Wednesday, February 18, 2009

SGALGG-Off: Stephanie March

Wow, since yesterday's Tank Top Tuesday-Off was such an unprecedented success (Note: the votes are still rolling in, so I'll talk to Don King later about that rematch), I thought we'd try another grudge match. But instead of tank tops, it's a Straight Gals Acting Like Gay Gals-Off today. Or, more accurately, Straight Gals Battling Like Gay Gals for a Straight Gal. You know, SGBLGGFSG. Fuck, that acronym just killed the alphabet.

Right, so if you aren't to bloodied from yesterday's battle, here it goes. In honor of Stephanie March's upcoming return to “Law & Order: SVU” as ADA Alex Cabot, I give you a bare-knuckles, no-holds barred brawl for her affections between...drum roll...Mariska Hargitay and Tina Fey. That's right, both women launched a thousands 'ships with their gay subtext (or maintext in the case of “30 Rock”) involving Stephanie. And both women look awfully pretty standing next to her. So, who takes it, ladies and discerning gentlemen? Also, your vote counts double if you can correctly pronounce SGBLGGFSG six-time in a row without breaking your tongue. I mean, we wouldn't want you to damage your tongue. It would make the drooling so much more unsightly.

Olivia Benson & Alex Cabot
Liz Lemon & Gretchen Thomas

So, who should Stephanie end up with? And feel to phrase your answer in the form of a fantasy sequence.

77 comments:

jennifer from pittsburgh said...

What if Steph is a cylon? Then she could end up with both! With copies left over to destroy the rest of us :)

The Gentleman said...

I'm going with Mariska on this one (and honestly who wouldn't? ;))... only because I'd hate to see you and Tina fake-brake up and fight for fake-gaylimony...
she's still your fake-wifey, right?? :P

Maxine Dangerous said...

Shut UP! She's headed back to SVU?? Oh happy day, happy day, happy day! :D And I'm giving all the points to Mariska. She's hot, so tough and... and... what... pseudo-gay with the short hair and butchness... and I get the feeling she'd be all over Stephanie (sorry, Alex *grin*) instead of Liz Lemon with her wary 'you can... do stuff to me' assertion. :)

[/over-analysis]

Collins said...

normally i would go with liv on this one, but that first picture of liz with thomas is the deal breaker. plus, i would pay money to see how liz's bi-curious sneaks got along with thomas's oh so out of the closet shoes...

Anonymous said...

She will end up with both, no need to choose.
Alex Cabot and Gretchen Thomas are two of the United States of Stephanie :-)

Anonymous said...

Best.Post.EVER! And Mariska for shizzle. I mean, come on, Olivia is like She!Hulk! on that show. She's kicking doors and taking command... no question. They are eye-shagging each other every time they're on screen even if they're talking about their boyfriends or heck even accompanied by their dates, they still have more chemistry with each other. So yeah, Alex & Olivia forevah!

Paula said...

Yeah, I'm going with Tina Fey. Look at the eyes in that first picture! Not to mention - she's totally wearing a tank top!

www.ComeTogetherGiftBaskets.com

Anonymous said...

MARISKA MARISKA MARISKA

Especially with the hot hot short hair cut!

Do you know how many times I've watched SVU and thought, "Please be gay. Please be gay. Please date me?"

Well, it's a lot.

Anonymous said...

Mariska - hands down! Er...or hands up...or hands on. Yeah.

Anonymous said...

definitely MARISKA!

;)) babs

WYM said...

Oh sweet mercy, please oh, please let it be Olivia and Alex. Stephanie March just makes such a sexy lesbian...as proven on 30 Rock, but she was Liv's sexy lesbian first. Sorry Liz!

Anonymous said...

I love Tina Fey, but it's gotta be Mariska. Short haired MariskaBenson.

Although, if Mariska and Maria Bello hooked up, coz they are so totally SGALGG (or secretly gay girls acting like straight girls acting like gay girls - or SGGALSGALGG for short (hey a girl can dream)) Tina Fey would surely console Stephanie, which would lead to all sorts of stuff.. being done... if you catch my drift.

Anonymous said...

I favor both couples, but I much prefer Stephanie as Alex. So, I'll go for Alex and Olivia. The thought of them- two smart, sexy, strong, and powerful women being together is mind-blowing.

Anonymous said...

No clear winner here either, too close to call. I think a couple of bouts of turkish oil wrestling could determine the winners!

KayakMango said...

Fans of SVU have been waiting so long for Alex and Liv to get together, its ridiculous. here is a pretty good fan fiction, just one piece of evidence that Mariska is the top pick!!


www.svufiction.com/viewstory.php?sid=3792

Anonymous said...

i'll come back to read them all,
anyway, who's don king kong?
what match?

