Friday, January 06, 2012

My Weekend Crush

Recently, I came in possession of a mix tape by someone lovely which I promptly popped into my CD player on the way home. While listening to said mix tape (Fine, it’s a CD, but mixed CD sounds like something your financial adviser tells you to invest in. I think, I don’t know, I’m a writer. My financial adviser is a Magic 8 Ball) the song “Drive” popped up unexpectedly. Of course, being a gay lady, I am familiar with Melissa Ferrick’s “Drive.” How could you not be? But if by change you haven’t heard it before, hold onto your pants. Because they will spontaneously drop while listening. Also, um, you might not want to be in public.

Still for me, it had been a while since I listened, really listened to “Drive.” (I posted a fanvid featuring it not too long ago, but it was abridged and didn’t pack its full, shall we say, oompf). But if you do take the time to give it a proper once over, you will have to agree. This may just be the sexiest lesbian sex song ever. Like, seriously, ever. Fucking hell, that shit is hot. And that brings me back to Melissa. Seems like she has been around forever, always there bringing the dykeliciousness. For a while she was The Other Melissa. But she has always been her very own Melissa. And what that is one hard-working, hard-strumming, hard-loving sexy motherfucker. And she’s still right here, still out there, still making us ladies who like ladies swoon and sweat. So thank you, Melissa. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts and lower regions for putting delicious words and music to our deepest, dirties desires. Now, where did I put those pants? Happy weekend, all.

p.s. If you haven’t heard/seen her epic live performances of the song, well, just go ahead and take off your pants right now. Because she’s hot and hilarious. And it just saves so much time.


sarcofugus said...

This is a delicious, yumalicious, damn, all right - it's practically sung sex. And I absolutely love it for that!

And hell, Melissa's voice is soooooo sexy, its oozing with orgasmic-ness (and yes, I'm aware that's not a word) ;)

Happy Weekend!

Patricia said...

her guittar must have a lot of fun! Such a semi-fragile confident lady...great!

Vicki said...

that live performance might be the best thing i've seen/listened to for ages :) thank you so much for introducing me to Melissa's charms... sexy as all hell hilariously true.

Vicki said...

* AND hiliarously true, i mean :D

Anonymous said...

Honey, honey, honey . . . to "drive" all night, really?
Why that's just hocus-pocus talk, a myth, fantasy making ;)

Julie said...

One of my favorite NPR moments ever was when they played the instrumental part of the song in between segments. The friend that I was with and I just looked at each other and our mouths dropped. Did they just play a segment of the sexiest song ever? NPR?? Must have been a hell of an intern to pick that one!

Love THIS Melissa!

beebee said...

I have been under a rock. I have no idea how she escaped my gay radar. thanks snarker!!

Anonymous said...

“I have been under a rock. I have no idea how she escaped my gay radar. thanks snarker!!”

Darling, you were under a rock, I was in bronze… We’ve all had our crosses to bear I suppose…

Melissa Ferrick is GAY?!! Good God! I had no idea! NO idea!

Additionally, that first picture is one of the finest examples of Thursday gender fuckery I have ever seen!:D

Thank you Snarks darling! This more than makes up for the glaring lack of any Christmas gift!


Anonymous said...

Snarks darling, I must away! I am being recalled to the front:

It is time. There is a war to be fought, *and won*. I fear that thanks to your lovely blog (amongst other things :) ), my poor comrades in arms would be quite justified in laying a charge of ‘dereliction of duty’ squarely at my feet. What can I say darling, you have proven to be quite the most effective (not to say charming!) little distraction! ;)

I will look in whenever I can. And of course I will be back in time for the return of our favourites; the gorgeous Secret Service Agent and the sultry English scoundrel (I am quietly confident she *will* indeed be back darlings!) In the meantime, I wish you and the readers all the very best for the New Year! Do be *careful* though darlings; it is after all 2012! :)

“Is the world really going to end this year PD?”

Don’t be silly darlings; of course not! However, it will in all likelihood prove to be another one of those ‘bumpy rides’ we are becoming ever more accustomed to. Should our villainous overlords actually be STUPID # enough do the unthinkable and attempt something along the lines of the video below… Yell ‘foul!’ darlings! Yell ‘FOUL!’ Then carry out mass citizens’ arrests of all the NWO bastards in your area, before they have a chance to ‘mass arrest’ you (or your activist friends) and send you (or them) to bloody Guantanamo! :/ (The NDAA – and a happy New Year to you too Obama!)

