Grace notes

Hey, did you know Holly Hunter was back on TV? You might have missed it, what with TNT being all mysteriously hush-hush about it returning for four new episodes this month. [Thanks for the reminder, Dame Rhetorica!] “Saving Grace” is back and came in like a hurricane. Sorry, make that a tornado. I can’t say last night’s episode was my favorite. The God works in mysterious ways metaphor was a little, make that a lot, heavy handed and the story felt disjointed. Grace is working on a case about a bus crash that killed several children when a twister came and tore her investigation asunder. And then she tries to save a woman trapped in the wreckage from the storm named Dorothy (played by Mary Kay Place, see you knew you recognized her). Things didn’t work out so well, but still, I had to chuckle. This makes the second show I’m watching that involved tornadoes and a character called Dorothy. Is the universe trying to tell me something?

Regardless last night’s overly divine intervention, I’m going to check remaining three episodes of “Saving Grace,” if for nothing else the magnificent Ms. Hunter. The series is an excellent showcase of her spectacular talents. [Click to enlarge, y’all.]

Like say, her cop arms:And her riding skills:And her pool prowess:And her all-around adorableness:Plus, does anyone else look at Holly and Laura San Giacomo and get an acute case of Wishful Lesbian Thinking?Oh, and, just in case that wasn’t enough to get you watching, how about these shots? Hey, that girl looks familiar.Catch Erin Daniels on the show Dec. 17. Now if only there was some way her character could go out for drinks with Grace and then one thing leads to another and, what do you know, handcuffs.

Smile, you’re on L Word camera

Hey, who wants to see the first official promo stills from season 5? Oh, Alice, of course you would. Now, not all the players are present yet, but patience kittens, patience. They are coming. A sneak peek, with appropriately snarky commentary…of course. [Click ’em to enlarge ’em.]

Shane’s been working on her fitness. I approve. She’s also been working on her hairdo. I do not approve.Jesus, ladies, what is up with the hair? Jodi, put down the crimper. Put it down and step away slowly. Let’s end this thing peacefully.Ahh, much better. Looks like cooler, less crimped heads prevailed. Carry on.Max has mastered computers and video? Next thing you know he’ll discover a little thing called the YouTubes.Kit and Phyllis? What could those two be talking about? Their tragically nonsensical storylines?Oh no, trouble in Alice and Tasha land? Say it ain’t so.Ahh, much better. Don’t scare me like that.Alice and Tina, I know exactly how you feel. I get cranky and anxious when I haven’t seen Bette in a while, too.p.s. Showtime is promoing the hell out of this lesbian Turkish oil wrestling stuff. Though, really, can you blame them? Not too much new in the latest previews, except for this.And, well, this.Who else needs an icepack?

My Weekend Crush

How delicious is Vanessa Williams? As Wilhelmina Slater, she is so divaliciously devious, you almost forget what a staggeringly stunning woman she is. Plus, no one works an eyebrow arch harder. In less than two seasons she has made the evil editrix extraordinaire a classic comedy character for the ages. Fabulous. Fierce. Fearsome. And while we all love the malevolent scheming, every now and then she shows a little heart. For a second. OK, make that a spilt second. And talk about your comebacks. After being forced to resign her 1984 Miss America crown is disgrace when nude photos of her appeared in Penthouse, Vanessa has gone on to be probably the most famous and successful of all the pageant’s past contestants. So, uh, suck it prudes. Also, does anyone else take secret delight in the fact that her racy shots were with another woman? (NSFW, ‘natch.) Insert patented Wilhelmina eyebrow raise here. Happy weekend, all.

Tina Fey Friday

Tina Fey, oh, Tina Fey. My crush on you is so big it’s starting to worry the neighbors and scare the cat. In last night’s episode of “30 Rock,” when Jack described Liz’s night as “meatball sub with extra bread, bottle of NyQuil, TiVo Top Chef” I nearly fell off the couch. If that’s not a perfect evening, then what is? OK, maybe minus the NyQuil. I prefer a nice vodka cran (a drink with the added benefit of helping to ward off UTIs…I’m all about cocktails with a cause). But I digress.

Tina is the awesome. Funny. Smart. Principled. Nerdy. Oh, and sexy. Super sexy. To which she would probably respond, “What? Sexy? You are. Shut up.” Each week I let out what can only accurately be called squeals of delight while watching Liz Lemon bring the hilarious with her awkward everygirl charm. Heck, I could start a whole site just devoted to the show’s one-liners alone (but don’t worry, I won’t). Add in Tina’s gay-positive attitude, bi-curious shoes and all-around winsome dorkiness and, well, you can see why I’m such an embarrassingly smitten kitten.

p.s. My favorite Liz line from last night: “You can’t be gay for one person…unless you’re a lady, and you meet Ellen.”

Two great things that go great together

Dolly Parton and Amy Sedaris? Together? In a country music video? Girl, that’s two kinds of crazy. Or is it? Is it crazy like a fox? Foxy ladies, that is. Actually, the more I think about it, the more this odd-couple coupling makes sense. Both ladies are hilarious. Both ladies are spunky. Both ladies are unique. And both ladies appreciate a good rack, err, of lamb. Ahem.

In the video for “Better Get To Livin’,” Amy plays three characters in a female-empowerment carnival of sorts with Dolly as ringmaster. The video’s director told amysedarisrocks.com that the collaboration happened because of a monkey. Isn’t it always because of a monkey?

“I suggested (Amy) to Dolly and her team, and they thought it was a great idea. Next thing you know, we approached Amy and she said ‘yes.’ It was the promise that Amy would share a scene with a monkey, and of course, Dolly, that sealed the deal.”

