My Weekend Crush

We’ve all been giving our cable and streaming services a workout during these – as what every single commercial on TV keeps telling us are – unprecedented times. Now, more than ever – as every one of these damn ads keep reminding us – we are looking for distraction from our sad realities. If only for a little while. So, again, to celebrate the start of Pride Month please enjoy all of the queer media I’ve enjoyed through all of this. Perhaps in at least what we’re watching we can be – again as they can’t stop saying in these ridiculous ads – all in this together.

“The Half of It,” Netflix

The long (long, long, long, long, long) awaited cinematic follow-up for “Saving Face” director Alice Wu debuted while most of us were all still safely sheltering in place. This is a sweet teen story of sticking out and sticking up for our true selves grows on you with each watch. It’s a very solid if at times achingly earnest look at teenage love from a viewpoint so rarely seen in mainstream cinema. While the story has some tonal issues – it can veer from almost campy teen satire to sincere spiritual philosopher in a flash – it’s innate sweetness wins out in the end. And I am always going to relate to a story about a nerdy Asian-American girl who realizes she is gay while living in small-town America. Always.


“Vita & Virginia,” Hulu

This stylish retelling of the love story between writers Virginia Woolf and Vita Sackfield-West plays more thirsty than romantic. While there is admirable chemistry between its stars Elizabeth Debicki (as Virginia) and Gemma Arterton (as Vita) – I mean at least the ladies have The Look down – the passionate story can get tripped up in its own theatrical telling. There’s some style over substance happening, for sure. But at least Elizabeth and Gemma know how to telegraph their desire – and flat-out lust – for each other effortlessly. In fact it’s these looks that are the films strongest suit. And, while this may make me sound like an old fogey shaking my fist at those kids on the lawn, I was also put off by the film’s insistane that this period drama should be set to a relentless EDM beat. I was not expecting this literary longing to be set to techno, but here we are.


“Never Have I Ever,” Netflix

Yes, I know, another teen comedy. But this sweet (I know, another sweet thing, but I’m gravitating toward sweet stuff – OK?) comedy series from Mindy Kaling is another example of why our diversity is our strength. The show centers around a 15-year-old Indian-American teen girl dealing with the sudden death of her father, the cultural pressures from her family, and normal teenage dramas. But instead of being just another teen show, it’s a very funny and very smart and very refreshing take on the universal horror of being a teenager in America. Plus, there’s a lesbian storyline which I wish there was more of, but then I always wish there was more gay stuff. Always.

“Tommy,” CBS

So, I’ve decided “Tommy” was trying to be the “West Wing” of police shows. The series about the first female police chief for the city of Los Angeles, played by Edie Falco, who also happens to be a lesbian wants to make liberal folks feel good about law enforcement – like what Aaron Sorkin’s hit drama did for politics. It was admirably acted, though its emotional arcs were uneven. And, not to sound like a broken record, but there needed to be way, way more gay stuff.

So, what LGBTQ stuff have you been watching? Share, kittens, because we’re stronger united – as every corporation won't stop telling us. Happy safe and healthy weekend, all.

Gender Fuck Thursday: Trailer Edition

And the movie trailers just keep on coming. You might remember me talking about “Late Night,” the new Emma Thompson, Mindy Kaling, Nisha Ganatra project about a legendary female late-night TV host trying to save her career.

Now, I don’t see anything overly gay – except for Emma’s wardrobe which is just an astonishingly fun assortment of suits and blazers. But you may recall Nisha’s feature film debut was “Chutney Popcorn” where she cleverly cast Jill Hennessy as her girlfriend. So I’m going to credit her with all the delightful Gender Fuck Thursday wardrobe choices.

Late Night Ladies

More good news and lesbian worlds colliding, one of the biggest hits out of Sundance this year is “Late Night.” The movie stars Emma Thompson and is penned by Mindy Kaling and directed by Nisha Ganatra. What makes this of gay lady interest besides Emma’s presence (because Emma is always of gay lady interest) is director Nisha Ganatra. Those old enough to remember back to 1999 will no doubt have fond memories of her 1999 feature debut “Chutney Popcorn.” The cross-cultural family comedy-drama starred Nisha as a young Indian-American lesbian who agrees to be a surrogate for her straight sister while dealing with her parents traditional views. Oh, and she was also clever enough to cast Jill Hennessy has her girlfriend.



So, needless to say, I can’t wait to see what this amazing trio comes up with. And, with any luck, there’s be something for us gay too. You know, besides Emma.

"Ocean's 8" Lesbian Movie Review

Yes, kittens, “Ocean’s 8” is a lesbian movie – in its heart where it counts. OK, fine, technically it’s a lesbian-in-spirit movie on screen. But, come on, Cate Blanchett is called “Lou” and slinks around in a series of increasingly amazing suits and then rides off into the sunset on a motorcycle – quite literally. So, Harold, that’s pretty lesbian.

