My What Big Horns You Have

Three words that sound great together: Lesbian. Viking. Saga.

Earlier this summer it was reported that writer-director Catherine Hardwicke (of “Thirteen,” “Lords of Dogtown” and, yes, “Twilight” fame) had signed on to helm “Heathen,” a lesbian viking saga based on the comic series of the same name.

Now I’ve never read the comic, and in fact did not realize they existed. But the more I learn about about its heroine, a Norse warrior woman named Aydis, the more excited I get. Because Aydis has Big Plans. She has been kicked out of her tribe for kissing another woman, and sets out instead to kill The (Norse) Man himself, Odin. Yes, that Odin.

Yes, kittens, it seems all of our Tamsin from “Lost Girl” and Valkyrie from “Thor” fantasy sequences are coming together in one movie and I am Here. For. It. Also, it doesn’t hurt that Catherine Hardwicke (who showed her queer bona fides with “Thirteen”) is a wildly talented and wildly underused director who if she were a man would have one or two of her own signature franshises by now but instead because she is a woman wasn’t even asked to come back and direct the next “Twilight” despite it grossing almost $400 million worldwide. The patriarchy sure does suck. So, go get 'em, Aydis.

Now let’s cast this thing and make all our lesbian viking saga dreams come true.