’ve still got a long way to go, baby.

So, there it is. I voted for Hillary and I’m proud of it. I’m grateful for her service and in awe at her ability to take the crap that everyone throws at her. While I’m a pragmatist, I don’t think I should have to vote for one candidate simply because the world at large has a problem with the other. If a 35-year-old white man refuses to vote for Hillary, but will vote for Barack, is that my problem? If all the voters who are fired up for a candidate, but not necessarily a cause will go away if that candidate goes away, is that my problem? Sigh. I guess it is, since I live in this world. But I wish it wasn’t. So I thank Hillary for fighting to change this world we live in, against all odds and for all these years. Happy weekend, all.


slacker said...

I've been struggling with who to support. Part of the problem is that I think either Clinton or Obama will toss the gays under the bus if expedient. I can't go for any other party, cf., GOP platform and 2000 election for 3rd pty candidates, which leaves the Dems.

All things considered, throughout this week I've been realizing that I'd just rather have a woman in the white house. If you want change, putting in a woman would be change. She doesn't have the "cool" cred that draws the hipsters and the kids, but the hipsters and kids could run away at any moment should the right shiny thing come along.

As with you, Ms. Snarker, I think I've finally come to a decision...and it's been the same one.

And to anyone reading who doesn't think their vote is important, look at the ages of the justices of the supreme court. The court can do more things to f'up your life than you may realize. Given W has been stacking the court with far-right idealogues, don't expect that to change if non-action or apathy sweeps another Republican into office.

jess-nutt said...

Thank you for this! I feel the same way, and acted the same way here in Brooklyn.

mole said...

Amen! I happily took my place among the Hillary camp during Colorado's caucus. Yes, we were out numbered. Yes, we were under-represented (the precinct captain was an Obama supporter). Nevertheless, I'm proud of my vote and fervently hope that Senator Clinton wins the nomination.

As an aside, does it bother anyone else that male candidates are refered to by their last name, while the media refers to Clinton as "Hillary"? I understand that she's "branded" herself as such, but it smacks of disrespect and placation when the Y-chromosome-laden media speak of her on a first-name basis.

Here endeth my morning rant.

Ms. Snarker, thank you for voting your heart. It feels good, doesn't it"

Slym said...

Ms. S., I salute you, applaud you and offer you a very warm hug. It too, guts, character, strength and a good sense of "stand up for what you believe in" to come out here and make the declaration that you have just made. I can feel the weight lifted off your shoulder and chest :)

You are an amazing woman and I hold you in very high, actually even higher, esteem.

I also applaud all other women who will stand up and make their vote count. 51% is a lot of votes to let go to waste.

Rock On!

Anonymous said...

Opinion from Europe: I believe Hillary would be the better choice for your country.
All this ominous talk about "change"... you need someone who takes action and doesn't just promise "change"... what change?
I'm watching your country with a strange fascination... it's interesting. entertaining. but at the end of the day, I'm happy to live in a country in which the political system is - yes - better.

Sue J said...

Dorothy, I smiled when I clicked on this post. What a wonderful crush!

An excellent post -- I agree with you completely, and will be voting for Senator Clinton (because I agree with Mole) next Tuesday!

Anonymous said...

Dorothy Snarker, you are the best! I'd so high five you and buy you a drink, if ever I have the pleasure of meeting you in person.

It's about time that the most powerful person on this planet be a woman.

Great vote!

Charly said...

Nice weekend crush, Ms. snarker. :)

I am somehow glad that I can observe this whole thing from germany and don't have to make this choice..
I live in a country where the Chancellor actually is a woman and I didn't vote for her because the way she would (and actually does) lead a country is way to conservative.
I think noone should vote for hillary just because she is a woman but because she is the best choice here. she got the power, the connections and I cannot help myself, I just love her!
and she said it herself, didn't she?
"It took one Clinton to clean up after the first George Bush, it'll take another Clinton to clean up after this one"

Laurie Anne said...

I am a big Hillary supporter, I've always found her to be a very powerful speaker and a progressive politician. I can't wait to see what she would do as our president if given the chance (universal healthcare, etc.) so I am definitely voting for her!

