Become a Killah

I hardly ever watch Saturday Night Live actually live. But I made an exception for a certain host-musical guest combo a couple weekends ago (no, not you Timmy Chalamet…) And, well, the Lady did not disappoint. Plus, posting Next Gen Gaga followed by the Original Mother is giving (wait, is “giving” still something the kids say? They already abolished “slay!”)

Not only did she perform her back to her ra-ra, ah-ah-ah dance days hit “Abracadabra,” she also debuted the live version of “Killah.” Something about her unfettered performance, down to that primal fucking scream, just speaks to me in this moment. Like, it has a real 2018 Juliette Lewis “Can we be saved!?!” vibe to it that I feel deep within my everything. Save us, Lady Gaga! Or at least let us scream along with you. Can you believe it’s only Tuesday and he has only been in office for two damn months? Who has some drumsticks, I need to BEAT SOMETHING.

The Gay Grammys, Again

Well, in case you missed last Sunday’s Grammy awards show, I can summarize it for you simply. The gals and the gays, particularly the gay gals, stole the show – again. I don’t know what it means to have two good Grammy shows in consecutive years (I mean, who would be surprised by an apocalypse at this point, honestly?) Last year we had Tracy Chapman and Brandi Carlile and boygenius (and Joni Mitchell, for the straights). This year we have Chappell Roan and Billie Eilish and Cynthia Erivo and Janelle Monae and Lady Gaga and Doechii and St. Vincent and Brittany Howard and Queen Latifah – am I missing any queer ladies, ladies? (Don’t worry, the straights had Sabrina Carpenter and Charli XCX and Raye and Shakira, if you’re into that sort of thing.)

And it was the women – gay and straight – who not only stole the show with their performances, but also with their show of solidarity against all the horrors of our current political/societal hellscape. Like Chappell speaking out to shame record companies into paying its developing artists a liveable wage and health insurance. Or Doechii speaking out to support Black women and dark-skinned Black women in particular. Or Shakira speaking out to send her solidarity to all the immigrants. Or Lady Gaga speaking out to say trans and queer people deserve love and support. Or Alicia Keyes speaking out to praise the power and beauty of diversity and inclusion.

Also special props to Janelle for speaking out to drag Nelly for performing at that Orange Turd’s inauguration at the Grammys afterparties. Ladies and gentlemen and every other gender identity which absolutely exists, this is exactly the energy we expect from our most celebrated artists right now.

Janelle Monae calls out Nelly during the GRAMMYs after-party for performing at Trump’s inauguration:

“F**k you Nelly, you sold out. I used to think you were cool, but now you look like a motherf**king fool.” pic.twitter.com/GQxnGVy7n9

— Pop Base (@PopBase) February 3, 2025

It’s a refreshing change from the Golden Globes, which was relatively free of high-profile political statements. Granted, that was 15 days before the horrors of Orange Turd’s 2.0 administration began. But, shit, if we didn’t all know this was coming – at least if we were paying attention.

Anyway, I wish I could share some of these performances but in one of those truly genius corporate titan moves, you can only find the concert videos on the Grammys websites and not even all of them either. Now if the Grammys would just stop having Trevor Noah host, because I find the way he roams through the audience making celebrity smalltalk extremely cringe – as the young folks say. Also treating the return of The Weeknd to the Grammys like the second-coming of Martin Luther King Jr? Even more cringe. See, this is why you leave hosting, and everything else, to the gays gals from now on, Grammys.

Mask Up, Ladies

Never mind women in tank tops. These days, women properly wearing face masks in public is my new sexuality. After seeing how amazing Cate Blanchett looks in a face mask to prevent the spread of coronavirus, I thought I’d share the love. Because, and I cannot stress this point enough, all women look amazing in face masks. Why? Well, wearing a face mask means 1) you believe in science, 2) you care about other people, and 3) you aren’t an enormous asshole – at least not on the issue of spreading a potentially deadly and debilitating highly communicable respiratory illness.

I know, it seems absolutely insane that six months into a global pandemic we still have to try (largely in vain) to get more people to wear face masks. Like they’re mandated in my state (as they should be across the county) yet compliance is still hit-and-miss. But the very same people screaming about their “FREEDOMS!” are the people who keep telling Black Americans they won’t get shot by police if only they comply. But ask them to comply by putting a piece of cloth over their big, stupid mouth and nose to keep those around them healthy and you’d think we rolled the Constitution into a blunt and started smoking it in front of their faces.

Anyway. Long story short, be like Charlize, wear a damn mask. And, while you’re at it, wash your hands and fill out your Census.

Charlize Theron

I have every confidence if Charlize/Furiosa/Andy ran across you not wearing a mask, they would 100 percent kick your ass.

Janelle Monae

Giving out food to those in need and accessorizing with a hat. She can do it all.

Tilda Swinton

Masks, for humans and space aliens.

