My Weekend Crush

I will admit that if you asked me a year ago if I knew who Feist was I would have shrugged and shook my head. In fact, it was the always discerning Scribe Grrrl herself who introduced me, and probably more than a few others, to one Leslie Feist. I should really send her a fruit basket or something. Since then, I can’t believe I ever lived in a world where I did not know her voice, a voice so filled with a haunting joy that each time I hear it anew almost makes me gasp.

Feist’s new album “The Reminder” could very well make her a star, with a major assist from the ever-present iPod nano commercial. I swear, every time it comes on I feel like dancing. Good thing I’m usually in my living room. While Feist may hook you with the boisterous buoyancy of “1234,” it’s the simple sadness of songs like “The Park” that will linger along the outskirts of your heart for days. Each time I put on “The Reminder,” I feel as if I’ve been given a gift. Equal parts exalted, beguiling and melancholic, it grows richer with every listen. And, once again, Scribe put it best: “The album does break your heart, in the best way. It makes you want to walk/run/ride/drive in the sun, in the spring, in a place and time where you can take the whole world into your chest and push it back out as music.” Check your doorstep, that fruit basket is coming. Happy weekend, all.

U-Haul not included

Uh, so when did Elton John and k.d. lang become lesbian twinsies? I mean it -- the hair, the jacket -- it’s almost creepy. I’m having some sort of crazed “The Bitch is Back” for “Constant Craving” flashback just looking at these photos.
Also, just because it’s Friday and apropos of nothing, here is Uma Thurman’s cleavage. It kind of takes the sting off the lesbian look-alike thing, doesn’t it? Thank God it’s Friday, indeed.

Top bisexual

How did I not know this? Thanks to my new best friend anonymous, I’ve just learned that my favorite cooking cutie Lia Bardeen is bisexual. And this isn’t just some unsubstantiated rumor. This is straight (uh, wrong word) from the source -- Lia’s home casting video. Gosh, and they say you can’t learn anything from the internet. In the clip, Lia talks about getting out of a six-year relationship eight months ago. When the interviewer asked “How long did you date the guy?“ She replies, “Six years, almost, and it was a girl.” Hell to the yeah! She goes on to say: “I never identified as gay. If someone specifically really needs to know, like, how I identify I would probably say bi. So I just kind of say that I’m attracted to people, not --you know -- what is downstairs.” Man, I knew she pinged my gaydar, I knew it. I think it was the way she drank her beer from the bottle. It, uh, spoke to me. Anyway, after a little research I found this dissection of the photographic clues to Lia’s then-supposed bisexuality at Amuse-Biatch. Yes, the papayas were the dead giveaway. I mean, come on. How could I not have known?
p.s. Is Bravo trying to tell us something again with the typo in the caption. Him? Someone needs to retake sensitivity training.
p.p.s. Casey, Hung and Dale. It should be an awesome finale, no?

Top this

So, “Top Chef” is down to the final four and the two-part finale, set in Aspen, begins tonight. In case you couldn’t tell, I’m rooting for Casey. Now, I like Dale. And Brian is OK (though for the love of Long John Silvers, stop making lobster!). But, basically, I really, really, really, really don’t want Hung to win. That dude is already an insufferable asshat. Just think how bad he would be with a title. While I don’t usually root for someone to lose, I am totally rooting for Hung to get his smug handed to him on a skillet. I think Casey has the best shot at beating Hung, but what the hell do I know; I thought Tre was going to win it all.
Actually, I think the caliber of cooking this season has been better than last. And the cutie chef quotient was pretty good, too. Hello, Lia. How ya doing? Sadly, all my favorites -- Lia, Sara N., Sandee (well, she probably would have been a favorite if she had stuck around for more than two episodes) -- got the cut early. My other complaint this season is that the judging has been wildly inconsistent. Howie fails to plate an item in the very first elimination challenge and he gets to stick around but poor Tre just makes boring bread pudding and it’s pack your knives and leave? At least we still have Padma to soothe our disappointments. And Padma with a lasso? That’s just the icing on the cake. Bon appétit.