Tea Lady said...

Going with Liz Lemon. Those two make a cuter couple.

DirtyJeepDog said...

Oh, without a doubt - Olivia Benson. So way much better than Liz Lemon - or Bobby Flay for that matter!

Anonymous said...

Dammit Dorthy!

My fiance and I had just gotten to that high point in our relationship and now the news that Alex and Olivia are going to be back sharing a screen?

It's bad enough both women are on my fiance's 'List'...I simply can't compete!

Anonymous said...

Tina Fey, case closed!

ToonCat said...

Who should Stephanie end up with? Am I allowed to say me? Please? Wifey can have Mariska!

Ok, ok. I understand there may be a queue so, Alex and Olivia all the way!

Anonymous said...

GAHH! why do you make me choose?!?! ordinarily i'd go with Olivia b/c she just kicks butts and takes names on that show annd you threw in pic of here w/ her short hair :) however, those pics of liz are pretty cute, so i might just have to say liz lemon & gretchen thomas...

Honey said...

OMG MARISKA!!!!
the subtext from SVU is TOO MUCH to bear. Hopefully her new episodes will not disappoint.
...Hmm, Can i have Gretchen Thomas? My birthday is in June.. that's close enough right? :)

M said...

I've got to say Mariska though she was so great with Tina on 30 Rock. It's really a win-win situation with either!

Unknown said...

Why bother choosing? Sharing is caring. How can I (or anyone for that matter) choose? Stephanie could be shared between both lovely ladies...fantasy sequence commences...

Anonymous said...

I think this might be my favorite post EVER! That includes GGALGG Gold Medal Edition! As much as I would like both Tina and Mariska to be blessed with the wonderful Stephanie March, I think the only chance of this happening is on SVU. Liz seemed pretty sure that she wasn't interested, but Det. Benson's sexuality is still VERY ambiguous. Well, to me anyway ;)

Anonymous said...

tina tina tina <3

Anonymous said...

Mariska, of course.

Anonymous said...

Alex Cabot is coming back? Can't breathd, must find, thunk.

erinjaws said...

well mariska of course. and whats up with the conversation that she had with stabler last week. something is definately going on!

madmags said...

Olivia and Alex. Oh, yes.
Liz and Dorothy, Why not?

Anonymous said...

Dude, it has to be olivia.

Liz Lemon can be the girl who battles Olivia Benson for the love of Alex Cabot but only after the get together first or the GWBOBFTLOACBUATGTF- BAM!

Anonymous said...

While I love both ladies I'm gonna have to go with Tina Fey.

Unknown said...

As much as I love Tina Fey, Mariska wins hands down. They are the next best fanfic pair besides Xena and Gabrielle.

Anonymous said...

Mariska

neon_rainbow said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
neon_rainbow said...

I'm saying Mariska because a) when I picture Olivia and Alex together a big old amount of drool falls out, it's not pretty but it's good
and b) this Olivia/Elliot subtext people are seeing, is gross, and needs to be corrected with Alex/Olivia subtext. : )

Unknown said...

Wow, I'm really surprised of myself because of the two last posts. I mean I was so sure I would choose Bette over everyone and however yesterday I prefered Tasha. And yet today I find out that I would put Liz Lemon behind anyone else, especially behind MARISKA!!!
Can't wait for the tomorrow surprise!

Anonymous said...

Alex Cabot and Olvia Benson are meant to be together. I've made up stories about those two being together. I choose to believe Alex lived as Gretchen Thomas while in the WPP. It is just a matter of time before Alex returns to Olivia.
My heart soars just thinking about that sexy couple.

Anonymous said...

Mariska and Stephanie for sure.

Anonymous said...

Ummmm Mariska.....

plasticcalifornia said...

Considering I wrote one of my honors theses about O/A, I have to go for Mariska...It's a shame they let her hair grow out after she had cut it again last season :/

SVU Season 2-4 was Olivia/Alex greatness...sadly Cabot's return episodes have been nothing short of disappointing, and lets not even talk about the canon nightmare that is Conviction.

Anonymous said...

my vote it for alex and oliva, sorry tina.

TheWeyrd1 said...

I KNOW you love Tina...but I gotta go with Mariska!

Norma Desmond said...

Oh, gotta go with The Lemon on this one... if for no other reason for that black dress with its delicious low-cutness.

Anonymous said...

45 comments?
i don't get today's post.
what's goin on?

what i got actually,
i felt i almost hear someone's
laughing. 'a hahahahah hihihihi'
something like this.

in addition to i'm very healthy.
just feeling.

ah, today was tired,
but very exciting.
how's yours? pretty good?
have a good night, of course
good dream. right?
see you.

mtskc said...