Sarah said...

Very well put, and a lovely picture to boot, I'd love to see her in office!

Anonymous said...

As usual I agree with you Ms. Snarker!! You took the words right outta my mouth.

Ezee in SD

Anonymous said...

Thank you for what you said, really:thank you!
Well actually it doesn't really concern me since I'm French and don't have the right to vote thus.
But if I was American I would vote for Hillary even if I appreciate Obama.
Your blog is amazing by the way.

Dianna said...

Thank you for this post. I have been trying to explain my vote for Hillary this past week and you just summed it up beautifully.
Have a great weekend!

Big Daddy said...

Ms. Snarker I have been a long time lurker on your blog. I read faithfully but never comment. Today, I decided to comment. I too am in California and cast my vote for Hilary on Super Tuesday. My family is very much conservative and so is also very much against her winning. Thank you though for summing up so much of what I feel about the vote.

And may I just add that I think this post sealed the deal, I am now officially head over heels in love with you.

Thank you.

Rusty said...

Bravo and thank you.

We voted with paper ballots on Tuesday and when I put mine in the ballot box, I had tears in my eyes. I wasn't expecting that and it felt great.

Hillary '08

gypsywee said...

Oh prospicient Ms. Snarker, I hope your “Princess of Pussy” powers extend to the political realm. [Yes, I went there…classy shmassy!] I would love to see Hillary Clinton in the White House. I too am taking serious heat for my decision to caucus for her—and my reasons for doing so are the same as yours. *fingers crossed* Hill in ’08!

TheWeyrd1 said...

Well said..again! Here in Colorado I too was torn... I went to the caucus to vote for Hillary and in my precinct the captain was also an Obama supporter. Still we came away with 6 delegates out of 15 for Clinton (and I'm one of the delegates). I wrote about my experience on my blog (mostly as an educational service).

jetgirl said...

Amen, sister! I applaud your courage to stand by who you have always wanted to vote for even when your peers are pressuring you to vote for Barrack. Hos before Bros. lol.

Well, anyway, I'm kicking myself right now because I live in Texas and forgot to register in time, (I was a day late!) for the TX primary in March.

I will definitely NOT forget to register for the national election.

DON'T FORGET TO REGISTER LADIES!! (at least 30 days before election day) :P

jetgirl said...

I forgot to mention that I lurve that pic of Hillary. I don't know why the press always manages to post her unflattering photos. It's sick and sexist and I'm not even talking about the blatant sexist "journalists" that you have blogged about.

Also, your reasons for voting was very nicely put. It's exactly the way I feel too. I hope you don't mind if I steal some of your words.

Lastly, there is definitely a silver lining to the competativeness between Obama and Clinton. People for the first time really feel like their votes count.

Anonymous said...

I'm proud of you. If I were a citizen of the United States, I would vote for Hillary too. She is not the past, she is the future, the first female President of the United States. All women should vote for her, give her all the support she needs and deserves, because she cares and she is smart.
Let her write history and let her prove that women can be as good as men if not better. If you're still unsure, have a look at Angela Merkel.
Obama can become her Vice-President he is still young enough to become Hillary's successor.

HRC 44th US Pres said...

Yikes, don't entertain anything but HILLARY CLINTON's acceptance speech.
When comes down to it, women will prevail. They, we, us, them all of us standing on the shoulders of those who have come before and along side of us will vote for Hillary. Men have and will vote for Hillary, because her actions and her words align for a better future.
The right time, the right place, the right person. Hillary Clinton, the 44th President of the United States. See it, Hold it, Believe it, Own it.

Syracuse Scholar said...

Every vote counts. I oughtta know, since I live in Syracuse and both Barack and Hillary had the EXACT same number of votes (6,001) EACH [check it out].

I voted for Hillary by affidavit (since they didn't have my name on the rolls). So it might very well be my ACTUALY vote that will decide Hillary or Barack on Super Tuesday.
Of course I voted for the shock and chagrin of many of my peers. I just think she's the most qualified candidate. Duh.

rara said...

here's what i think

Misfitina said...

thanks for this- there are a lot of bullies out there trying to keep us in the closet.

skrailly said...