Lesbians prefer blondes

Look, twinsies! The first shot of new Nip/Tuck couple Portia de Rossi and Joely Richardson has been released by FX. (Click to enlarge.) They look so happy. They look so healthy. They look so on the verge of being the victims of a horrible, horrible hate crime. Oh wait, sorry, that’s just me reading too much into the body language. Actually, Portia is totally giving Joely a naughty “Just wait until I get you home and into bed, missy -- you’re in big trouble!”-look. I’ll bet she’s doing mental calculations on how many moves it will take to undo Joely’s bra. It’s like “Name That Tune,” but much more fun. “I can undo that bra in three moves!”With Joely’s character Julia lesboing up, this mean Roma Maffia’s character Dr. Liz Cruz will have some lady-loving competition this season. I’ll admit, I haven’t watch Nip/Tuck regularly in quite a while. The whole Carver thing along with assorted other insane/inane plot points convinced me I could find better ways to spend an hour on Tuesday nights. I probably won’t watch regularly this season either. But, I do plan to tune in for the “anything but tame” hot lesbian sex Joely and Portia will be having, however short the afterglow ends up being. Also, I had no idea Lauren Hutton was on this show, did you? Oh, wait, she appears to be a new character. Wow, she looks great. Damn, it’s like FX is taunting me with all this beauty, daring me to start watching again. Must. Resist. Must... Fine, I’m programming it in. But I swear I’m just going to skip to the good parts.

The not-so-Lezzie Bunch

Marcia and Jan did not make out. Oh, thank God. You know when you read something and immediately wish you hadn’t because the image then seared itself onto your brain and you can never again look back in innocence and wonder at something that was once an important part of your childhood. Yeah, well, that’s exactly what happened when news broke on the blogs Friday that Marcia, sorry, Maureen McCormick was going to reveal in her new autobiography that she and Jan, er, Eve Plumb had fooled around behind the scenes on “The Brady Bunch.” The horror! The abject horror! But, just as fast as the “My eyes! Dear God, my eye!”-mental images was born, it was swiftly killed when Maureen’s publisher denied the claims of Brady lesbianism.

“We are verifying that it is not true,” said Debbie Styer, senior vice president of group publicity at William Morrow, publisher of her book “Here’s the Story…” “The real story of what happened in [McCormick’s] life and behind the scenes of the show will all come out when the book comes out.”

Whewww. Look, in theory I have nothing against attractive people getting it on. But in practice, this would have meant that every time I heard “Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!” I was going to envision a very different, very sweaty scenario. So. Very. Wrong. Already the news had me experiencing post-traumatic stress syndrome flashbacks to the first time I watched “Sister My Sister” and sat open-mouthed through all the insanely inappropriate yet freakishly hot sister-on-sister action. That film needs a disclaimer that says, “Warning: May cause scarring for life.”

I guess what this non-story really reaffirms is that, gasp, you can’t believe everything you read on the internet. I know, shocking. Actually, I was immediately skeptical of this report when I saw that its source was the ever-disreputable ContactMusic.com. These are the same folks who spun Leisha Hailey’s cute comments about her AfterEllen Hot 100 list supremacy into a frightened feud with Angelina Jolie. In short, take everything they say with a grain of salt. I like mine on a margarita.

My Weekend Crush

I know, I know. Three posts on Holly Hunter in one week. I’m testing the patience of everyone here who does not have a thing for smart Southerners. Or women who talk endearing out of the sides of their mouths. Or women whose bodies are all sinew and steel. Or women who don’t mind getting handcuffed naked to beds. Me, I love all those qualities. A lot. I’ve been a fan of Holly’s since, as a young movie-going neophyte, I first saw her in that paradigm-shifting comedy “Raising Arizona” some 20 years ago. I distinctly remember leaving the theater and thinking, “Wow, what the hell was that? I liked it.” Since then she has been so good at what she does, that we have been lulled into thinking we know her. Her work seems less like acting and more like just her. Spunky. Funny. Tough. Every so slightly neurotic. But, then, that’s what the best actors do. They make us believe they are their roles. If I stop to think about it, I know very little about Holly Hunter the person. Her private life is just that. Which is how it should be. Holly does her talking on screen. And on screen, she is fearless. Still of all of her on-camera qualities, I have to believe that one is true even when they stop rolling. Happy weekend, all.

