Monday, February 28, 2011

SGALGG: Lesbian Oscars Edition

God, did you make it through all 127 hours of the Oscars telecast? Did anyone find James Franco’s personality? Or, better yet, could he have just shared whatever he was smoking with all of us. That way it would have been a much more enjoyable experience for all parties involved. Though, despite the show falling in its desperate attempt to be young and breaking its hipness, there were still some quality Straight Gals Acting Like Gay Gals moments. I mean, the show’s one conscious host Anne Hathaway herself called it “a great year for lesbians.”

Michelle Willliams & Busy PhillipsBusy was Michele’s date for the Oscars, and they even arrived holding hands. Someone needs to give them a portmanteau tout de suite.

Gwyneth Paltrow & Cameron DiazI can’t tell if I’m more excited by the SGALGGy hug or the arm porn. Probably both.

Sandra Bullock & Halle BerryI will pay good money to whoever has the next photo in this sequence. Kiss her you fool!

Marisa Tomei & Melissa LeoMarisa looks like she’s about to jump into Melissa’s arms. And then, in my head, they do the dramatic lift from “Dirty Dancing.”

Selena Gomez & Taylor SwiftWhile the Bieber kid looks more lesbian, Selena and Taylor make a cuter couple.

Leslie Mann, Emma Stone & Jennifer WestfeldtThe best thing about this picture is how badly Judd Apatow wants to make this a foursome and how defiantly the ladies are keeping it a threesome.

Rosario Dawson & Jennifer HudsonWhat I would not give to hear a “Take Me or Leave Me” duet between those two.

Reese Witherspoon & Elizabeth BanksI’m assuming Reese just said something absolutely filthy about what she was going to do with that finger and Elizabeth approves.

Anne HathawayIf only Anne had hosted with herself and her tuxedoed self, instead of James Franco. It would have been so much more entertaining, and hot.

Lea Michele & Dianna AgronI particularly love how they both look like they’ve been caught in the act. Busted, Achele, busted.

GGALGG Bonus: Lora Hirschberg & her wife LauraOut lesbian sound mixer Lora Hirschberg won for Inception and got a smooch on her way to the stage.

OK, Anne Hathaway, you were right. It was a great year for lesbians, or at least lesbian behavior.

p.s. Check out my full Oscar recap over at AfterEllen.

18 comments:

sonja said...

Wow, Cameron Diaz has great arms. How have I never noticed this before? And I sat all the way through Knight & Day.

Lauryn said...

Too bad about the lack of Nat and Mila togetherness. My night was ruined.

Kathryn said...

I looked forward to this all morning! Thanks, Dorothy.

cocoro said...

really real name is busy?

not nickname?

thanks for the posting!

nice day~

Anonymous said...

ACHELE. They live.

tlsintx said...

Michelle Williams is an ephemeral beauty...just gorgeous. (I used ephemeral right, right?)

And Busy is so darling..i hope they're really a couple! :)

Anonymous said...

Sandra Bullock looked really hot!! She's making a habit of kissing gorgeous women first Meryl now Halle!

Solo said...

Sandra Bullock & Halle Berry... i didnt see this coming....nd damn how much im enjoying my dirty mind right at this moment :)))
and once I saw how Lora Hirschberg was going up the stage I was on google to find out if she is gay...was right :)))

Laura said...

Sneaky Achele, the gift that keeps on giving.

Amanda said...

All my friends thought Franco was stoned too, you know, to appeal to a younger audience. haha

Amanda

Anonymous said...

Must stop reading your captions/column while eating. Far too dangerous! :o)

Norma Desmond said...

Love it. From what I hear, this was a good year to miss the Oscars, so, instead, I will definitely settle for your recap. That said, can I please be the next one Sandra Bullock kisses on camera? PLEASE?

Oh, also, You've got a Marisa/Melissa mistype in your caption.

Anonymous said...

I don't think Lea and/or Dianna fit into the SGALGG.

No, I'm not an Achele fan, but Dianna just doesn't seem straight at all (from interviews/her tumblr).

And I've been a Lea fan since her SA/Broadway days. WE know ;)

dc said...

Your comments made it worthwhile slogging through the Oscars :)

Yeah, about Franco! He was way out of line. He could have said no to hosting, for heaven's sake. Nobody held a gun to his head.

Gwyneth's singing was definitely a low moment...a VERY LONG low moment. Have standards for singing gone downhill when I wasn't watching?!@#$%

Kait B. Roe said...

Ok, I give up. What does SGALGG stand for?

Anonymous said...

A quick search reveals this: Straight Gals Acting Like Gay Gals

Anonymous said...

"could he have just shared whatever he was smoking with all of us."Great...
so boring ceremony
Sandra Bullock-Botox needs to come out really,now..
And the award for Portman is weird for me, after seing
the unbelievable acting of Jennifer Lawrence in Winter
Bones....

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