The page loaded and my first reaction was, "Hey, i have a crush on her too." Of course, I'll support whichever candidate gets the nomination but for some reason I am very suspicious of Barack's promise for change.

Anonymous said...

Good for you. I'm a black lesbian and had no problem voting for Hillary. I've studied Obama's record, what you can find of it, and even based upon this, it's easy to go with Hilary. His rhetoric of change is silly. They all want change, if they didn't no one would run. I would love an african american for president (especially a black woman, but then no one would really vote for her). I've met Senator Barack and he just doesn't cut it.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for articulating what I strongly feel in my heart. In the end, I'll support whoever our nominated democrat is, but I know Senator Clinton has what it takes to kick ass and get things done. The dormant feminist in me has risen up over the appallingly sexist coverage of this campaigne. Now I'm going to put my money where my mouth is and donate to her campaign. Thank you!

Amanda said...


WordNerd said...

Extraordinarily well put, DS.

Hillary is change. said...

Very well put, Ms Snarker.

Imagine a woman as the most powerful person in the world? Just really, really imagine it.

What a role model Hillary could be for young girls all over the world. What a change that would be from Paris Hilton, Britney, Lohan, Whinehouse etc.

Honestly, imagine a world where it's trendy for young women to be smart, studious, ambitious, drug free, sane, healthy, independent, and proud of their accomplishments without having to apologizes for it.

If that's not change, I don't know what is.

Hillary 2008

(Obama 2016)

Redstar said...

I'm finding all these terrific HRC supporters on the web! Thanks Shakesville!

Hillary Clinton for President!!

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to add my voice to the chorus of "Hear Hear"s! Very well put--you managed to articulate the thoughts in my head and heart in a way that's quite astonishing (and obviously I'm not the only one for whom this is true). Thanks, as always, for sharing.

maestra1985 said...

I voted for Hillary, too. Not just for me, but for my great-grandmother, who died before getting the right to vote. For my grandmother, whose husband always told her to vote for, even though behind the curtain she made her own decisions. For my mother, for my daughters, and for my future granddaughters. For Susan B. and every other woman suffragist. That's who my vote was for.

El N said...

Ms Snarker, again we share a brain. Way back in 91 when Hillary was stumping for Bill and I heard her speak in my little Kansas town (because they came to a red state despite its redness), I thought to myself: This woman should be the one running for president. Frankly, I am tired of men running things, no offense to them of course. But at some point, we need a different voice that's not full of male bluster and bravado. I of course want a Dem in the WH after these long years of misery, but if that Dem is a woman and that Dem is Hillary, all the better. I'm voting for her too, not in spite of the fact that she seems to get under people's skin because she's a woman, but because of that. No apologies.

ps. Women in power suits = sexy!

SARAH said...

i've been lurking here quite a long time and with my very first post, i am going to go superficial: i just can't believe that photo! wow.

voting is an great privilege and i applaud the seriousness with which you made your decision.

i live in SD, which is the last state to hold a primary. and it's a big fat red state, so it probably doesn't really matter what a dem does, but you know... you gotta get out there any do it anyway, damn it!

Lula de Montes said...

A long time ago, in another life, I was privileged enough to be in the audience at a lecture given by Madeleine Albright. There was a question time and she picked up on my question: her advice to a young woman trying to eke out a career for herself in a man's world. Her answer was quite simple: dare to speak up, dare to interrupt. I took it to heart. And I believe that many more women should too.

Hillary Clinton embodies this spirit for me. In recent years, as senator, she has transcended policy wonk status and has become a much respected committee member, who speaks up, interrupts and speaks out.

I hope she gets the nomination, so my SO can vote on my/our behalf. Time the US had a woman at the helm.

sageweb said...

Yippee for Hillary!

plasticcalifornia said...

Thank You! I have been fighting the same shit since she put her hat in. My support has been unwavering and it is the feminist in me that has made me proud to say "I VOTED FOR HILLARY" and to have her bumper sticker on my car.

pyewacket said...