Politics most personal

Hopefully you’ve already seen and been buoyed by this inspiring video. And if not, well, be prepared for something rare and wonderful. As Sarah posted at AfterEllen.com yesterday, San Diego’s Republican Mayor Jerry Sanders announced earlier this week that he was reversing his previously-announced decision to veto a gay marriage resolution. He said he did so because he could not look into the face of his gay daughter, Lisa, or his gay staff members and “tell them that their relationship -- their very lives -- were any less meaningful than the marriage I share with my wife Rana.” (Read the full transcript at Wockner.)
Mayor Sanders (pictured above with his daughter Lisa at his 2005 swearing-in ceremony) said he realized the gay marriage vs. civil unions debate is, ultimately, a lie. There is no such thing as separate but equal. There is only separate or equal. It is a decision that will no doubt anger his conservative constituents. But it is a reminder that doing what is right isn’t always a popular. But sometimes, as he said, you have to lead with your heart.

This is also a reminder that what changes peoples’ minds isn’t necessarily the public discourse, but the private heart-to-hearts. I’ve always thought the marches and parade and protests -- while great -- were something done perhaps more for us than for them. They’re an affirmation that we aren’t the only ones shaking our fists at the injustice. While that is invaluable to our collective spirit, I don’t think it’s what moves people outside of our bubble.

Instead, this is how the world changes. Not through loud marches and big speeches. But through the small, quiet moments of our conscience. It is the mother or father, daughter or son, sister or brother, neighbor or friend, who you know who gives a face and a beating heart to these issues we talk about in the abstract like equality and justice, hatred and bigotry.

This is why it’s all the more baffling that there are countless others who - like Mayor Sanders - find their public policy at odds with their personal experiences, yet do nothing to rectify the imbalance. Are you listening Dick Cheney? How can your heart live with what your head does to your daughter? How can you sleep knowing the policies you push declare her life less worth protecting than every other citizen. The conscience is a powerful thing. Someday - like Mayor Sanders - may you finally find yours.p.s. If you want to thank Mayor Sanders, email him at jerrysanders@sandiego.gov. If you want to tell Gov. Schwarzenegger to look into his own heart and not veto a similar piece of legislation coming though the legislature, do so here. If you want to tell Dick Cheney to go to hell, well, get in line.

UPDATE: OK, so Wockner has Lisa Sander’s first, and possibly only, public comment on her dad’s courageous decision:

“I'm just very proud of my father. And to be a part of this. It's about equality, and he's doing the right thing, and I'm very confident in him.”

Also, he has photos. Let me be the first to say, “Hello, hottie!” Power suits, they get me ever. single. time.

Smile pretty

Warning: NSFW. In fact, I should have called it Naked Lady Thursday. Or, more precisely, Holly Hunter Hotness. Anyway, my point is that if you scroll down with bosses/teachers/parents/ anyone who does not appreciate the nude female form on a computer screen nearby, there could be trouble. Moving on.

So, the television gods smiled on me and I received this week’s “Saving Grace” episode yesterday. You know what that means? Holly Hunter naked screencaps! I know, I know. I am a cheeky monkey. I never claimed to be above prurient interests. I also never claimed to be above drooling. So with that, I’ll just shut up and let Holly’s exquisitely toned form (I mean it, I don’t think she had enough body fat to make a pat of butter) do the rest of the talking. Did I mention you can catch the encore tonight on TNT? (Click to enlarge the hotness, I won’t tell anyone.)

p.s. Check out Dame Rhetorica’s thoughtful list of reasons why we should all watch “Saving Grace.” Damn, I wish I had read that before this week. I might have clued in a lot sooner.

Emmy afterthoughts

So, Tina Fey, congratulations on your big Emmy win! But now, big problem, how will you get it home? The answer: bubble wrap. I just love these shots of Tina totting her wrapped-up pointy prize home with her. I also love how she handles her own bag. And her Chucks. And her just about everything. Plus seeing her put her Emmy in the airport security bin? Absolutely priceless.I also realized I forgot to post shots of Emmy night’s big gay couples. Version Lesbian: Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi. Version Gay: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka. (Click to enlarge the cuteness.) Say it with me, Awwwwww!And, finally, one last WTF about the bizarre Fox censors. Sure, they are denying that bleeping Sally Field’s “goddamn wars” comment was politically motivated (sure, Rupert Murdoch, sure), but the latest about the Ray Romano “screwing my wife”-bleepage is that they cut it for fear of spoiling a plot point on the network’s new series “Back to You.” Yep, that sounds about right. But regardless the reasoning, the Fox censors were hopelessly inept, period. Instead of calmly bleeping out each (supposedly) offensive statement, they cut for several seconds to a truly puzzling, soundless aerial shot of the auditorium that left everyone watching at home thinking, “Damn, has someone fallen asleep at the controls?” Next year, perhaps another network, m’kay?

