Once (Again) I Had a Secret Love

You know the one vignette in “If These Walls Could Talk 2” that starred Vanessa Redgrave and Marian Seldes as a longtime lesbian couple in the 1960s? I always fast forward through that story. Always. I do because it’s too painful to keep reliving the collective grief of our past (and still too often our present) like that. That’s not entertaining to me anymore. That’s just hurt.

Well, what if they made a whole movie about that vignette, but in present day an in France? Yeah, remember when I said I was grateful for all the variety in lesbian representation this year on screens large and small? I should have been more specific and said I didn’t mean a redux of that painful longtime secret love storyline.

Here’s the thing, this could be a very good film. And critics and festivals have awarded it thusly. In fact it is France’s official selection for the international feature for the Academy Awards. So, yeah, I will very likely watch this. Plus, even though I chafe at the secret love thing, I do greatly appreciate seeing older actresses as the central stars and centering their full and vibrant lives. Women don’t stop being interesting at 25. Or any age. Period.

But remember when we were talking about coming out stories as the predominate LGBTQ+ narratives told in mainstream fiction? Well, we’re not wrong – they truly are the stories they love to tell about us. But, with each retelling we are the ones who relive a specific trauma together. And in a story like this, where years of loving and living and just getting through all the muck that comes with agreeing to go through all of our space and time together is again reduced to “just friends” – it enrages as much as it aches. How many times do straight audiences need to be told and retold these stories until they understand?

I hope this is a great film and perhaps one of the last films that needs to be made on this particular subject.