Hmmmm, I don't belong to either party but I voted for Hillary twice for Senate simply because she was the best candidate for the job. She did not rest on name recognition alone to get herself elected...she really did her homework and got to know the people and regions around NYS. It was never out of the norm for her to be one town over talking about the Medicare and the cost of prescriptions drugs for seniors. The woman really does do her work on the issues. All that said and with all her knowledge, experience, and caring...I have noticed over the years she does "pull her punches" on issues sometimes. It is almost as if she already anticipates the opposition and thus does not go full out for the issues she knows are right and just. I do wish she would go all out on her stance on the issues because I sense she would come from the right place just about every time...and I think a sense of her being more sure of herself would strike a cord with the voters and tip things her way.

I do find it kind of laughable that voting for Hillary would not be a vote for "change" because having a female president...with a woman's prespective...would really be a change like no other.

Anonymous said...

The irony is: all that buzz about "change" from the Obama campaign, its Hillary Clinton who will truly deliver change.

You can conclude that because the mainstream media hate her. And they DON'T like real change, as it will threaten the their bosses power. They only pretend they are interested in change, which is why they're rooting for Obama! Obama, the pretender, hah!

Anonymous said...

As I am not an American I cannot really comment on who is the better choice. My only hope is that the Democrats win the presidency overall! Good luck to both deserving candidates

swampcat said...

I have been a supporter of Hillary Clinton since 2004. She is the most qualified of all the candidates. In her career as a lawyer and in public service, she has made this world a better place for children, the sick, the down-trodden. Hillary has been more than just a First Lady. People fail to see this.

She is a great Senator with the ability to work both sides of the aisle. I would like to see Obama as her VP. He is very young and could learn a lot under her tutelage.

steph said...

I usually read your blog for The L Word info. I smiled when I saw this week's crush. I have gone back and forth but when I saw Sadie B. Hawkins message to Hillary Clinton on, I realized that this is the best time to get an extremely qualified woman in the White House.

I will be happy to vote for either candidate but I really want Hillary to make it all the way.

Anonymous said...

I've been enjoying your blogging at AfterEllen for a long time -- how delightful to see you bloglinked from Shakesville :)-- so I rushed over here to see who your crush was, and I cheered. Yea! I agree with everything you said. Lifelong Dem, and I'm so damned tired of arguing with the women in my family who think Obama is the answer, and I'm tired of reading all of the misogynyst crap on the web (liberal sites run by men), and, frankly, I almost cried when I walked out of my polling place last Tues. after voting for Clinton. I'm 53. I'm ready for a woman in the WH. I'm a fan of Hillary's because she can not only do the job but talk back to the crap.

After last year's Donnie McClurkin mess with Obama, I decided that he had lost my vote unless he did something acutely repentent. Still waiting. 2007 and he's using homophobia to drum up votes. Hillary may not support gay marriage (yet), but I can't see her ever doing the same thing. Not now.

Thank you, Ms. Snarker! (Great photo, too!)

NYGayLady said...

Atta girl. My vote went the same way, despite, also, getting much crap from friends. I'm also very proud to say that three generations of women will be voting for Hillary in my family: my grandma, my mom, and me.

For me, too, it came down to going with my heart.

Anyway, cheers. :)

Anonymous said...

I came, I saw I caucused for Clinton today.
We were the few, but we were proud.
I felt proud that my 4 year old daughter (who could care less actually) got to see the democratic process in action, and could be present for such a historic event. She even got to see her mom make an of the cuff speech for Clinton because no one from her campaign was there.

Anonymous said...

Well said, Ms Snarker! I am saddened by all the people who say that they don't want to see Hillary get the nomination because that would galvanise the Republicans as well as the Democrats that hate her and lead to 4 more years of GOP rule. It sounds very much like the Conservatives will unite just to make sure to put a woman in her 'place', and the saddest part is that many seem to accept that that's just the way it is.

It's like tacitly agreeing that the USA is a backwards, sexist country where a highly-intelligent woman with the right education, experience and the connections can't be president simply because she's a woman. The USA is supposed to be the leader of the free world but even countries like India and Pakistan have had women at the helm in the past. Girls growing up in those countries, no matter how far down the gurgler the current social and political environments in those countries might be, can always look at past history and feel that they can aspire to having the top seat. The same can't be said of girls growing up in "America, land of the free".

mistharm said...