See Jane Review

Hey folks, I reviewed “The Jane Austen Book Club” at AfterEllen.com today. If you’re so inclined, check it out. Otherwise my two word review: pleasantly predictable.

I’m a believer

Hello? [Tap, tap] This thing on? [Crickets] Wow, not into Kate’s bum self-portrait I guess. Hmm, well how about Holly Hunter’s real-life bum? I must admit, I haven’t exactly been following “Saving Grace.” While I love Holly Hunter, I wasn’t terribly impressed by the pilot or its touched-by-a-good-ol’-boy-angel premise, and skipped it in favor of the razor-sharp moral jigsaw of “Damages.” (Not that they’re on at the same time, but I can only add so many new shows and still get in my required four hours of Food Network each night…I’m kidding…sort of.) Now, people have told me that “Saving Grace” improved considerably after the premiere, but I still wasn’t compelled to give it another go.

But then last night I was flipping channels and, well, Holly Hunter’s ass made me a believer. After last night’s episode it’s safe to say that I’ve been converted. The scene opened with Grace in the midst of a bedroom romp. It ended with her handcuffed to the bedpost, naked as the day she was born. And, yes, we see the full monty. Well, the full backside monty. Thank you TNT, my new favorite network. Sadly, I couldn’t get the technical wizardry together to get you a screencap. But, needless to say, Holly works out. (Catch the repeat at 8 p.m. Thursday on TNT, and don’t tune in late or you’ll miss the best part.)

Actually, the whole episode was quite intriguing. It involved a crime from Grace’s past, murder, redemption, handcuffs, tabouli. What’s not to love? And it reminded me that while I may not be totally sold on the “God has plans for you” concept, a great actress and smart writing can overcome whatever spiritual misgivings one might have. Also, a nice butt shot doesn’t hurt either.

Return of Naked Lady Monday

It’s baaaaack! Today’s lovely is one of the loveliest of the lovelies: Kate Winslet. This is circa -- oh, I don’t know -- a while ago when her hair was shorter. Of course, anyone familiar with Kate’s films has no doubt seen much more, say in “Titanic” or “Holy Smoke” or “Little Children.” But, I think less is more when it comes to NLM. OK, well, maybe just this once I could show you a little bit more. You know, just this once. So, are you ready? I know you’re excited. Here it is. Kate Winslet’s bum.What, not what you were expecting? Look, I wasn’t being, uh, cheeky with you. This is Kate Winslet’s bum, as drawn by Kate Winslet herself. She sketched her posterior as part of the Paint 4 Poverty Celebrity Art Auction. The money raised will go to the Robin Hood Ministries which work to reduce poverty in the world’s poorest countries. Aww, I can tell you’re still disappointed. You could always buy the piece and then tell people you own Kate Winslet’s ass. Come on, at the very least that would be a great way to break the ice at parties.

Ladies night

Every now and then, there is a God.

My Weekend Crush

A perfectly sung song is a thing of perpetual beauty. As I think of my favorite standards, several great ones drift lazily through my mind’s ear. “Stardust.” “Blue Moon.” “What a Wonderful World.” “God Bless the Child.” “Moon River.” Yet, one of my favorites is the unapologetically romantic and unabashedly sentimental “At Last.” Sure, the song has become the go-to first dance at weddings the world over. But you can’t blame quality for creating quantity. The searing single is also one of the most easily associated with one artist: Etta James. The soulful blues diva imbues the simple refrain with a weary joy. This is what longing finally satiated sounds like. This is what love against all odds looks like. While researching this post, I stumbled upon an adorable picture of a lesbian couple at their wedding taking their first dance with Etta. I believe it’s impossible to see that and not have your heart wrap up in clover, just a little bit. Happy weekend, all.

