Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Serial swearer

Sweet Mary mother of fuck, I’m totally addicted to “Dexter.” Like I am a metric fuck-ton in love with that show. I know, I know – I’m terribly late. I just never thought I’d get sucked into a show with a serial killer as the hero. Still I gorged myself on its homicidal charms all weekend and have been catching up chronologically when I can all week. And why, might you ask, have I fallen so severed head over heels for this show? Deb fucking Morgan, that’s fucking why.

Seriously, where the fuck has she been all of my life? Why did nobody fucking tell me? Wait, you probably did fucking tell me and I just didn’t bother to fucking listen. Well fuck me twice on Sunday, I was a goddamned idiot. She is TV’s most deliciously foul-mouthed badass. And a totally hottie to boot. There’s just something about the combination of her trucker vocabulary combined with her intellect, instinct and a incredibly smoking physique that have me melt. I mean, fuck balls, those abs.

Come on, that’s like Lesbian Dreamboat Material 101. But, really, why isn’t Deb a lesbian? She’s not had super great luck with the fellas. Like, for instance, she has earned her “I dated a serial killer, ask me how” button. And her other mannerisms are tomboyish, to say the least. So, when will Deb figure it out? Of course, she may not be quite as good at mastering the obvious as we thought – I mean, her brother is Dexter. But, come fucking on, you know her entire closet must just be man boots and plaid fitted button-ups – the whole damn thing.

I will confess to cheating a little with this show. I got the screeners for the first three episodes of season 6 and, on whim over the weekend, popped them in. Now, I’m hooked and am going back to watch from the beginning (mid-way through Season 2 now - hello, Jaime Murray, hello very much). I know a few of the big spoilers through the seasons already (like Rita, poor Rita). But it is quite interesting to begin with where Deb is now and then go backwards to where she started. Now that’s an evolution. She’s always been good, but never quite so confident. And, shit, I think she has even surpassed the unsurpassable cursing goddess Better Porter in creative uses of the word fuck.

Fucking marry me, Deb Morgan. I could not be more fucking serious.


Anonymous said...

"Fuck balls, you're serious?!" You're just getting around to the foul mouthed loveliness of Debra Morgan.

Rachelle said...

Time to say - it's never too late! Fuck yeah, she's genius.
This show is also fucking genius and I feel really bad that you actually know the spoilers...I still believe it will leave you amazed (open-mouthed!)
I couldn't believe when I saw my mother crying over Rita's death, she even felt sick!
"Dexter" is so good and it doesn't stop improving. Season 5 is fucking genius too...

Anonymous said...

Be honest, it was Jaime Murray that made you watch this show. But Jennifer Carpenter is nice eye candy.

_trava said...

I’m totally addicted to your site!)) thank you!
i've just found your last blogiversary post.
I've been reading your blog only for a month and i'm from Moscow, Russia))
haven't seen any comments from Russia((
love Debra, of course!

Beebee said...

Oh boy! What will Tina say when she reads this!

vrgriffith said...

Welcome! Though I wish you hadn't looked ahead. One of the joys of this show is how organic the story arcs evovle and flow. Though sad, Rits's death, just makes so much sense in the scheme of things. And of course, this is where I was introduced to the wonderful talents of Jaime Murray. Fair warning, season 3, IMHO was probably the sketchiest of the five so far. The pacing felt funny and Jimmy Smits' acting seemed forced and over the top.

Can't wait until you see the whole thing. Out of the shows I started watching about the same time-- Fringe, True Blood and Torchwood, this is the only one I stuck with.

It continues to be consistent-- both in acting and writing. It also got stronger with time!

Fuck yeah!

the pants said...

way too skinny and she has a weird captain laguerta is effing caliente!

Anonymous said...

I do love the mouth on that girl, but fucking-A, will somebody please feed her? Too anorexic looking for me. What a messed up family those Morgans are...

Rae said...

I'm with pants on Laguerta, yumm :)

suuuuuuuuuuuuuuu said...

Rachelle, this is my favoutite series!! =D i llove it! and i agree with you.

i also agree with the anon. shes a little too anorexic looking, but she is still hot and sexy! =D

holly fuck!! ahahah

Im gonna keep on dreaming that one day debra will be a lesbian on the show...

egghead said...

I join Russia in saying this is a very fun site.


Anonymous said...

Since you're already spoiled for much bigger things, I'll go ahead and tell you that she makes reference to trying out women while in college. That's all we know, alas. But yeah, I fucking love Deb. She's not really my type romantically, but she's funny as hell.

Actually, I hated Jamie Murray's character, though I adore her as HG on Warehouse 13. In fact, when she first appeared on WH13, I had to keep reminding myself that she wasn't Lila. Thankfully, Murray has sold me on HG, and I've mostly blocked Lila from my memory.

Solo said...

I love Deb looong time. She is such a gay. Series 5 is by far and away the best series and Deb is just epic in it. Jennifer Carpenter turns in a cracking performance. She just needs a sandwich and a malt and it's all gravy.

(P.S. Hi from Blighty!)

Karen said...

Fuck yeah! Dexter is a great series. And Deb Morgan - totally a lesbo. I keep cringing every time they hook her up with some dude. Come on people, get a clue. Nobody screams DYKE more than Ms. Morgan. Love the swearing. And love your pics of her in plaid. Now let's hope they get rid of the Quinn fucker and let Deb date a gal with some real balls. YEAH!

Anonymous said...

YES! Like you said, you may have easily read on through them, but I remember leaving you a bunch of "Watch Dexter, watch Dexter!" comments, along with that same video! XD I am crazy-stoked to see how much you're enjoying it, Debra Fucking Morgan included. <3

Anonymous said...

i got a dorothy cup today.
it's little bit smaller than my usual cup but
will help my diet i think.

the reason the name is dorothy cus
there is a dorothy and her puppy on the cup.
both are looking at somewhere
so I only can see their back side.
don't know what kind of faces they have.

just guessing, smile?
actually the style of drawing is like, they
are looking at kind of disaster.
very seriously.

but i want them
looking at something beautiful.

and smile together.

i will show you the cup someday,
if chances come.

nice day.

Emily said...

Fuck yeah, Debra Morgan!!Dexter is one of my favorite shows, and while I love Michael C. Hall and think he's absolutely amazing (check out Six Feet Under if you haven't already. It's the most brilliant show in the universe), I've always felt like Jennifer Carpenter is a bit of an unsung hero. Her performance as Deb is spot on, and it's about time she gets a damn Emmy nomination or something.

Not to mention, I'm completely envious of her plaid shirt collection. I thought mine was impressive, but it pales in comparison.

Big Shamu said...

About time. And those shirts only work when you have that big-assed belt buckle.
What I love about this character is that she exists. Think about all the other female detectives on tv. Must be pretty, must be feminine, hard edges not allowed. Debra Morgan doesn't care what you think about her and she sure as shit will tell you what she thinks about you but don't get in the way of her solving the crime. I love Dexter and the show wouldn't work nearly as well without Deb but damn I wish we still lived in the time of successful television spin offs because that would be one kickass show.

(oh for fuck's sake, my word ver was permstab. Seriously PERMSTAB??? Karma you crack me up.)

Anonymous said...

My favourite Deb moment (apart from *that* Season 5 Finale moment) is when she finds a really old corpse and it smells so bad she has to throw her clothes away. She's like "Damnit, I reall liked this shirt!" which is funny because it's exactly the same as ALL her shirts.

Patti said...

@ thenoctuary -rofl!

Don't forget this season's "Holy Frankenfuck!"

Anonymous said...

love everything about this girl and this character. She IS my dreamgirl. If only...