My Weekend Non-Crush

Here is the thing about us humans. We’re often bad. We have bad thoughts and bad ideas and bad actions. Literally, no one is perfect. But the other thing about humans is so many of us try to be better.

So when people say they’ve “changed” as a person, sometimes they actually have. But sometimes, they really, really haven’t.

When Kevin Hart was announced as the new Oscar host for the most part I shrugged. He isn’t my brand of comedy, but whatever. We’ve had plenty of mediocre and/or uninspiring Oscar hosts. But then almost immediately after the announcement, when his truly vile past anti-pay tweets emerged, I got annoyed.

And when he issued his “statement” on Instagram that started by saying, “Stop looking for reasons to be negative...Stop searching for reasons to be angry.” I got even more annoyed.

Now, if you aren’t familiar with Kevin Hart’s past anti-gay tweets, all posted less than 10 years ago, here is a sampling. Like I was saying, vile. [Click to embiggen the vileness]



The thing about these tweets is they aren’t just your run-of-the-mill “ha-ha, that’s so gay” throwaways. Sure, that kind of language is not acceptable and should be addressed and corrected. But much of that is more thoughtless than malicious. No, his tweets displayed a deep, deep discomfort and even revulsion with gay identity. The mere thought of someone – heaven forbid his child – being gay makes him resort to talk of violence. So, again, vile.

In his statement/non-apology he say in a shirtless video (because sure, why not, do this kind of thing shirtless):

“Guys. I'm almost 40 years old. If you don’t believe that people change, grow, evolve as they get older, I don’t know what to tell you. If you want to hold people in a position where they always have to justify or explain their past, then do you. I’m the wrong guy, man. I’m in a great place, a great mature place, where all I do is spread positivity.”

Whew. OK, here we go. I am glad you are in a great place, Kevin. You know what LGBTQ people want? To also be in a great place where celebrities do not see our very existence as something to laugh at with obvious disgust. And do you know what is not spreading positivity? Glossing over your past bigotry with weird self platitudes.

So first he posted his weird self-congratulatory video/non-apology. And then later that same day he put up another video on Instagram saying he purposely “passed” on apologizing:

“I passed. The reason I passed is because I’ve addressed this several times. This is not the first time this has come up. Regardless, to the Academy, I’m thankful for the opportunity, if it goes away, no harm, no foul”

And then even later that same day, he – I mean clearly his publicist, posted a tweet that said:

“I have made the choice to step down from hosting this year's Oscar's....this is because I do not want to be a distraction on a night that should be celebrated by so many amazing talented artists. I sincerely apologize to the LGBTQ community for my insensitive words from my past.”

This is as textbook an example of “How Not To Apologize Properly” as you can get. His eventual apology seems hollow. Because, let’s be honest, it is.

Look, people can genuinely evolve. I hope we all do. But to evolve you have to acknowledge past mistakes, apologize for them and show real growth.

So now that we’re short an Oscar host this year, might I suggest – oh I don’t know – a woman? How about Kate McKinnon? Or Wanda Sykes? Or Ellen DeGeneres? Or Tiffany Haddish? Or Tina Fey and Amy Poehler? Or Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer? Or Constance Wu? Or, dream of dreams, Hannah Gadsby?

There are so many amazing choices who would make wonderful Oscar/Gay Super Bowl hosts for next year who are not, you know, homophobic garbage. Happy weekend, all.