# Videos in that vein are ALL OVER the Internet!!! Are you listening boys?!!! :) (They don’t call it the ‘Info War’ for nothing darlings! :D )

You see, if anything like that were to happen I would anticipate the *immediate* implementation of martial law. (Incidentally, what the hell *can* one wear with a bloody bright orange jumpsuit?! Jade? Onyx? Silver in an Art Deco motif? What hairstyle would best mitigate that particular couture car crash?!! In the event of SHTF; suggestions on an encrypted postcard (PLEASE!) to PD c/o MI5.5! :) )

The video is IMHO accurate apart from the bit about Ken Livingston -the former mayor of London- supposedly talking about the Olympics’ having a “Zion theme”. What utter bollocks! He never said any such a thing!

Finally, the thesis presented in the video does *sort of* *maybe* *perhaps* put that W13 finale into a *potentially* sinister new light, eh? (Oh believe me darlings; it really is a barrel of laughs being a Truther sometimes! :D ) Scared? Paranoid? Moi?! Nah! What would be the point?! Vigilant? Very much so, yes! :)


Anonymous said...

PS I must warn you Snarks darling; if you publish any more apologist nonsense on that damn (murdering, womanising, corrupt, lying, treasonous, warmongering etc. etc. etc.) Clinton woman or that rogue Romney, I will *not* be held responsible for my actions! ;)

P(2)S As I will most likely be unable to keep my end up regarding any kind of regular Truther updates, may I instead recommend the lovely Sonia of Montreal’s ‘Truther Girls’? Darlings, she’s hot! Damn HOT!!! And unlike the likes of Maddow, she’s no MSM whore! (Although, to be fair, she did do that ‘Hookers for Truth’ thing a while back... :D )

Has a lisp ever sounded so sexy?! Sonia darling, MARRY ME!!! (You’re already married? Damn.)

P(3)S What do I *really* think will happen at the Olympics? Nicole Cooke to take home the gold in the cycling? Hmm, I suppose that’s more of a hope. :) Nicole darling, you had better *not* be doping!!!
Actually darlings, I have some important news. The IOC has just anointed me ‘The Deluxe Extra Strength Special Ambassador (First Class)’ to ‘London 2012’! I am to take whatever action I deem appropriate in the event of any underhand, unsporting, or otherwise un-British shenanigans! To prospective cheats everywhere – my cricket bat and I are looking forward *immensely* to making the acquaintance of those gloriously naked, fabulously toned, steroid-enhanced little backsides of yours! Especially the girls!!! :D Hmm, perhaps it would be preferable if they did indeed catch old Cookie? That, after all, is one BELTER of a Welsh arse! *Cough ahem* Crashing on!

P(4)S It’s a leap year! Make your move darlings! Make your move! A well appointed sumptuous Salt Lake safe house awaits! :D

P(5)S And so I say a fond adieu! *PD swallows her RED pill*

egghead said...

In the first picture, Melissa looks like David Cassidy from the Partridge Family! Hell that's almost better than Spiteri and Elvis!:D

(Still trying to figure out how one drives all night, whether double AA's are involved or not. ;))

sarcofugus said:
"Sung sex."

Egads, did I read that the glorious and fabulous spammer, PD disappeared into the matrix? She will be missed. :(

Anonymous said...

that awkward moment when i drive with my parents in the car and that song begins to play on my ipod. longest 6 mins ever.

azinthesun said...

If my memory serves me correctly, this song was playing when Shane fucked Cheri (by the pool?) in TLW. It was the first time I heard that song and immediately DLed it. The guitar is guttural and raw. Many awesome songs and music from that show. Kinnie Starr's "Alright" and Joseph Arthur's "In The Sun" come to mind.Joan Armatrading's "The Weakness in Me". Awesome song! God, I am becoming so nostalgic.

Shasta said...

Oh man, I first found that song by accident, thinking I'd found some Lilith Fair live performance. I was listening with the volume down low and had to stop and rewind. "Wait, what??" And the realization that it was a woman singing about a woman followed pretty quickly and oh my.... Best song ever! That live video is just delightful. The woman is sexy and hilarious.
Hearing that song on NPR would be awesome. In a car with parents? Not so much!

Kiwi said...

Oh good lord....thats pretty much all one can say...

Anonymous said...

There should have been a massive NSFW sign on this post! I can't keep a straight face and this embarrassing blush i'm having now.. geezzz!

Anonymous said...

Awesome. I heart MF. She's just flat out awesome. Her voice gives me 'goose bumps', and damn -- I'm a little moist now. I give it a 10+!!


J9 said...

um, uh, THUD! Oh HOLY CRAP! Really good timing after having read a TON of RandI fem slash this weekend. Now I have a sound track to go with it. unh.

J9 said...

And OMFG - I may actually be in love with Melissa Ferrick after that live performance of Drive. Wow. And now off to download...

Anna said...

azinthesun, you're thinking of Esthero - I Drive Alone. :) But close! You can find it here:

Maria said...

Oh my god, where have I been that I didn't know Melissa? I love her now -- and the song, the sexiest indeed!

Thanks for introducing us! Ms. Snarker. :)