I am a big fan of SVU and normally I would say Mariska but due to the context of the shows I think Stephanie & Tina Fey

The bonus is that leave Mariska for me!

Anonymous said...

Mariska all the way :-)

Anonymous said...

forget tank top Tuesday, it's now soggy knickers Wednesday. Alex and Olivia all the way...once Liv gets a haircut!!

Labrysia said...

Oops,that's hard to say, given the fact that being German and being deaf I do not know the show (depending on DVDs with GOOD English subtitles) and having an inborne adversary against Gretchen as a first name (Gretchen simply is a diminuitive of Grete and an ooooooold name for parlour maids [like my grandmother's]).

Ok,ok, ranting over, it's number two Tina Fey I guess ;-)

Did I ever metion how much I love your blog?

Anonymous said...

mariska with short hair!

Unknown said...

mariska, definitely. separately, they're hot, hot, hot. together. FUCKIN' hot, hot, hot.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I cannot pick. This is a Sophie's Choice moment for me, trying to decide between Mariska and Tina.

I simply cannot cut either one of these women loose.

I <3 Mariska and Tina.

:)

Anonymous said...

There is a reason she's called Liz Lemon... Tina Fey!!

Silent Bard said...

Hands down, Mariska

Sarah said...

Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska...Mariska.

Olivia & Alex = Total Wet Dream!

Anonymous said...

Bette vs. Tasha vs. Shane in a tank top= Competition... HARD competition

Olivia Benson vs. Liz Lemon for the affections of Alex Cabot= No Contest

MARISKA ALL THE WAY!

Anonymous said...

Olivia, the hottest cop on tv, for sure. I don't watch any other cop shows...only SVU b/c Mariska is so hot.

Admittedly, I also don't get the Tina Fey thing. She's smart and funny, but I don't want to sleep with her.

Anonymous said...

man, i can not wait to see her on svu. yeah,could you imagine alex and olivia in a B&T sex scene. oh, my. i love these two togather

Anonymous said...

Nothing makes my heart sing like Mariska/March HoYay!

I used to think I was the only one picking up on the looks going on those two all over SVU.

Bring on the glasses of justice!

Trace said...

Without a doubt ... Mariska Hargitay

Anonymous said...

Mariska all the way! Although I love the theory that Gretchen was Alex's secret WPP identity...

Big Shamu said...

Threesome.

Anonymous said...

Has to be Mariska - Benson never looked at Cabot like letting 'her do stuff to her' would be much of a chore.

While Gretchen found Liz mildly amusing, Cabot looks anything but amused by Benson, more like 'just shut and kiss me' or 'you're beautiful when you're angry'.

Unknown said...

I love me some Liz Lemon. But oh man. It's gotta be Mariska. :]

Anonymous said...

OMG no competition it most certainly has to be Olivia, everyone else pales in comparison to Alex/Liv.

Anonymous said...

oh come on!! mariska of course !!!no doubt!!!

Ashlee Blackwell said...

Do I have to choose? Maybe I'm a bit biased towards the Benson & ALex pairing. I do however a petition a return of Gretchen Thomas!

elliB said...

I just turned on one of Bobby Flay's shows on Food Network and who should I see cooking with him but his lovely wife, Stephanie March. Lucky bastard.

rick said...

on svu she should have a scene at a bar and know the bartender that night and she should see this hot guy and tell the bartender to let her and the guy go to the back and have a super hot sex scene with him

Mal said...

@Plasticcalifornia how did you get away with writing your honors thesis on them?!?! Totally doing that. P.S. Alex and Olivia so totally have a thing, have you all SEEN Olivia's breakdown when she sees Alex alive in "Loss"?

plasticcalifornia said...

Is it totally weird that my nick name is Mal...email me at plasticcalifornia@gmail.com if you are curious about the thesis.

Anonymous said...

yo creo q con olivia, vi todas la temporadas de la ley y el orden y parecen tener la re quimica mas de la que tienen olivia y elliot

Anonymous said...

both. but me 2(: curse you bobby flay

Anonymous said...

Here’s one from left field: What about Alex and Serena Southerlyn, the blonde ADA from the original L&O who actually is a lesbian? They worked at the DA’s office at the same time (Alex came in 2000, Serena in 2001) so they would have had to have known each other. Who’s to say they didn’t go out for drinks one night after Trevor Langan stood Alex up or something, got drunk and ended up in bed together?

Alexa said...

If I may... totally got this.

www.fanfiction.net/s/6935964/1/The_Thomas_Conundrum

Candice said...

Mariska FTW! Everyday, forever and ever.