Monday, January 11, 2010

Fuck it

Do not let those motherfuckers fool you; sometimes you need to swear. That’s right, goddammit, I’m talking about cursing. It’s natural, necessary even. I’ve always thought that purposely exchanging perfectly good profanity with sanitized substitutes in the company of other adults is kind of, well, bullshit. Around kids? Keep it clean. At work? Probably not appropriate. But otherwise, shit yeah. Piss off, puritans. Granted, there are words I don’t use. Hurtful, hateful words. Sexist, sadistic language. No thanks. But there is something so satisfying, so supremely expressive about just saying fuck when you really mean it. And on a day like today when the full reality of being back to work (that first week after a vacation is a blur of catching up and settling back) and the long, cold, gray slog ahead before the next break becomes all too apparent, you’d better believe I mean it. In substitute, please enjoy Portia de Rossi and the rest of “Better Off Ted” really meaning it, too. Mondays, they can fucking suck it.

[Clearly, language is NSFW so, headphones.]

And, just in case you didn’t watch the two-hour premiere of “Chuck” last night, here is one more reason to swear. I know. Fuck.

That, my friends, is the 1:14 mark of last night’s episode. So you won’t miss anything equally juicy, be sure to tune in tonight for a new episode as the show settles into its regular timeslot of 8 p.m. Mondays on NBC. Right about now a fuck yeah would be in order.

21 comments:

Laura said...

from which episode of 'better off ted'is that clip?! have i missed one??? (please tell me i didn't miss one!!!)

Kate said...

That clip was full of awesome, but Frosty the Snow Whore was by far my favorite, and one that I will actually use at work. Probably later today, in fact.

I don't watch Chuck but I sure to enjoy when you post screen caps of Sarah Walker. I saw a lot of tweeting about a white bikini last night. Will there be a cap of that in the future? Maybe? Please?

tlsintx said...

Now THAT'S how to start a Monday. Fuckin. A.

Shannon said...

The "Better off Ted" clip was not from any actual aired episode... after all unless it were on cable, no network TV station could get away with airing that (at least not without a lots of bleeps).

I think it was a compilation of outtakes put together and released... it might even be on the DVD as an extra (but don't hold me to that).

Anyway, I saw this the other day and was LOL IRL! "Better off Ted" is one of the best comedies airing on network TV right now, IMHO.

WannabeVirginia W. said...

Frosty the Snow Whore! I must include that in my vocabulary.

jennifer from pittsburgh said...

"You perfectly tanned shit bird..." I love it! I'm writing that one down in my notebook to call my sister the next time she goes to the tanning salon.
Sometimes life is sweet :)

Summer Waldron said...

Brilliant! I love swearing, it's very theraputic. If you like creative swearing I HIGHLY recommend seeing "In the Loop" and watcing the series it's based on, "The Thick of It". Brilliant brilliant brilliant. "He's as about as useful as a marzipan dildo!"

Norma Desmond said...

Oh, Sarah Walker, I did miss you so...

Your friend, Rusty said...

You are one of my favorite motherfrakkin bloggers.

linster said...

So much to memorize on a Monday morning!

Karin said...

Loved the bikini scene with Sarah coming out of the pool. Watched the lingerie scene 4 times. Yes, I said 4. And actually I think the hottest thing was Carina putting the knife in the sole of her heel. So hot.

Anonymous said...

Fucking "A"

folkpants said...

You've made my fucking day!
Thank you.

medyani said...

May I suggest for your swearing pleasure: http://www.bu.edu/today/node/10083

RizzRustbolt said...

And that, my friends, is how you save a show that is on the edge of cancellation.

Fuckin' cussin'.

Making Space said...

Yes. Fuck. An excellent word for the day. Thank you.

not only but also said...

Dorothy! You don't use sexist language??! What the heck do you think "motherfucker" is? Of all the swear words I use (and trust me, I use many, regularly), that's the one I avoid because of its mysoginistic associations. Please, lose it from your otherwise delightful vocabulary.

Lisa said...

That was a much more jubilant fuckfest than my Monday, breaking up with my girlfriend. But it made me feel better, so thanks.

Bionic Pocahontas said...

Perfectly tanned shit bird.

Love it

Anonymous said...

You know what, some of the most influential and wealthy people i have had associations with in my life , live and die by the word fuck. None of our business would get done with emphasizing the word fuck to accentuate how important our million dollar deals will go. Real work cannot get done without this absolutely essential tool.

Generic Viagra said...

I think that there are moments where we have to express our ideas, I don't see anything wrong saying it I mean the word Fuck.