Wednesday, April 30, 2008

There’s something about Mary-Louise

Thank God for grown-ups. Sure, I know youth is all the rage. I mean, just look at the new cover of Rolling Stone and you’ll see four girls I couldn’t pick out of a lineup, or would ever care to. These girls, who no one will remember in 10 years, are apparently “It.” Well, not for me. I'll always pick age before beauty. You can keep the expressionless sheen of youth, thank you very much. I’ll take my women with some laugh lines and crows’ feet. Experience is sexy. Period. So yesterday, while trying to avoid Day Two of Miley Cyrus Naked-Backgate, I found exactly the kind of diversion I was looking for: The grown-up sexy of Mary-Louise Parker.

When I think about the women who really make my pulse spike and brain drool, Mary-Louise is always near the top of my list. She is effortlessly smart. Not in a brainiac way that flaunts a bulging ego, but in that natural way where a conversation over a glass of wine would take you to places far and wide and relentlessly interesting. In fact, as I’ve said before, she’s the kind of straight woman who makes me think more highly of whatever lucky man is wise enough to partner up with her. Also, dude, check out that ass.

The 43-year-old actress is featured in PaperMag this month. The article, written by what I can only assume is a straight man who gets it, pays its own relentless praise to the “ineffable hotness” that is MLP. I mean, just check out his description of her:
“On this afternoon, she's decked out in a black Gucci jacket, black Prada boots, a gray knit dress by Mon Petit Oiseau and knee-high stockings that call out, 'Hey, I dare you to try to avoid staring at my thighs.' … Parker casually uses a large vocabulary, slipping in words such as "disquieting" when something much less expressive would suffice … And like her character on Weeds, she affects a big-eyed, girlishly surprised expression when something not so surprising transpires -- for example, a reporter tells her he doesn't read much fiction. It's kind of adorable and makes you want to surprise her.”

I say if you’re going to objectify, objectify wisely.

And, you know what else I like about grown-ups? They know when to talk and when to shut up. In addition to being youth-obsessed, our culture is infatuated with exposé. And all these supposedly pretty young things polluting our airwaves are more than happy to oblige.

Well, not Mary-Louise.

“Maybe [reporters] think I’m going to go, 'Congratulations, you’re the one, I’m finally going to [really open up].' It’s just not going to happen – ever. So I don’t know why people ask certain things. Because I’m never going to answer them.”

Atta girl, I mean, woman.


imthey said...

It is with every new blog that you post that I come to adore you more and more... for you and I seem to have similar tastes when it comes to the ladies, and Mary-Louise Parker ranks high on my list as well.

Since I first glimpsed her back in 1990 in Longtime Companion, she began her ascent to the upper echelons of my list of favorite leading ladies and continues year after year to remain high on that list.

TheWeyrd1 said...

mmmm...MLP...mmmm I have enjoyed her in many things (Fried Green Tomatoes and Boys On the Side go without saying...but I like to say it anyway!) Unfortunately, I haven't seen her in Weeds since I generally don't like to pay for more than basic TV...okay I have basic plus so I can watch LOGO and I'd probably would pay for here! if I could even get it. But I draw the line on premium, except for 3.5 months of Showtime. Now where were we? Oh yeah, MLP...mmmmmmmm.

vikki said...

I have always loved MLP. Smart and sexy with a little edge!

Penny Cillin said...

I absolutely adore MLP, she is fabulous. Plus I have a penchant for brunettes who are smart, sassy and refreshingly beautiful.

bluntspoon said...

Since when is 'disquieting' a large word?

jackie said...

Oh, but you must see her in the sublime "Weeds"--MLP is sexy, badass, angry and funny. Get the DVD, settle in and luxuriate...

Anonymous said...

I agree, I'll always pick age before beauty, too.

somehow, I have a problem.
It's not relate with woman.
I think I tolerate it enough.

ye- I'm talking to myself. never mind.

Pyewacket said...

"In person, Parker resembles her TV, movie and theater characters, only more so. The sheen of her signature alabaster skin is brighter, the bulge of her breasts more prominent."

I am not surprised. :P

Great article, but one thing I bet the author of it missed....while he was busy counting the hordes of straight men in suits waiting for tickets to see MiLPh in a not-so-great play...the huge number of gay, bi and bicurious women dressed in their F-me best who walked into the theater with tickets in hand and sat in the front rows.

She has always been on the top of my list...her crooked little smile always makes me melt.

Anonymous said...

I adore MLP, but I also LOVE The Hills....The girls are vapid, but the show is so engrossing

MissAkilahC said...

mmmm yummy mmm I can't think.

aluminumcandy said...

I agree with you completely. Young beauties are so come-and-go, but aged beauty lasts forever.