Saturday, March 08, 2008

Pre-L: Lifecycle

L510: “Lifecycle”
Talk about your Dykes on Bikes. What better place to exorcise one’s long-gestating demons than on 200 miles of asphalt? I mean that for both the characters and the creators. Oh, Mama Chaiken, now you come up with the moving tribute to Dana? Now? I guess better late than never. Sorry, what? No, I wasn’t crying. I had something in my eye. Really. Truly. Now, pass the Kleenex.

1) Under the pink, Subaru Pink Ride, that is.2) Wow, Tasha had other friends besides Papi?3) Shameless Self Promotion: Meta Edition.4) Look who needs a bicycle built for two.5) Involuntary response to “Did you and Jenny ever hook up?”6) Lesbianism, not exactly like riding a bike.7) So, why not learn from the Tour de Gay champ?8) Activate……Kleenex.9) The Mikes on Bikes contingent has arrived.10) Kit has to celebrate screen time any way she can.11) Mind your shoes.12) Big kiss to you!13) Which of these camp couples is not like the other?14) Welcome to the Taj MaAdele.15) Costco: a good place to buy a 20-pound jar of mayonnaise, a not-so-good place to buy a tent.16) How about a side of guilt with that hug?17) You’re secretly diabolical? No way!18) In lieu of more lines, Kit got more headgear.19) Getting used to this whole civilian thing, eh?20) I see London, I see France, Take 221) Molly joins the ranks of us cunning-linguists. Ahem.22) The gift that keeps on giving.23) Behold the rare lesbian unicorn in her natural habitat.24) $20 says this will come back to haunt them.25) This is……quite possibly……the most strap-on action……ever on American TV……I approve.26) That shit……is creepy.27) Wait, make it $100.28) Campfire “I Never?” Sure, what could go wrong?29) What is cheating? That depends on what the definition of is is.30) This is precisely why I never play “I Never.”31) Somebody owes me $100.32) Cheaters never prosper.
New Guestbian Count: 2
[Jasmine Lukuku as Nicole and Camille Atebe as T, the Coco Girls]
Best Line: “I know that I’m still Gay 101 but I’m a really fast learner. And before you know it I’m going to be Advanced Placement Gay and then Graduate-Level Gay. And fuck Law School, I’ll get my doctorate in fucking gay.” -- Molly to Shane
Best Tip: “Breathe through your mouth.” -- Shane to Molly
Understatement of the Year I: “She’s kind of OCD.” -- Tina about Bette
Understatement of the Year II: “Do you know that my friends think I’m out of my mind...” -- Jenny to Nikki
Understatement of the Year III: “You guys, you belong together.” -- Alice to Tina about Bette

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pre-L...I wish I could quit you! Thanks, Ms. S.

Anonymous said...

"Taj MaAdele"
God, you're killing me!!
I just can't stop laughing.

Thank you so much for the Pre-L.

Heather Anne Hogan said...

You've outdone yourself this week with the captions. I laughed out loud. "You’re secretly diabolical?" "No way!"

Anonymous said...

Thank you MS. Dorothy. for another great pre-cap. Katherine Moennig is getting prettier each episode this season. I love the picture where she has her arms wrapped around Clementine and big old smile. Maybe, it's because they let Shane smile this season that KM looks so good?

Bette is singing Trouble set me free this episode!

Anonymous said...

:snicker: Girltrash

Oh yea.. the series that had like 3 minute clips, gained momentum and then prompty killed itself because it got too high on itself and now has 0 momentum??

I love your pre's and congrats on the award!!

Anonymous said...

Bette/JB looks gorgeous in this epi!!!!Her hair and Bette in her bike clothes mmm yummy!
Thxs for the pics!!!
Creepy Adele!

Anonymous said...

could somebody explain the "I see London, I see Paris" joke? Please
Thx.
Congrats for the award.
Thanks for the pre-L, so funny.

Anonymous said...

awwww tasha and alice are so freakin great & cute together! thanks for the screencaps!

Natazzz said...

This is the best L word season ever...

Anonymous said...

Oh god, they even remembered that Dana existed. Is there anything Season 5 of The L Word can't do?

Team Dana! I'm actually tearing up. Regardless of all the things Mama Chaiken's got wrong, she's created the only character on tv that has ever sent me into mourning. It's not right, but it's beautiful.

I'm really going to miss this show when it's gone.

Anonymous said...

Lovin' the Pre-L! You make my weekend so much brighter. Can't help myself, I love a spoiler!

Thanks for posting.

Anonymous said...

Dorothy,

Elka and KC said there will be a season six. It will have eight episodes. This means you can also win the award next year.

Anonymous said...

these pre-L's are the highlight of my week. i like the better than the actual episode. one thing from last week though and out of all the pre caps and recaps and comments, nobody mentioned that when bette got out the elevator her blouse was buttoned incorrectly.

Anonymous said...

HA - "the definition of is is" - so clever. You never disappoint.

tallbubba said...

Did they not do this whole bike riding thing on QaF?

Anonymous said...

Between the fantastic Pre-L and the fantastic Post-L Vlog "We're Getting Nowhere" over at AfterEllen... I almost don't even have to watch the show, as both the pre and post stuff is way better (than again I still can't help myself and still watch anyway).

I agree with heather! anne! you did indeed outdo yourself with the captions.

Anonymous said...

anonymous #4:
I assume you're not from the U.S. because it's a pretty widespread little rhyme that kids say. it goes, "i see london, i see france, i see becky's underpants." and then the surrounding group commences the giggling. I'll admit, i use to pants them and then say it.

Anonymous said...

Hey there Host,

Anon from last year's pre-L readers here. The fool that likes captures of Shane.
We're just catching up on this season via a newsgroup, and your award is well-deserved is the consensus round here. Congratulations!
And the soup-chef here is looking forward to your covering a cook show.

My suggestion for an alternative caption to screenshot number 32:

"Fuck you, Chaiken. Give Bette a public self-outing as a sleaze-bag baby-guts? And then you expect me to find something to bring to backing up in the next ep. as if she hasn't gone doolally?"

regards, Anon from Oz - - where we totally used to play skipping games of "I see London, I see France", as well as "Charlie Chaplin went to France, to teach the ladies how to dance. First they did the ..."

Anonymous said...

God, I love you. So effing hilarious.

Unknown said...

I was so excited about the strap-on scene! It's about time they added some strap-on goodness to the show (and Dana and Alice don't really count because it was nowhere near as graphic and obvious as Jenny and Nikki were)!

Though I must admit, a camping trip seems like an odd place to bestow the gift of a strap-on to your lover.

Anonymous said...

I'm here late, but as usual I love your comments, funniest blog!!!

Sinsational Shasta! said...

Your captions are brilliant.

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