Jennifer Lopez

Ageless, flawless, but definitely not maskless. Bonus points for the tank top on a Tuesday, too.

Lady Gaga

Honestly not sure if this mask is medically sound, but it sure is hard to miss.

Naomi Osaka

Wearing the names of Black women and men killed by police on your way to winning her second U.S. Open championish is, what the kids today call, a whole mood. A very, very good mood.

Chrissy Teigen

A mask plus three pizzas? Who says the perfect human being does not exist?

Hillary Clinton

We probably wouldn’t even still have to be wearing masks if the stupid Electoral College didn’t exist.

Kamala Harris

A mask, a blazer and some Chucks. Now that’s my Vice President Straight Bette Porter.

Gender Fuck Met Gala

The Met Gala is, as the kids today say, extra. It’s always been extra and continues to be extra by design. This year’s theme - camp - seemed destined to bring out the very extraest exta in all the richest and famousest among us. And for some it did. And others wouldn't know camp if it hit them in the fucking face.

But, good news. The queers, and many of the queer favs, at the event this year came out swinging from the chandeliers (or, in Katy Perry’s case, wearing one). So in a week filled with so much rage-inducement, a little joy in the effervescent frivolity of fashion. No, it won’t save the world and stop the ice caps from melting. But, at least for a little while, I hope it makes you smile. Or, you know, boobie wink.

Janelle Monae

All hail the Queen of Fashionable Cubism! Eyes, everywhere. Lips, who knows. Hats, so many! Winking boobie? FLIRTING, BUT MAKE IT FASHION.

WINK WINK: @JanelleMonae's had an eye-catching outfit at the #MetGala. pic.twitter.com/dzkd7vcutw

— AP Entertainment (@APEntertainment) May 7, 2019

Lena Waithe

Yes, black drag queens invented (or inventend, whatever works) camp. While I'm not sure anything can top last year’s Rainbow Cape, this is close. Oh, did I mention the pinstripes are lyrics to “I’m Coming Out.”

Lady Gaga

Please, like Gaga was gonna fuck up camp.

Danai Gurira

This isn’t necessarily camp, but damn it’s HOT.

Tracee Ellis Ross (Bonus: Sarah Paulson Photobomb)

Is it even the Met Gala if Sarah doesn’t photobomb someone famous with totally relatable emotions?

Kristen Stewart

I can’t say I approve and it’s definitely not camp. But it’s fascinating to watch K-Stew reintroduce herself as punk rock Meg Ryan.

Tessa Thompson

Yes, Mistress. Right away, Mistress. Whatever you want, Mistress.

p.s. I feel this picture on a deep spiritual level. In my pants.

SGALGG: Oscars Edition

Turns out not having a host meant we weren’t subjected to a number of dumb skits and stunts, plus far fewer video montages and far more female winners. And some of those female winners, and other gals in attendance, did some decidedly gay gal things. So, without further ado, your 2019 Oscars Straight (and Some Gay) Gals Acting Like Gay Gals.

Amy Poehler, Tina Fey & Maya Rudolph

That suit on Amy automatically makes her the gay-mo on this Tina and Maya sandwich.

Frances McDormand & Olivia Colman

I’d watch a whole movie of Police Chief Marge Gunderson trying to whip a petulant Queen Anne into shape. And making out.

Yalitza Aparicio & Elsie Fisher

I would like a movie about them starting a junior detective agency, and I would like it now. Bonus points if Elsie’s character only ever wears three-piece suits.

Michelle Yeoh & Awkwafina

Look, if Sarah and Holland can May-December, why not?

Sarah Paulson & Holland Taylor

Speaking of our favorite cross-seasonal couple, didn’t they look grand?

Helen Mirren & Sarah Paulson

Looks like Helen knows about Sarah’s love of mature women. And likes a challenge.

Melissa McCarthy & Glenn Close

I mean, they’re not doing anything particularly gay together – except wearing capes out in public.

Queen Latifah & Danai Gurira

The look Dani is giving here shows she knows exactly what it meant to lesbians to have Queen Latifah introduce “The Favourite.”

Allison Janney & Emma Stone

I don’t mean to kink shame, but Allison seems *really* excited about eating that stroopwafel/Emma Stone.

Regina King & Angela Bassett

They’re having an arm porn contest and we’re all the winners.

Tessa Thompson & Kiersey Clemons

Wait, does Janelle know?

Madonna & Lady Gaga

No comment needed.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Oscar's Ladies Edition

So the nominations are out for this year’s Academy Awards. Ten very talented women got the nod in for Best Actress and Best Supporting Actress honors. I don’t know who will take home the shiny naked golden dude, but it is no secret that “The Favourite” remains my favorite. Plus, Her Royal Highness looks stunning in a tux.

But, really, they’re all my favorite because they’re all wonderful actresses and they don’t look too shabby in a suit either. So, really, that makes them all winners in my book.

