Tuesday, May 01, 2012

Tank Top Tuesday: Superhero Edition

I like superheroes. I particularly like female superheroes. Sadly, there aren’t too many of them around, particularly on the big screen. Which kind of makes no sense because female superheroes tend to wear skin-tight outfits. And we as a culture love to look at women in skin-tight outfit. So it’s a win-win, really. Of course, the other side is that our culture tends to be scared/dismissive of women with power. And you don’t get much more powerful than a female superhero. So I guess our society’s love of sexy ladies is overridden by its need to subjugate all ladies.* Hm. That was kinda deep for a post featuring a lot of sexy ladies in skin-tight tank tops. My point is, we need more movies with female superheroes. Particulary good ones, because I have sat through too many really bad female superhero movies than I care to acknowledge. And as excited – duh, Joss Whedon and superheroes, of course I’m excited – as I am about “The Avengers” opening this weekend, I’m still bummed that the ladies are fewer and less prominent than the gentlemen. So let’s hear it for the ladies in lycra. Long may they save the world.

*Temporary wording fail. All fixed. Carry on, sisters in spandex.

Scarlett Johansson, Black Widow
Whatever boys, I’m all about Scarlett and her incredible thigh power.

Anna Paquin, Rogue
I kinda miss her as a brunette. But I really miss that white streak.

Jessica Alba, The Invisible Woman
Any movie that casts Jessica Alba and then makes her invisible is missing the point.

Charlize Theron, Aeon Flux
I wish this movie had been better, like a lot.

Halle Berry, Storm and Catwoman
Oh, Halle – you know I love you. But, alas, you’re really not at your best in superhero films.

Cobie Smulders, Agent Maria Hill
I want Cobie and Scarlett to have a lot of screentime together. Because the boy shippers can’t have all the fun at “The Avengers.”

Famke Janssen, Jean Grey/Phoenix
I love her eyebrows. Yes, I realize those aren’t what I should be staring at.

Helen Slater, Supergirl
True story, my dad took me to see Supergirl when I was a kid and afterward on the way out I accidentally hit one of the theater armrests and broke it in half. And my dad said, “Whoa there, looks like I’ve got my own little Supergirl.”

Eartha Kitt, Catwoman
Now that’s how you do Catwoman, Halle.

Which female superheroes are you holding out for – so to speak?


Deanna said...

Linda Carter as Wonder Woman is suspiciously absent. Sadness.

Jamie said...

Lena Headey as Sarah Connor. {I STILL MISS TSCC! dammit!!} *tears* And Lena Headey's voice as Dr Sela Mathers. (in the animated Grimm Fairy Tales series)
"So I guess our society’s love of sexy ladies overrides its need to subjugate all ladies." I feel the opposite about that statement. I feel society's need to subjugate all ladies, overrides its love of sexy ladies. Hence, the lack of representation...

Carmen SanDiego said...

Your dad sounds awesome

the_deuceCuatro said...

I dig your eyebrow comment. That is a 100% underrated feature. See: Jordana Brewster, Ania Bukstien

Faffernella Finkerdink said...

I'm with Deanna on this one...Linda Carter as Wonder Women was like 'butterfly belly' catnip to a mini me watching.Sure when you watch it now it's cheesy as hell and dated but jeez that gal could rock the leather wrist band look and she did a mean hair flick !

Salicia said...

Guess she is technically more of a villain than a hero in that movie, but Jennifer Lawrence's brief tank top work out scene in X-men: first class belong in super hero tank top heaven.

Anonymous said...

fist pic is awful.....bad surgery

Anonymous said...

Forever and always, my beloved Mrs. Emma Peel, the glorious original one played by Diana Rigg. Just being true to my olde school.

Erin O'Riordan said...

For me, it's all about Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy. I loves me some bad girls.

There should be a live-action Harley Quinn, too.

Jody said...

I don't know about the hero part, but Jordana Brewster as Lucy Diamond was definitely super in D.E.B.S.

Anonymous said...

Not happening with these

egghead said...

Which ones are you holding out for?

Mila Jovovich (invented the tank top) and that Tomb Raider woman. Can't remember her name just yet . . . She favors one of her legs. I just rewatched "GIA" the other evening. Wow. Her name slips my mind. ;)

I do like the eyebrow girl. Had never seen her before until you came along, Dot, and showed me.

Unknown said...

So weird, I grew up with Famke Janssen, yes I am that old! But I could never see her as a superhero. I would root for Anna Silk as Bo and Uma Thurman as the Bride..

Cherilla said...

Second on Uma Thurman as the bride! So freakin tough.

susan said...

"I don't know about you, Miss Kitty but I feel soooo much yummier..."

I love Eartha Kitt, but Michelle Pfeiffer as Catwoman?


Miss L said...

hey there. long time lurker, first time commenter (or nearly). it's always nice to come to your blog and read your writing and see your excellently curated galleries of pretty ladies. but i never until today appreciated the full weight of what you do in the universe. i am having the *worst* day today. like, seriously, one of those days you're gonna have nightmares about years from now kinda bad. and pretty much the only thing that is making me even contemplate smiling is turning up here and wandering through aforementioned galleries. thanks so much, seriously. (tl;dr: when all else fails, the snark and the arm porn remain)

Jody said...

Oh god, I love arm porn!

Max (the token bloke) said...

Being an Australian and being Awesome, I saw The Avengers on the 25th of April in IMAX. It was worth the wait. And ScarJo was in 3D which was worth the pretty penny it cost to see it in IMAX.

Uma Thurman in The Avengers as Mrs Peel was yum, tight black leather is always good. And Lucy Lu from Charlie's Angels ^^

sammie said...

they're not really super heroes but the hookers from sin city crosses my mind..

there's a wonderwoman shot with megan fox somewhere.

but definitely, Lara Croft!

McT said...

Being one of two moms to a toddler, I would have to add "Word Girl". As the promo says, she fights crime and enriches vocabulary! I hope they give her human form some day.

On a more traditional note - Lori Petty as Tank Girl!