Friday, April 28, 2006

Rush Limbaugh is a big fat idiot redux

Sometimes, there is such truly satisfying poetic justice to this universe. Resident conservative blowhard and big, fat idiot Rush Limbaugh was arrested, AGAIN, for illegal prescription drugs. Oh, the hypocrisy. So ripe, it practically drips.

Don't you just love it when the moral majority trips on its own immoral stupidity. Just kind of makes your day, or possibly week. Hell, it's been a tough month. Let's go crazy and declare it Rush the Dumbass Drug Addict month. We've earned it.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Not so cutie patootie

Well, this is just wrong. I mean, I know Rosie is family and all, but she is not a good fit to co-host "The View." From Meredith Vieira to Rosie O'Donnell. That shit ain't right.

Not that I have anything against Ms. O'Donnell. And yeah for more lesbian visibility on TV, and all that good stuff. But it is just that the show was barely salvaged by the presence of Vieira and Joy Behar in the first place. Without Vieira to throw in a calming voice of reason, it'll just be Joy and Rosie sparring non-stop with Star and the blonde dingdong.

According to "Extra," the official announcement will be made tomorrow.

Mas Bellos? What a difference en Espanol makes

Apparently, beauty standards differ greatly depending on what language you speak. In Spanish, Jennifer Lopez takes the cake. Oh, and for whatever reason, Spanish-speakers only get 50 beautiful people, not 100 like us personas de habla inglesa. Some sort of currency exchange problem perhaps?

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

The "duh" news story of the day

Angelina Jolie was dubbed the world's most beautiful as the cover girl for this year's People’s “100 Most Beautiful People” issue.

Some selections, they just make themselves - n'est pas?

Behold the power of Jolie.

Michelle Rodriguez, yeah, she's that hardcore

Badass actress Michelle Rodriguez opted for a five-day jail sentence over 240-hours of community service yesterday after pleading guilty to driving while intoxicated in Hawaii last year. The "Lost" star blamed her erratic behavior at the time (screaming and yelling at officers; being carried into the Kailua police station after refusing to stand up) on steroid injections she had been taking twice a month to treat allergies to "dust and cockroach resin."
"I wasn't right in my head," she said in court. "None of that verbal behavior was directed towards them. It was directed towards myself."

Hmmm. Michelle Rodriguez, too fast and too furious? Not that little angel.

Though, the cynical side of me was thinking, since we all known Michelle's rumored Sapphic entanglement (yeah, a "roommate," uh-huh) perhaps she thought five days in an all-woman's jail wouldn't be that bad. Sure beats picking up trash in an orange vest.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Oops, she did it again

Oh. My. God. Y'all! Please, let this not be true. Britney Spears may actually be pregnant. Again. Let this be just idle tabloid fodder. For the love of all that is right and good in this world, let her not spew forth another spawn.

The universe cannot be subject to ANOTHER sculpture of Britney giving birth on a bear-skin rug. As her genius spouse would say, "Y'all Aint Ready." Word.

In more joyful news, the Little Folksinger is back

Moving on, the world can rejoice at the news the Ani DiFranco will return to the stage after almost a year out of commission due to tendinitis in her wrist.

I've seen Ms. DiFranco about half a dozen times and each time has been, well, Wow. If she brings her little travelin' road show to your town, go.

Seriously, go now.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Dorothy Surrenders to her weaker impulses

Now that the apocalypse is imminent (the spawns of Tom Cruise and arch enemy Brooke Shields born on the same day, hello!?!) I thought it would be a perfect time to start posting about all the effervescence sludge that fuels our national obsession with celebrity. Some of the tastiest blogs on this subject come from our gay brothers. But us gay gals can bring the snark, too.

Think of this as part Dorothy Parker, part Dorothy Gale and all friend of Dorothy. Let's dance in the eye of the tornado together. And make fun of Paris Hilton while we're doing it.