Sister, can you spare a dime, or $1,500 million?

If by chance you are looking for a sugar mama to come whisk you away to live happily ever after in the manner which you always hoped to become accustomed, do I have a hot tip you for. Forbes released a list of the Top 20 Richest Woman in Entertainment yesterday. Sure, only one out lesbian makes the list (Ellen at No. 17 with $65 million). But don’t let that stop your gold digging. Plenty of ladies on the list could, under the right circumstances, be persuaded. I mean, Oprah’s already “a little gay.” We all know Madonna has played for pretty much every team on the planet. And Cameron is on the rebound now that Justin is no longer bringing the sexyback to her. I say, go for it.

1. Oprah Winfrey = $1,500 million
2. J.K. Rowling = $1,000 million
3. Martha Stewart = $638 million
4. Madonna = $325 million
5. Celine Dion = $250 million
6. Mariah Carey = $225 million
7. Janet Jackson = $150 million
8. Julia Roberts = $140 million
9. Jennifer Lopez = $110 million
10. Jennifer Aniston = $110 million
11. Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen = $100 million
12. Britney Spears = $100 million
13. Judith “Judge Judy” Sheindlin = $95 million
14. Sandra Bullock = $85 million
15. Cameron Diaz = $75 million
16. Gisele Bundchen = $70 million
17. Ellen DeGeneres = $65 million
18. Nicole Kidman = $60 million
19. Christina Aguilera = $60 million
20. Renee Zellweger = $45 million

Can I just say, Judge Judy, who knew?