Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Bitch, please

What you are about to see is wrong. What you are about to see is very wrong. What you are about to see is very, very wrong. Well, that is, unless you happen to be one of those people who enjoys breasts, nudity, fights, explosions and hot women kissing. With that said, please click play.



OH. MY. GOD. That was awesome, er, I mean wrong. That was incredibly awesome, sorry, I mean terribly sexist. That was totally freaking awesome! Dammit, I mean inexcusably offensive. Shit, who am I kidding? That was fucking genius. That, my friends, was “Bitch Slap.” [Wonderbra snap (in lieu of hat tip), to babsf!]

And, guess what, I haven't even told you the best part. Lucy Lawless and Renee O'Connor appear in cameos as – wait for it, wait for it – nuns! Yes, that's right – Xena and Gabrielle are together again. See what I was saying about genius?

Called a modern-day B-movie exploitation film, “Bitch Slap” comes to us from former producers/directors of “Xena: Warrior Princess” and “Hercules: The Legendary Journeys” (Kevin Sorbo also appears...I'm sensing a trend). They've dubbed it a “feminist, thinking man's, wild and crazy over-the-top exploitation film.” I don't know about all that, but I do know there is a little person who plays a female assassin named “Hot Pocket.”

Look out “Citizen Cane,” you've got serious competition for breast picture of all time. Wait, that came out wrong...

29 comments:

Anonymous said...

If this movie is wrong, I don't want to be right. I am sooo there...

Anonymous said...

You sexist pig! Oink!

What a brilliant, brilliant idea! And Lucy & Reneé! Life is good!

(As if I'm ever going to see this masterpiece...)

Anonymous said...

I'm so proud, I could explode!

;))) babsf

Anonymous said...

Oookaaayyyy...this will sure stir up my Christmas holiday.

Lucy and Renee better be packing heat under those clothes!

B.B.

Tina-cious.com said...

Damn this firewall.

TheWeyrd1 said...

omg...when The Gentleman gets back from vacation she is gonna flip out!!! I did notice some brief, but HOT girl on girl action didn't I? Yes, I did!

rukihime said...

Holy mother of all things lesbian.

I need this film like I need a lesbian in congress.

DESPERATELY.

Jeannine said...

Nor since Adrienne Barbeau in Cannonball Run has boobs, and fast cars gone so well together! My jaw hit the keyboard just on the first shot! Are they handing out plastic seat covers at the theater?

DJ Spinster said...

Sweet baby Jesus, that was f'ing brilliant!

obscur-01 said...

Hot chicks with guns, what could be better?!
Just what I wanted for Xmas....

Lezlie Mac said...

That. Is. So. Wrong.
No, wait. So. Hot...Sweet mother of all things lesbian ! I'd forgotten it was my birthday today !!
That looks like the best movie of the year. It's like Planet Terror with more boobs, or Tomb Raider with girl on girl action (yes theweyrd1, I saw that too...).

Where do I get the poster ??????

rhyfeddu said...

Lucy and Renee - as (naughty?) nuns??? :D Hilarious...and oddly exciting!

(And if my geek-girl eyes don't mislead me, looks like the guy they're beating up on is Micheal Hurst, who played Iolus (sp?) on both Hercules and Xena..)

I don't usually get into the whole Tarantino-retro-purposefully cheesy genre, but may have to check this out...

Shula said...

Thank you for introducing me to this movie. I am eternally grateful. Is it Christmas yet?

Ordy said...

That clip has put a smile on my face. Looks like it has all the elements I love in a movie, hot girls making out, explosions, ass kicking and most importantly Lucy and Renee.

Tina-cious.com said...

Ok. I came back JUST to watch this damn video. lol

All I could think of -- after I stopped drooling of course was...

"I have GOT to get to the gym!!"

Anonymous said...

This movie looks so sweet!

Trihardist said...

EEEEEE!

Oh yes. Merry Christmas, lesbos!

Shasta said...

That was indeed Michael Hurst! I have the weirdest crush on him. I think I'll be forgiven once the doubters go watch the video bit on the BitchSlap site. It's brilliant! "A pervaded miasma of jaded ennui..." *sigh*
This movie looks like candy! Terrible, trashy candy! Or, "tits and guns that make really loud noises". hee! I need a countdown clock for this movie!

Anonymous said...

Can Christmas get here fast enough?

dido h. lecter said...

soooo wrong.

*sigh*

jetgirl said...

heh.

never thought I'd have anything in common with a frat boy.

jennifer from pittsburgh said...

Yowsa! This movie has everything!

cappuccinogirl said...

omg. it's... it's... I'm speechless, and I don't know if it's in a good or a bad way.

IndigoSunMoon said...

If Lucy is there, I'm there!
Connie

jackie said...

Kinda looks like a remake of 'Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!'...

The Big Shamu said...

Christmas???!!!!
I have to wait until DECEMBER???
(I'm really not good at delayed gratification)

ChuChu said...

Fast cars, explosions, and boobies *sigh*

Now, if Lucy would just pull an Uzi out from under her habit, cut loose with the Xena war cry, and level everything within a 100-yard radius I would truly be happy :-D

slacker said...

This look ginormously funny. ROC as Sister Batril. *snort*

(cf. Sally Fields roles, you youngn's)

Deluxx said...

[right click on image]
[set as desktop background]
...and prepare to get slapped.