But really, what “Ocean’s 8” is is a reminder that the world needs to be shown more women together, period. In fact, if you put a group of smart, talented, charismatic women together and give them something to do other than pine for a man, the result is basically magic.

Look, Hollywood has been doing this for decades with men. Men at work. Men at war. Men in prison. Men in space. Men stealing shit. Men buying shit. Men, men, men. We get it, my dudes. You do things.

But, here’s a revolutionary realization, so do women. Women also work, go to war, go to prison, go to space, steal shit, buy shit. Women, women, women. And, guess what, they’re good at it, too. And it’s interesting, and different, than just watching a bunch of dudes do the exact same thing.

Take your “Killing Eve” or your “Orange Is the New Black” or your “Hidden Figures” or any other entertainment that trusts women to tell their own stories, to be their own stars. There is something deliciously alive and fresh about the chemistry between these casts. Why? Because for so damn long we haven’t been shown women as much more than the love interest, side kick, token female.

But guess what, we contain multitudes upon our multitudes.

“Ocean’s 8” is unabashedly fun and unquestionably clever. It’s also unashamed of its femininity. Now by femininity I don’t mean it’s “Ocean’s 11” with a cheap pink makeover. This isn’t that “Made Just For Women!” crap they try to sell us like pens and razors. This is fundamentally female in a way that celebrates women’s abilities and differences. And, at the same time, should be universally interesting because, duh, women are interesting.

All of the women are wonderful – Cate, Sandra, Anne, Sarah, Rihanna, Mindy, Awkwafina, Mindy. I would happily watch them read all of updated privacy policies I have steadfastly ignored over my lifetime out loud. And then I would ask them to read them again, but more slowly.

In short, I will happily watch “Ocean’s 8” again – and again, and again. Will I make Lou and Debbie kiss in my head each time? Of course. But then, everyone else is, too. Because, as I said, “Ocean’s 8” is totally a lesbian movie. It just doesn’t know it yet. But, luckily, we do.

My Weekend Crush

One of the very best things about “Oceans Eight” – besides being a movie featuring eight talented and diverse actresses pulling off the kind of heist caper previously relegated to mainly menfolks - is the parade of suits Cate Blanchett has worn leading up to its release. I mean, the woman has suit range.



Oh, did I mention that last suit has RAINBOW STRIPES down the legs? Because it does, it really does.



You know Sandy approves of her suit game, you just know.




(and, of course, you know Sarah Paulson approves, or at very least has lovingly ribbed Cate about her suit game.)

The other best thing about “Oceans Eight” is how Cate’s co-stars love to stare lovingly at her impeccable visage. I mean, they’re no Kristen Stewart in the smitten department, but close.



Happy “Ocean’s Eight” premiere weekend, all.

Ladies Who Laugh

Well now, isn’t this a nice thing to wake up to? Cate Blanchett and Sarah Paulson showed off their BFF troublemakers sides when they appeared together on “Today” yesterday. The two friends had Hoda Kotb and, later, Savannah Guthrie laughing until they cried – quite literally. It also features Sarah teasing Cate about not winning an Oscar for “Carol.” Cate teasing Sarah for only having one an Emmy. And then Cate sits on Sarah’s lap and, well.



Anyway, the whole thing has to be seen to be enjoyed, rewatched, enjoyed some more.



p.s. I know you guys like me, you really like me, because not one, not two, but three of you send me this video all like, “Snarker, guuurl, you’ve GOT to see this!” My most sincere and lesbian thanks, ladies.

p.p.s. Only oblivious straight women would ever deign to ask Cate and Sarah what movie they were in together. The indignity! Also, straight ladies, you should totally watch “Carol.”

p.p.p.s. If you want to see the entire cast (well, six of eight) of “Ocean’s 8” play Never Have I Ever and crack each other up, please enjoy. I am here to spread joy and many, many wonderful ladies laughing together.

Eight Is More Than Enough

Yes. That is all. Yes.

A Perfect Eight

Look, I know Christmas was yesterday, but who is to say we can’t celebrate a second day? (Heck that song with the partridge says we can celebrate 12 days, dammit.) But instead of two turtle doves, on this second day of Christmas I give you eight awesome ladies. I know, I know – you might have seen it already since the “Ocean’s Eight” trailer was released before Christmas. But, let’s be honest, it’s the gift that keeps on giving.

p.s. I love every. single. thing. Cate Blanchett is wearing.



p.p.s. I also love what Awkwafina is wearing.



p.p.s. And what Sandy is wearing.



p.p.p.s. And what Sandy is doing to Sarah here.



p.p.p.p.s. Fine, I love everything, everyone, all of it, the whole eight-chilada.

