Carol: The Goth Remake

Would you like to escape our current terrible reality? Of course you would, all feeling, thinking, non-Congressional Republican humans do. Then welcome to my Alternate Universe where the Goddess of Death and the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo are totally dating. The newest trailer for “Thor: Ragnarok” was released recently and Cate Blanchett has only gotten MORE AWESOME as Hela, the Goddess of Death. Can I just say Carol got an upgrade.



But I think what I enjoy the most is imagining the infinite number of parallel universes where Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara are still a couple. In one universe, they’re Carol and Therese. In another they’re Hela and Lisbeth Salander.



I mean, just picture magnificent antlered Hela and her black latex lounging around the house with goth-punk hacker Lisbeth by her side. Don’t lie, you know you’d watch the hell out of “Carol” reimagined as a death metal romance. I sure would.