Hey. I just saw this link on Shakesville, and I wanted to say that its fantastic that you voted with your heart. The fact is, no one should choose your candidate for you; and if you feel Hillary Clinton is the right woman for the job, then more power to you and her!

aussie said...

I'm from Australia, and can't vote in your elections, but wish I could! We have recently voted in Kevin Rudd to be prime minister, and he has chosen a woman, Julia Gillard, as the deputy prime minister(ie. similar level to being the Vice President). She was the most qualified person for the job, and although the media tried to rustle up some noise about her becoming the first female deputy prime minister(and for some time earlier this year, was actually the acting prime minister due to Kevin Rudd being away overseas), most people simply accepted it and just expected all the ministers to get on with their jobs, ie. who gives a crap if they're a bloke or a sheila? (translation for those not down with the Australian lingo: a man or woman)

Kevin Rudd, a self-professed Christian, also appointed an out lesbian, Penny Wong, to a senior ministerial position, simply because her qualifications made her the best person for the job. How I wish Americans would emulate this "just get on with it" attitude a bit more instead of being caught up in the cult of personality and religious fanaticism.

Rusty said...

Ms. Dorothy
I think you struck a nerve.
Hillary '08

mousy said...

Hats off to you, Dorothy, for standing your ground and choosing Hillary!

I think Hillary's the underdog right now. Last year, I thought she had a chance. But now, with Obama's campaign in full steam and all the polls saying that an African-American stands a better chance in winning the presidency than a feminist/progressive woman, I feel bad for her. And she's one half of the power couple that the radical Right Wing loves to hate.

I think many Americans don't have the patience to look hard enough to see the brilliant, principled and humane person beneath all the muck and black propaganda the radical Right Wing and the media have heaped on her. I thought that this year, the most powerful nation in the world would finally follow the lead of some Asian and European countries in choosing a female commander-in-chief. But from the looks of it, it may take another century for that to happen. Boohoo!

jeangrey8 said...

I agree 100% with what you said..I too am a feminist and it is not very popular with my family..they are all die hard barack fans..I do not have anything against barack but Hiliary has more experience and has the tenacity to see her plans was a simple choice for me really..

Trent said...

My vote is definitely going to Hillary when my state's primary comes up. As you very elegantly put it, Ms. S, some men have a problem with a strong woman in charge. But maybe that's exactly what this country needs.

Hey, I just realized something. Hillary's initials are identical to that of the Human Rights Campaign.

That can't possibly be a coincidence...

Another European here said...

Oh dear... It looks like Obama is gonna win the Democratic vote.
Oh well... As long as he beats McCain.

Honestly, I cringe at the mere thought that the world's most powerful duo might be:


Please, America let this not happen!

Thank you from the rest of the World.

D. said...

Go Hillary!

What a cheap shot ... don't vote for the past.
Hillary we need you!
Thanks for stating your beliefs!
Hillary '08

m00se said...

And a fellow IU alum too? Who knew? Thanks for popping over.

Bettina said...

so very well said!!

Anonymous said...

I had never "caucused" before but went on aturday to lend my voice to those for HILLARY. Then I found myself becoming a delegate from my precinct and am now hoping to go all the way to the national convention. A long shot but I want Hillary to win so badly!

Anonymous said...

Good for you! I wish there were more comments like yours, rather than the ones found in here:

I've had enough of the Clinton attacks. Obama supporters may fall back on the tired "He didn't vote for the war" phrase, but they've certainly started another.

Audra said...

I LOVE everything you said and can't wait to go cast my vote for Hillary next week. It's the first time I feel like voting in Texas actually counts for anything.

By the way, what a gorgeous picture of her.

Trent said...

I can't wait until next Tuesday so I can vote for Senator Clinton. Hell, I voted for Bill twice before, maybe the third time's the charm :D

Still4Hill said...

She's my weekend crush this weekend and EVERY weekend. She's not just adorable (and sooo edible).She's effing smart. They can't cope.


She's delicious@