Now you know I love me some Dolly. And I adore me some Amy. So to me this pairing is nothing short of awesome. Heck, I even like the song. Better get to livin’, indeed.

Pre-pre-L: Warming up

The sudden stream of new promos for “The L Word” reminds me that I’m going to have to start stretching my pre-capping muscles again. Yep, 39 days to get back in shape until the Pre-L madness. I think I’ll practice on the latest trailer for season five. The new two-minute spot gives us the most in-depth glimpse of the season’s storyline to date. So without further ado, how about a warm up for Jan. 6? I’m rusty, so bear with me. [Click any to enlarge.]

1) Bette/Jodi/Tina: Two is company, three is dyke drama.2) Alice/Tasha: Don’t ask, don’t tell, don’t ruin the cuteness.3) Jenny: Wrestling in oil, directing movies, escaping from dingys. Just call her McLesbiver.4) Helena/Prison Daddy: Don’t drop the soap...or do, depending on what you’re into.5) Shane: Who here likes the ladies?

And some rhetoricals, just for fun:

How gay is Tasha’s military prosecutor?How ungay is this man?How hilarious is their prison advice?How much sex can you handle?(Note: Check out the hair color on Bette’s, uhm, friend above. I don’t think that’s Jodi. Tibetters, commence going crazy).

p.s. I left Kit out because it’s just too sad. Last season she was a drunk. This season she’s a victim. Well, at least she gets a gun.
p.p.s. And one last shot of Alice, just because I can.

Poster me this

So, who here is good with The Photoshop? Fox, home of “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles” (Aside: dude, could you have picked a longer, more cumbersome name? End of aside), is holding a poster contest with a grand prize of a trip to Los Angeles to attend the show’s premiere party. But, really, I could care less about that contest. Instead, I propose we hold our own little contest, right here. We’ve already seen the lesbian daydream potential when you put Lena Headey and Summer Glau together. Now, we’ve got hi-res (super-duper hi-res -- the damn tiffs took forever to download) cutouts of the lovely ladies at our disposal. So, who wants to make some “Terminator: The Lesbian Chronicles” posters? I whipped up a couple quick, crude couplings. [Click any to enlarge.] But, really, in more skilled hands the possibilities are endless. The official contest rules say no pornographic or sexually explicit content. But, clearly, that’s not an issue here. So, who is game? I’d be happy to post the results for everyone’s viewing pleasure. Bring on “L2: Rise of the Lesbians.”

UPDATE: It’s official, Ida is my hero. Oh, the hotness. [Click to enlarge, it is so worth it.]

Like a deer caught in headlights

I’ve never been more frightened by breasts in my life. Ever. It’s like a stick-up gone horribly awry. Look Heidi, you can have my wallet and my watch. Really, take whatever you want. Just, please, put those things away before someone gets hurt.

My Weekend Crush

How cute is Kristin Chenoweth? So cute that in this week’s episode when she brandished a knife while threatening “Don’t make me cut a bitch!” I think I actually squealed. Out loud. Like a little girl. Since I’m on the wrong coast to be a big Broadway fan, I had never experienced Kristin at length before “Pushing Daisies.” In fact the most I knew about her was from “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip,” where the character of Harriet Hayes (played by the equally brilliant, not to mention gay, Sarah Paulson) was based on her. On Daisies, Kristin’s Olive Snook is so disarmingly adorable you can’t help but fall in love. She is pocket-sized perfection -- pretty, petite, perky. Plus, she tends to wear low cut tops. Hey, I’m only human.

Now normally I don’t go for the overly perky type. Kelly Ripa and company are high on my list of people I’d never want to get stuck in an elevator with. But with Kristin, underneath the perky is untold depth. In a few episodes she has turned the cheerily love struck Olive into a rich, not to mention hilarious, character. And from everything I’ve read and seen about the woman herself, she is just as delightfully kooky and charming. OK, sure, she recorded a Christian album and there was that unfortunate “700 Club” club appearance. But she later apologized and called Pat Robertson and his ilk “scary.” She has been unquestionably great to her large gay fan base and fully supports gay marriage. I mean, a woman who names her dog after Madeline Kahn could never be all bad. And I haven’t even gotten to her voice. Sweet Lord, her voice. And at 4 foot 11 she is finally a woman I could tower over. OK, fine, “tower” may be an overstatement. Happy weekend, all.

Lesbian. Oil. Wrestling.

This is wrong. This is very wrong. This is “Girls Gone Wild”-level wrong. I object. I object vehemently. I obj… uh… uhm… so... oily... Crap. How many days until January 6, again?

Slice me off a piece of that

You know, I’ve always really liked Helena Bonham Carter. From the first time I saw her porcelain perfection in “A Room With a View,” I knew I was in for a lifetime of adoration. OK, sure, she has had an unfortunate habit of absconding with her married directors. And, yes, she can on occasion don some questionable attire. But it’s her endlessly fascinating face that keeps me mesmerized. So I’m intrigued to see how “Sweeney Todd” turns out. Really, the entire cast is pretty awesome -- Johnny Depp, Alan Rickman, Anthony Head . And Tim Burton, well, he may not always make his dark fantastical visions work, but he is always -- at the very least -- interesting. And you’ve got to admire the crazy cojones on a guy who makes a murderous movie musical with the release date of Christmas. So now, just in time for Thanksgiving, bring on the meat pie!

[Click any to enlarge, plus the poster.]

Have a happy turkey day, all. Though if Mrs. Lovett offers you a slice of her specialty Thursday, just say no. Trust me on this.