No Time Like the Present

Just like probably everyone born after 1963, I read “A Wrinkle in Time” as a kid and loved it. How could you not? A girl travelling through the space time continuum to fight evil and save her family? Hello, yes. And now that the trailer for the new big screen adaptation I have a feeling kids old and young will remember again why they loved this story so much. The first trailer for the film from director Ava DuVernay is a feast for the eyes. And, just as exciting, is how wonderfully diverse the cast is. Look, folks, this is science fiction – we get to make the worlds we want to see. We’re bound by nothing but our imagination. So why not be inclusive? Exactly, no reason at all.

Another Ocean To Cross

I have said for the past two months (78 days, to be exact) that “Oceans 8” is one of the only things I’m looking forward to in 2017. And now, dammit, I’ve finally realized that “Oceans 8” isn’t coming out in 2017. It’s not coming out until 2018. And summer 2018 at that. GODDAMIT, UNIVERSE. Throw me a bone here. I need every sliver of joy I can get to make it through each day. At the very least you have to give me more than one single picture of the elegant eight sitting together/apart in a subway car. Fine. Sigh. I’ll take it. Hey, it is a rough year. We take what we can.

My Weekend Crush

So today we have a good news, bad news situation. Because I want to send you into your weekend on a good note, we’ll deal with the bad first. Bad news, guys, they probably won’t be making a “Ghostbusters” sequel. The all-female reboot that made manbabies shit themselves has apparently not done well enough at the box office for the studio to proceed. Because it was such an affront to their fragile manhood to allow four smart, funny, talented women to play roles once occupied exclusively by men, we now don’t get to find out how these ladies would have dealt with Zuul. Well, at least we got to ruin all those men’s childhoods along the way.

So now, the good news. A new “Oceans Eleven” spinoff is in the works, but this time with an all-female cast. YES! YES! BRING ME ALL THE MEN’S CHILDHOODS TO RUIN! I know, that alone seems delicious enough. But wait until you get a load of this cast: Cate Blanchett, Sandra Bullock, Anne Hathaway, Rihanna, Helena Bonham Carter, Mindy Kaling and Awkwafina. HOLY SHIT, GUYS. GIVE IT TO ME NOW NOW NOW NOW. This news is so exciting on so many levels including but not limited to anything to do with a gloved or ungloved Cate Blanchett, two Asian cast members, freaking Rihanna, etc. etc. etc. The only question now is who will be No. 8? ? I have a few suggestions: Helen Mirren, Angela Bassett, Kathy Baker, Kate McKinnon, Tilda freaking Swinton.

For all those who criticize the idea of an “all-female” anything, just think for a minute. Really think. No one calls “Saving Private Ryan” and “all-male war movie” or “Reservoir Dogs” an “all-male crime caper” or “The Hangover” an “all-male gross-out comedy.” Yet, that’s what they are. And, also, pretty much, all-white to boot. The reason male is the default isn’t because male is the default experience for the world. Quite the opposite considering women make up 51 percent of the global population. It’s because of years, decades, centuries, eons of systematic and institutional conditioning to construct society in a way that benefits one and only one group of people. Dudes.

So in light of both this good news and bad news this weekend, I just want to remind menfolk at home of one thing. When women enter into what was perceived as men’s spaces it is, in fact, not an assault on your personhood. Not in the least. Instead, and this is important, it is a validation of women’s personhood.

You see? You see how that works? The world is meant to share. And, if you take even a tiny step back, you can see how ridiculous it is that we don’t. Happy weekend, all.

p.s. While we’re on the subject of men being terrible, please enjoy these women explaining why they aren’t funny. Hey, if I’m already a man-hating lesbian, best to play the part thoroughly.

My Weekend Crush

Dammit, television. Why you gotta hurt a girl like this? So, “The Mindy Project” has been cancelled. Don’t ask me why because it was by far one of the best, pure sitcoms currently on TV. But to just call it a sitcom would be selling it short. In essence, each episode was a mini-romcom each week. But the good kind, not the bad kind you end up watching on a Sunday afternoon because nothing else is on and the remote control is too far away. That kind usually stars Katherine Heigl.

Series star and creator Mindy Kaling had concocted something that managed the seemingly impossible of being both frothy and pointed. For a show about a superficial person it was completely self aware in its self aggrandizing. And funny, damn was it funny. Fine, so I wasn’t necessarily in love with this season’s pregnancy storyline. But now it’s cancelled by Fox, and another really good show bites the dust. Sure, there’s some pretty serious talk of Hulu perhaps picking it up. Which would be great but, shit, I’d have to subscribe to yet another streaming service?

