Monday, January 12, 2009

Yeah, suck it, I did win the Golden Globe

Dear BabsonLacrosse, dianefan and Cougar Letter,

You can suck it. You can totally, totally suck it. You're damn right, I'm taking it personally. No one insults my fake wife (yes, that's right, we've taken our fake relationship to the next level) and gets away with it.

And the fact that you're REAL LIVE INTERNET POSTERS, well, that just means you can suck it even harder. Part of me is just jealous because she took the time to read your posts. But the other part of me is just incensed that even after getting name dropped on national television by Tina fucking Fey, you're still haters.

On the flip side, that she would take the time to mention actual online commenters in her acceptance speech is the polar opposite of what it means to suck it. See, I knew there was a reason I fake proposed and she fake accepted.

Sincerely,
Ms. Snarker

p.s. Also the polar opposite of sucking it: Kate Winslet, Sally Hawkins and Salma Hayek's bossoms

15 comments:

jennifer from pittsburgh said...

That is hilarious! Typical that Fey would name actual hater poster children.

Pyewacket said...

I wanna suck it too!

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Though I suspect we are talking about different things.

:p

;)) babs said...

yay, kate winslet won two!!!

Patty Diphusa said...

Yes! Kate Winslet 2 - Penélope (brrrrr) Cruz 0. Saludos desde España!!

linster said...

But see, this is only one degree from thanking those who write repeatedly about how much we love her and think she deserves to be queen of the universe. And then she will ask those people to come be her love slaves.

flamethrower said...

i LOVE real people!! TF is just keepin it real!

Annie said...

Niiice! I love that Tina named actual internet haters - was one of the best highlights of the evening! That and Kate Winslet's wins(and bossoms) had me cheering!

Ms. Snarker, I do hope your fake wife (love that phrase!) reads your blog, but until then, all those who love your hilariously, witty, luscious words will do as well!

Hey, if Tina Fey's your fake wife, then I'll take Lena Headey, Renee O'Connor and Kate Winslet as my fake spouses any day! :D

Amanda said...

God... she needs to stop being so awesome. When will this crush die??! ;)

Amanda

Anonymous said...

Does anyone know why Tracy Morgan mentioned Cate Blanchet by name in his acceptance speech? He said that she could just deal with him being the face of post racial america.

Any thoughts?

Anonymous said...

Didn't that 'suck it' repost first come from an old SNL Republican skit? Will Ferrell said that line then.

BernieB

TechGirl said...

OMG, to think or even bet Tina Fey would not walk off with the Golden Globe was insane. You must be so proud of your "fake wife"! Anyone who doubted her talent didn't watch her SNL skits this past election year. It would have been nice if she mentioned the love your work poster childen.

Long live Tina! I really hope you get to meet her someday.

TheWeyrd1 said...

I just can't decide what's more funny...so I'll just laugh about all of it! Love your wife...I mean that Tina gal!

let me dance said...

?
comeback? (-_-)?

anyway, nice to see you.
i'm good, and yea, good.
i understood some part,
and not pay much attention
some part..cus sleepy.

have a nice weekend.
i'll step by.

Katherine Simon said...

Just so you know, I'm going to have a fake affair with your fake wife. It's going to happen. I apologize in advance... Sorta.

Margo Moon said...

She's MY Tina Faux Fey, and has made me many false promises that any fake marriages I might get wind of are absolutely phony. But on the off chance there's a forged marriage license to back this up, I'm falsifying fake divorce papers as we type.