Tuesday, August 14, 2018

Step Into Yourself

Appearance, particularly in the LGBT community, is fraught with meaning and political overtones. What does it mean to visibly present as queer, to be visibly butch or visibly andro or visibly trans. What does it mean to us within the community and to the straight world outside when we are seen, instantly, a certain way. But freedom, true freedom, is the ability to look and act and be however we want – no matter what the rest of the world of our LGBT friends think. Of course, that is the tricky bit. Be yourself is simple to say, hard to do.

Still when you see someone come into themselves, and finally feel completely comfortable in her/his/their own skin – well, that’s such a magnificent feeling and such a beautiful moment.

I love (love, love, loved) Lena Waithe’s thoughtful, powerful explanation for cutting her hair. What could have just been a glib red carpet interview turned into a profound statement of truth and intent.

“I felt like I was holding onto a piece of femininity that would make the world feel comfortable with who I am….

When I cut it I felt so free and so happy and so joyful. And I really stepped into myself. And if people call me a butch or say she is stud or call me sir out in the world, so what. So be it…

I am here with a Prada suit on, not a stitch of makeup and a haircut. I feel like, why can’t I exist in the world in that way?”
Why can’t I exist in the world in that way, indeed.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, I really love that quote. I had an interesting experience with an older butch woman from my softball team when I was in my early 20s who questioned my look and I wish I had been able to explain myself as eloquently as Lena.

This butch woman came to my house in a suburban town from SF and at one point said I get why you have long hair and have to look more feminine, everyone here must be so uptight and you have to try to blend in. Little did she know I had grown up there and came out as a 15 yr old, I shaved my head, wore boys clothes for years...but it just didn’t feel like me. I felt like I was doing this thing so that I could fit in with the LGBT community. When I was older I grew my hair out and did my tomboy thing and I just felt way more...myself. It always bothered me that in that moment in my 20s I couldn’t explain to this woman that I was just being me.

Carmen SanDiego said...

You do you