Wednesday, September 19, 2018

SGALGG: Emmys Edition

Go Emmys, it’s your SGALGG Day. Go Emmys, it’s your SGALGG Day. Look, sometimes I run out of smart things to say. But, luckily, not out of things to show you. So here, without further ado-ing, your 2018 Emmy Straight Gals Acting Like Gay Gals.

Rachel Brosnahan Claire Foy, Tiffany Haddish & Angela Bassett

Is it just me, or does this look like Tiffany and Angela are inviting Rachel* to the most amazing threesome ever?

*Damn, Rachel and Claire were both working that short, slicked back brunette thing so from the side I sleepily mistook them. So they should probably make it a foursome is all I am saying.

Sandra Oh & Jessica Biel

Look out, Justin. Sandra is clearly explaining to Jessica the benefits of falling in obsessive love with a beautiful psychopathic assassin.

Amanda Crew & Suzanne Cryer

This feels like what Sporty Spice would wear to the Emmys if she came out and started dating Posh.

Angela Sarafyan & Stefani Robinson

Because I don’t know why Angela from “Westworld” and Stefani with “Atlanta” are posing together I’ll just assume it is because they are dating. Please don’t tell me otherwise.

Nina Kiri & Madeline Brewer

When you see your girlfriend on the red carpet looking super hot and neither of you are in Gilead.

Millie Bobbie Brown & Emilia Clarke

Fine, so Eleven and Daenerys aren’t doing anything particularly gay together. But both their characters project Big Dyke Energy, so there’s that.

Alex Borstein & Her Emmy

I mean, performing cunnilingus in public on your Emmy is also a pretty B.D.E. move.

Laurie Metcalf & Alex Borstein

Though, I guess Laurie Metcalf checking out your rack in front of everyone has a confidence boosting effect.

Chrissy Teigen & Gina Rodriguez

The moment you realize how great it feels to press your whole lady body against another whole lady body.

And now time for a brand new segment called “Straight Girls Acting Like Gay Gals With Sarah Paulson” or SGALGGWSP.

Sarah & Connie Britton

Connie to Sarah: “Look, we’d be great together in ‘American Horny Story’ is all I’m saying.”

Sarah & Claire Foy

Claire to Sarah: “Look, you’re the Supreme. I’m the Queen. We could really make this work.”

Sarah & Felicity Huffman

Felicity to Sarah: “Look, I’m not saying I’d do anything for you. But I was on a show with ‘Desperate’ in the title.”

Sarah & Jessica Biel

Jessica to Sarah: “Look, I’m really the one in the family who knows how to rock a body – if you know what I mean.”

Sarah & Holland

Holland to Sarah: “Look at those poor dears, like they ever had a chance.”

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

That first shot, the woman in the red, that's Rachel Brosnahan.

Carmen SanDiego said...

You’re spot on about Amanda Crew & Suzanne Cryer
And I loved the Sarah Paulson addition