Lizzie Borden Took A Lady Lover

Fetch me my axe, ladies, I’ve got some grinding to do. Actually, nix the axe. I’d probably just cut off my own arm. But, I am rather enjoying this new take on the Lizzie Borden story. You know the one – where Lizzie Borden took an axe and gave all those whacks. Except this time Lizzie Borden is Chloe Sevigny and the family’s maid Bridget Sullivan is played by Kristen Stewart. Oh, and did I mention they’re lover? Yeah, it’s like that.

From the trailer the film has a real “Dolores Claiborne” vibe but with an axe instead of an eclipse and with lesbianism instead of mother-daughter estrangement. I don’t know whether this will be any good but already it seems it has to be better than the pretty terrible Lifetime movie “Lizzie Borden Took an Ax.” Because that was truly bad, and not good bad.

May Lizzie and Bridget and their axe live happily ever after and never, ever have to eat pigeon again.