Jodie Foster Friday

I have to say it’s been a fun blogging week. And by “fun,” I mean “hot.” Leisha on Monday. Tina on Tuesday. Bionic Woman on Wednesday. Charlize on Thursday. And I’m all a tingle about today. ’Cause you know what today is, right? Today is my favorite day of the week: Jodie Foster Friday. With the “The Brave One” opening today (read Scribe’s great review here), I thought I’d do an all-out blitz (yes, again…and, again) on the fantastic Ms. Foster’s recent press appearances. (Click on any of the images to enlarge.) But today’s smorgasbord is also bittersweet. As great as it has been to have Jodie open up in print and on television, I know that she will now retreat back into her private cocoon. Now that that she is done doing publicity for the film, as she herself warned us, you can expect a lot less Jodie. Sigh, well, it was great while it lasted. A look back, in wonder.

From the L.A. TimesFrom USA Today

At the New York premiereAt the Toronto premiereFrom C magazineFrom More magazine

And, if that wasn’t enough, check her out on the CBS Early Show here and NPR All Things Considered here. When describing her character in the film, she mentions “this music that is her voice.” Wow, I couldn’t have put it better myself. I’m not sure what I enjoy more: looking at Jodie Foster or listening to Jodie Foster? Good thing I don’t have to choose.

UPDATE: Thanks BonnBonn for the great Charlie Rose link. But did anyone else wish Joel Silver and Neil Jordan weren’t there? Especially Joel, and how he kept calling Jodie’s character “The Girl.” And, since y’all asked so nicely, here is the Daily Show link and the Letterman link. It’s the weekend, go crazy.

It's a bird, it's a plane, it's Charlize

We all know Charlize Theron is hot. It’s just one of those facts, like gravity and that you’ll always pick the stall without toilet paper when you’ve really, really got to go in a public restroom. Still for all her hotness, I wasn’t that interested in her new film “Hancock.” For one thing, the title makes me think of big signatures and/or financial services. And for another thing, Will Smith’s charming-guy, action shtick is wearing a little thin. It’s probably just me and my aversion to perpetually perky people. Damn them and their relentless optimistic attitudes. In the film Will plays a burnt-out, hard-living superhero who starts an affair with his publicist’s wife, played by Charlize. I’ve seen some on-set shots and was generally indifferent. And then, then I saw these pictures.Looks like Will isn’t the only one with some hidden skills. Charlize bench-pressing a semi with one arm? Well, shoot, now I have to see this movie. As yesterday’s post will attest, strong women = super hot. It’s just one of those facts.

Bionic hottie

After seeing these new promo shots for “Bionic Woman” Michelle Ryan, the only things I can say is…

OH.MY.

GOD.

The Return of Tina Fey Tuesday

This Tina Fey American Express ad always makes me smile. Really, everything about Tina Fey makes me smile. OK, not everything. I get a perplexed frown each time I think about how I’m going to watch her show this season. You see, I’m facing a major TV scheduling crisis this fall. Three -- yes, three -- shows I enjoy will play between 8-9 p.m. Thursdays: “30 Rock“ (8:30 p.m. NBC), “Ugly Betty” (8 p.m. ABC) and “CSI” (8 p.m. CBS -- my affiliate starts primetime an hour early, it’s annoying). I think I’ll watch “Ugly Betty,” record “CSI” and then catch “30 Rock” online. New episodes post at 2 a.m. the next day and since I’m usually (heck, always) still up at that hour, I might as well put my sleep deprivation to good use. Though, after seeing this still from the second season premiere (guest starring Jerry Seinfeld), I’m dying to know why Liz is in, what appears to be, a wedding dress. Dammit, I’m going to have to rethink my Thursday schedule again.

Lovely Leisha

Oh, thank God, it’s Leisha. What a welcome antidote to the Britney Spears train wreck. U.K. lesbian magazine DIVA interviewed the most adorable L Word cast memeber, not to mention the AfterEllen-approved hottest woman on Earth, for its October cover story. The story reads a bit like an interview in Tiger Beat (Who gets the most fan mail? Who is the best kisser? What kind of girls do you go for?), but any time you get to stare at pictures of lovely Leisha like this is reason to celebrate in my book.
My favorite part, she fancies herself a bit of a female Clark Kent. Aww, well, you know I already think she is Supergirl.
Read the whole article here. I could not love her more. For reals.