Best Actress

Yalitza Aparicio, “Roma”

I have not seen “Roma” yet and I feel bad about that. But I feel great about this nomination. So maybe that evens out my karma?

Glenn Close, “The Wife”

Damn, Glenn is making the best tux in this post race very Close. Sorry, I’ll let myself out.

Olivia Colman, “The Favourite”

Can a suit be endearingly dorky? Because, yes.

Lady Gaga, “A Star Is Born”

Oh, I get it. Wearing a suit with extra room to make way for an EGOT.

Melissa McCarthy, “Can You Ever Forgive Me?”

I miss Melissa’s Spicey. Not the real one, obviously.



Best Supporting Actress

Amy Adams, “Vice”

Man, I really liked her in “Sharp Objects.” Sorry, I’m not gonna see “Vice,” so that’s all I got.

Marina de Tavira, “Roma”

Ditto from above. But it’s on my list! I promise!

Regina King, “If Beale Street Could Talk”

Please, like I’m the only one who had a crush on her all butched up in “Miss Congeniality 2.”

Emma Stone, “The Favourite”

Lesbianism looks even better on her than this suit. (What? It’s a lot of pattern.)

Rachel Weisz, “The Favourite”

Rachel was really bucking for the Cate Blanchett/Gillian Anderson Lesbian Affections Oscar this year with “Disobedience” and “The Favourite.” May more actress vie for the honor in the future.

Naked Lady Monday: VMA Edition

With each passing year I get more, “You kids get off my lawn!” about the MTV VMAs. So much noise, posturing and bright lights. And I know this year everyone wants to talk about Miley Cyrus and her tongue, teddy bears and twerking on some Footlocker employee who wandered onstage. (True Fact: If you say Beetlejuice three times Robin Thicke appears to have Miley grind on him.) While I, like everyone else, have the tendency to shake my head at Hannah Montana’s current shenanigans, I also don’t think there’s anything particularly new and/or scandalous about female pop stars going through a look-at-me-I’m-so-raunchy phase and/or career. Please see Madonna, Christina Aguilera, Rihanna et al. To quote the lady herself, “It’s our body we can do what we want to.” It’s not the end of the civilized world as we know it. Though, honey, those flesh-tone bikini bottoms are doing no one any favors.



But what I’d rather talk about is the fact that Lady Gaga sold her new single “Applause” to the Kia hamsters. What the what? Look, I understand everyone needs to make a buck. I have no problem with blatant commercialism. This is America and capitalism is our only one true religion. But if you’re going to shill for some dancing rodents, please don’t name your album “ARTPOP” and expect us to take it seriously. Though, in her defense, “Applause” is the best damn anthem for Tinkerbell that anyone has ever written.



Also, just to make sure my Gay Card gets renewed (I mean, even Obama acknowledged Gaga as our fearless leader), the Lady does have the most amazing ass. Sure, that seashell underwear was probably uncomfortable. But at least it gave us this. Now that is dedication to one’s art.

America, the beautifully gay

It feels like there’s been an enormous party in the USA for the past week. Since the Supreme Court’s historic rulings, each new milestone in equality has been yet another reason to celebrate (marriage starting again in California, green cards given to same-sex couples, etc.). Hell, it even brought Lady Gaga off the bench (she’s still recovering from hip surgery) to help kick off NYC Pride Weekend festivities. All in all, we’ve got more reasons than ever before to be proud of our country this Fourth of July. Happy birthday, America. Equality looks good on you.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Drag Edition

There’s gender fuck, and then there’s Gender Fuck. The world witnessed the latter last weekend when the incomparable Lady Gaga went full on Jo Calderone for the entirety of the MTV Video Music Awards. Not only was it one of the only times I’ve ever seen her in an outfit that didn’t involve mirrors, bubbles, spikes or require refrigeration. Regardless of what you thought of her lengthy leering performance as Jo, you’ve got to admire her commitment. Hell, Gaga was even packing. So today let’s celebration those who dare to drag with mustaches – or without. All hail the kings.

Kristin Scott ThomasEat your heart out, Ivan Aycock.

Katharine HepburnThey don’t make movie stars like this anymore – male or female.

Brooke ShieldsDid you know Brooke pulled a “Yentl” in the movie “Sahara?” Neither did I.

Barbra StreisandOf course, nothing beats the real thing.

Anne HathawayUnsurprisingly, the woman who looks like a Disney princess in real life looks like a Disney prince in drag.

Natalie PortmanNow I’m thinking they missed a brilliant potential “mustache ride” scene in “Black Swan.”

Veronica WebbAlso unsurprisingly, beautiful models make handsome fellows.

Christy Turlington, Naomi Campbell & Linda EvangelistaVery handsome fellows.

Julie AndrewsNever mind raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, Julie in a suit and tie is more than a few of my favorite things.

Lady GagaWhen he’s not glowering ferociously at the world, that Mr. Calderone is one GQ motherfucker...

...But when he is he kind of looks like an extra from “The Outsiders.”