Tuesday, June 28, 2011

First rule of Fight Club

WARNING: Right, so if you haven’t watched the season premiere of “True Blood” yet, shoo. Get. Go on now. Spoilers are coming up. But if you’ve already watched or have no intention of watching but want to know what I’m talking about anyway, please, let us proceed together.

Right, so how much more do we love Tara now? Or, I should say, Toni. Man, I have to say she was one of the consistenly most annoying characters on “True Blood,” through no fault of her own but the writing’s consistent insistence on making her as the angry, clueless, angry some more victim. And, well, that’s no fun at parties. But now that Tara has effectively rebooted her life as an octagon-ready MMA fighter with a hot MMA fighting girlfriend, I suddenly find her so much more interesting. So much more.

Granted, we’re not really sure where this storyline is going. It’s problematic that Tara’s new identity comes with secrets and lies (Toni? Atlanta? Dead grandma?). And it’s also problematic that Tara seems to have come to whatever section of the gay-lesbian-bisexual sliding scale she is on after a series of really disastrous relationships with men. But, I’m just going to be super shallow and say how consequences-be-damned hot the scenes between Tara/Toni (Rutina Wesley) and Naomi (Vedette Lim) were in Monday’s premiere. What, you’re having trouble remembering? Let me help you with that.

Yes, the lying. Yes, the deception. Yes, the fake name. Yes, I know. I know. Still, so hot. If that’s the last we see of the luscious Naomi this season I will be a very, very, very unhappy camper.

Also, what’s in the water over there on “True Blood.” Right now Sookie and Jessica are practically the only female characters (OK, minus a few Merlotte’s waitresses) who haven’t gotten their lady loving on. To date: Pam (with the Estonian stripper), Queen Sophie-Anne (with Sookie’s cousin Hadley) and Nan from the American Vampire League (with some very topless lady in her limo) and now Tara and her MMA sparring partner? Granted, most of those are vamps – who I think might all be bisexual or pansexual or just plain equal opportunity about their horniness/hunger. But, still, that’s a lot of ladies willing to step up to the bat for our team on one show.

Right, like I was saying: Go Tara/Toni. Get it, girl. Get. It.

9 comments:

Jay said...

Wet dream come true! Yay!

The Erin Grant said...

Told ya! @eringrant

A Real Lesbian said...

Don't put lesbian and bisexual together in any context. I know that you are beholden to the business and to AfterEllen (a site that is Hollywood's proverbial "bitch").

I also know that a lot of impressionable young women, view your site.

Hollywood is male dominated and given the intrinsic insecurity of men, the move is to make "penis" relevant via any means by inferring that receiving dick is inevitable. It's not, and you should quit trying to make it appear that lesbian and penis (bisexual) go "Hand In Dick"

Aren't you a lesbian? I though you were. If you are a lesbian then WTF happened to your lesbian sensibilities?

Anonymous said...

A Real Lesbian. LOL. Oh look, it's the shit stirrer urbansapphic hiding under a pseudonym. Trolling Snarker's blog again as usual to drive traffic to your site?

Anonymous said...

I think we are all just trying to enjoy and share women. Bisexual..Lesbian, who cares..we should be supportive of each other.

Also, Pam is hot. That is all.

Unknown said...

wow, just wow!

Melanie Wagner said...

I might not be a real *lesbian* but I am a real person who *likes girls*!

More importantly -- Tara's new girlfriend is to die for, but all I really want is some more Sophie Anne.

Anonymous said...

thank you so much for the tara and naomi clip, naomi is sooooo hot, can't stop watching it again and again. pls keep them coming!

Big Country Little town said...

to " a real lesbian"- I have to say i LOVE it when women bash men and then accuse men of being insecure. AM i the only one that finds its strangely hypocritical to use shaming techniques and then belittle men for feeling shame?
Aren't women, and lesbians in particular supposed to be more aware of and evolved regarding stereotyping?

Guess not.