Thursday, July 22, 2010

Gun it

Now, don’t get me wrong, I liked “Inception.” It was like one of those M.C. Escher paintings from you college dorm room came to life, spun around a dozen times and then spit out that guy from “Titanic” and that gal from “Juno.” Also, who doesn’t love Ellen Page in an assortment of neckerchiefs? But what I really want is a little lady action. Sure Marion Cotillard gets to brandish a weapon here and there. But I crave is the big, bad-ass ladies with even bigger guns. I mean, damn Michelle Rodriguez, damn. So now the only question is, old school or new school? Decisions, decisions.

OLD SCHOOL

Gail DavisAnnie’s got not one, but two guns. As it should be.

Jane FondaWell now, Ms. Ballou, I like the way you point that thing.

Marlene DietrichThis is her just hanging at the shooting range in leather pants.

Pam GrierShe wasn’t called Foxy Brown for nothing.

Audrey HepburnAdmittedly, this is just adorable. I mean, a sun hat – come on.

NEW SCHOOL

Zoe SaldanaModern girls know how to double-fist it, too.

Noomi RapaceNo American version needed, thank you very much.

Milla Jovovich & Ali LarterTwo girls, one shotgun. So much better.

Yvonne StrahovskiIn my dream scenario Agent Sarah Walker and Agent Annie Walker meet and compare, um, guns.

Angelina JolieYes, I know, we already had a lengthy discussion about sodium content this week. But Ebert gave “Salt” four stars, and I want it to do well this weekend. Ladies first, ya know.

So, ladies – old school or new school? Or is it just fun to be schooled, period?

19 comments:

dc said...

Read Ebert's review...nah, still not convinced it's worth seeing.

Anonymous said...

I must be showing my age... could we acknowledge (old school?) Linda Hamilton from Terminator II in her tank top *with* massive gun please? She's the preadolescent prototype against which I appear to gauge all other gals with guns. . .

Urban Jointz said...

Old school or new school... Either or in my view. I could never get tired of a woman with a gun. Yeah!

laurayoong said...

new school... definitely

Mari og Ingvild said...

I totally agree!!! Theres NO NEED for an american version........ the swedish one was EXCELLENT and i think its kinda pointless to make a stupid american version just because people from english speaking countries rarely watch foreign films. The author was swedish, the story takes place in sweden, the film SHOULD BE IN SWEDISH. stop stealing our stuff, america.

Emma said...

You know, they've narrowed the Salander auditions down to five actresses (all of whom are relative no namers, which I think is for the best) and the director has actually asked them to start practicing their swedish accents. Like, Salander will still be from sweden.

NOOMI RAPACE SPEAKS FLUENT ENGLISH WITH A REAL SWEDISH ACCENT, YOU MORONS.

This makes me worry that they're not trying to change the setting, they want to change the character. I want my butch Lisbeth! Grr.

fallon_ash said...

I spent the morning watching Firefly. Now Gina Torres handles a gun *very* well. Yes, please.

Anonymous said...

Wow. I guess I'm in the minority here, but for me this page just goes to prove that nothing can take beauty and turn it ugly faster than putting a gun in someone's hand.

Anonymous said...

Definitely New School!

Anonymous said...

Where's Mariska Hargitay in SVU? Where's Joan Crawford from Johnny Guitar? Where's Barbara Stanwyck in any number of Westerns and Film Noirs? And where's the delectable Diana Rigg as Mrs. Peel? Huh? And explain to me why I have to choose between Olde and New School when movie magic lets me feast on them all?

TheWeyrd1 said...

Real girls with real guns...no so sexy. Just kinda scary. Reel girls with reel guns...that's a fun fantasy!

Making Space said...

Ripley and Sarah Connor. Nuff sed.

Norma Desmond said...

You know me, I'm old school all the way.

vrgriffith said...

Definitely new school-- with the exception of Pam!

FeltHat said...

Wot no Doris Day? how could you - i swear Calamity Jane made me gay!

FeltHat said...

& don't forget Joan Crawford in Johnny Guitar....yep i appreciate me some old school!

cocoro said...

I'd like to call, traditional school.

foreveranonymous7 said...

Mmm... girls with guns. I approve. :D

Also, I have to add Captain Janeway from Star Trek Voyager to the list because of her propensity to carry around the biggest phaser rifle she could find.

http://voy.trekcore.com/gallery/albums/3x12/macrocosm_172.jpg

*shrug* I'm a scifi geek - I think she's sexy. ;)

Anonymous said...

Anyone else see Cec Verrell in Hell Comes to Frogtown? Horrible movie, endured only for the Centinella scenes.

http://groovyheroines.blogspot.com/2008/08/keeping-centinella.html