But regardless of how this all turns out, it’s network TV which is the biggest loser. Because it has lost another smart, diverse woman’s voice from primetime. And that is ultimately all of our loss. Dammit, television. Happy weekend, all.

My Weekend Crush

In life, and on TV, if you persevere it often really does get better. Few shows have proved that more recently than Mindy Kaling’s series, “The Mindy Project.” What started as a fairly superficial show about a fairly superficial person has evolved into, dare I say it, a surprisingly thoughtful and consistently hilarious show about a superficial person. Now in its second year, “The Mindy Project” can make me laugh, - really, really laugh – more reliably than almost any other show in TV. (Don’t worry, “Parks and Recreation,” you’re still my No. 1. Also, you’re another prime example of the It Gets Betterification of TV shows in their second season.)

But I digress. What helps to make “The Mindy Project” so special is a) it’s crackerjack cast and b) Mindy herself. To get in character and be superficial, this is the only show on TV centered solely around South Asian female character (Mindy is Indian-American) and one of the few shows on TV centered solely around a not stereotypically skinny female character (Mindy is by no means overweight, but her non model-thinness is touched on frequently). Sure, she’s kind of a brat – but dammit if she isn’t a fun brat to watch.

The real Mindy is whip-smart and more than aware of all the bullshit expectations, obstacles and trappings that come with being “different.” As she told Parade magazine in September:

On standing out in the white male-dominated comedy world.

“There are little Indian girls out there who look up to me, and I never want to belittle the honor of being an inspiration to them. But while I’m talking about why I’m so different, white male show runners get to talk about their art.”

On the attention paid to her appearance.

“I always get asked, ‘Where do you get your confidence?’ I think people are well meaning, but it’s pretty insulting. Because what it means to me is, ‘You, Mindy Kaling, have all the trappings of a very marginalized person. You’re not skinny, you’re not white, you’re a woman. Why on earth would you feel like you’re worth anything?’”

Yeah, she gets it. She gets it. Her show gets it. Happy weekend, all.

p.s. SPOILER, WILL ROBINSON: Duuuude, I can’t believe I have to wait until April to see how that kiss turns out.

Girl in the mirror

I’ve long since gotten over the expectation that what I see on my television will be an accurate reflection of what I see in the mirror each morning (and night, or really anytime of day I happen pass a mirror and feel vain). TV is by and large the domain of a bunch of impossibly heroic/dramatic/photogenic cops/doctors/lawyers and the occasional impossibly perceptive writers/mentalists/math geniuses who all dress really well and have uniformly blinding white teeth. After all these years of owning a remote, I’ve come to expect it. Just like, unfortunately, I’ve come to expect that a good 80 to 90 percent of those impossibly heroic/dramatic/photogenic cops/doctors/lawyers and occasional impossibly perceptive writers/mentalists/math geniuses with the impossibly white teeth will be white themselves. Sure, TV gives us a sassy black friend or wise brown coworker or whatever other ancillary character they deem OK to be a less white shade of pale.

So imagine my pleasure this season when a few more faces on my television – not a ton mind you, but an important few – look a little more like me. We have Lucy Liu in the CBS crime drama “Elementary,” Mindy Kaling on the FOX sitcom “The Mindy Project,” Suzy Nakamura in the “NBC comedy “Go On” and Jamie Chung on the returning ABC fable “Once Upon a Time” have all offered up major new female characters of East Asian or South Asian descent. Sure, a handful of characters may not seem like a lot. But it’s more than we get most years. Especially considering the number of major broadcast network shows with major female Asian/South Asian characters currently can be counted on only one hand – “Grey’s Anatomy,” “The Good Wife,” “Glee,” “Hawaii Five-O” and “Bones.” I might have missed a few here and there, but not many.

So why am I excited about Lucy, Mindy, Suzy and Jamie? Because as numbed to the status quo as we all become consuming media day in and day out, it’s always nice to be reminded that, yes, Virginia, there are other ethnicities out there. And there is still something unspeakably powerful about seeing someone who looks at least a little more like you on TV. In fact, I remember the very first show I saw that centered around a female Asian character. And I remember being ridiculously excited to watch it. That was back in 1994 when Margaret Cho’s “All American Girl” debuted. The show, it turns out, sucked. But by no fault of Margaret’s. But my thrill at finally seeing someone like myself on TV remained. It mattered then and it matters now.

Of course, this new mini-wave of Asian female characters is but a drop in the bucket when you consider that combined East and South Asian population is close to 3 billion people. That’s a big honking chunk of the world’s overall population of 7 billion folks. But, hey, we’ve got four new female faces on our TV this fall. So, you know, baby steps. Anytime TV looks a little more like all of our collective mirror, it’s something to smile about.

p.s. I totally already ship Mulan and Sleeping Beauty. Bring it, Sleeping Warrior.