Friday, July 31, 2009
Of course, Laurel is more than just Tina. She first stole my heart – as I’m sure she did yours – as the adorable Randy Dean. She was the scruffy little butch we all wish we met in high school, or aspired to be. In “The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love,” Laurel was awkward yet determined, goofy yet heroic. Anytime I want a guaranteed giggle, I cue the film up to Randy reading “Leaves of Grass” and replay her delightfully adolescent repeating of the word “crotch.” She so inhabited that role that years later when I encounter her again on my TV, this time in “Angel,” I almost didn’t recognize her.
So then, when we met again in that show about the letter between K and M, I didn’t know what to expect. What we got was strength, smarts, sweetness and, sure, sometimes a neck-bulging screamfest. It’s not easy being the quiet one. But it’s the quiet ones who always surprise you. Happy weekend, all.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
So, we all already knew that girls' sports were awesome. But now, according to the New York Times, girls' sports are actually lucrative. Suck it, Major League. Though, in all seriousness, anyone who has ever been to a girls' or women's sporting event can tell you that the heart these competitors play with is equal, if not greater than, any competitor in men's sports. This is because, for the most part, they aren't playing for glory or future fame or big shoe endorsements. They're playing for the unadulterated, uncomplicated, uncompromised love of the game. So, yeah, girls' sports are awesome. And the women these girl athletes grow into, sweet holy hell, they're hot.
Detroit ShockI'd better see him wear this during one of his pick-up games.
Serena WilliamsThose arms make me want to be a better woman.
Jelena JankovicThese too.
Natasha KaiWanna see ‘Tasha get a tattoo? Course you do.
Blanca VlasicOh my, the bendy.
Lolo JonesI think she might possibly be perfect, tiny trip and all.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
So what it is about “Glee” that hits my happy place? (No, not that happy place. That’s the “Spartacus: Blood and Sand” trailer) It’s clearly not just the singing. If that was the case I’d be watching
Fox has released a new clip, and it is fan-fucking-tastic. In it, Mercedes (the divatastic Amber Riley) covers Jazmine Sullivan’s “Bust Your Windows” and reveals a doomed love for the club’s resident gay boy, Kurt (Chris Colfer). Cock your shoulder and flex your attitude. Then press play. [If YouTube pulls this non-geoblocked clip, I’ll repost the official Hulu version.]
Besides just kicking all around ass (also, hello bikini-clad cheerleader backup dancers), this clip tells us that not all the numbers in the “Glee” universe will be relegated to the club’s performances. Neat! If any show can make breaking into spontaneous song smoking instead of silly, it’s this one. I replayed that clip three times in a row and it improved my mood tenfold.
So, are you ready? OK! Give me a “G!” Give me a “L!” Give me an “E!” Give me another “E!” What’s that spell? Hell fucking yeah, that’s what it spells.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
First, her mea culpa:
“I made a foolish mistake saying didn’t care what viewers wanted in the stories. Learned a lot from engaging with community.”
And all the lesbians in the room say, “DUH!”
Then, her humdinger:
“When we make ‘The L Word’ movie, we will say who killed Jenny. Movie is in scripting process.”
When. Not if. WHEN. Seems that was her plan all along – string ’em along to get a
spinoff movie made. I knew it, I fucking knew it. Of course, this strategy comes with a very real risk. When she finally decides to tell us who killed Jenny, will we still care?
Do I care who killed Jenny at this point? Not really. I mean, it’s just not one of those great, haunting unanswered cinematic questions. Like, what did Bill Murray say to Scarlett Johansson at the end of “Lost in Translation?” What was in that briefcase in “Pulp Fiction?” Or, seriously, what the fuck was that all about, “Mulholland Dr.?”
But will I still go see the movie? Who am I kidding, I’m totally going. The siren song of Jennifer Beals’ ass in a perfectly-tailored power suit is just too strong. If I can make it through six sanity-sapping seasons, I can certainly make it through two hours of whatever crazy Chaiken can throws up there now. Plus, I own a flask. Two even.
I guess what irks me most is even though Ilene says she is sorry for being all “Ney-ner, ney-ner, it’s my show so suck it!” about the storylines, I still feel manipulated. Artists don’t have to justify their art. She doesn’t owe us anything, but she owes her stories everything. She owes them truth and consistency. And all too often that’s just not what they received.
Look, I will forever be grateful to Ilene for creating this amazing universe and bringing together even more amazing women to inhabit it. But such is the great conundrum for GLBT viewers everywhere. We are unquestionably grateful and thrilled when any artist chooses to tell our stories. But that doesn’t mean, sometimes, we can’t wish those stories were better. Or made sense. Or didn’t make you want to throw any and all heavy objects within arm’s reach at your television.
Though I guess the one good thing about a movie version is that no matter what happens, we’ll at least get a nice big tub of popcorn out of the whole experience. So, are you in? And, most important, butter or no butter?
Friday, July 24, 2009
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Gosh, that does feel better.
Oh to have her look at me like that, just once.
Agent Sarah Walker
More like Agent Sarah Crawler!
Inappropriate workplace thoughts in 5, 4, 3, 2…
The adorkability, it burns!
Ahhh, much better. Something about watching hot, smart, funny, hot women over and over and over and over and over. What? I’m sorry, was I talking? I think I got a little hypnotized there for a second. It’s just something about watching hot, smart, funny, hot women over and over and over and over…
Note: I know the cutehotadorablehotfunnyhot is irresistible, but if you want to share please save and upload instead of hotlink. Thanks.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Well, they sure weren’t making it hard on our gaydar this season. I think I could have spotted them blindfolded from 30,000 feet. Faux hawks, copious tattoos, bed head. It’s all there.
But, interestingly, the lesbians aren’t the most extreme ink bearers this season. No, that distinction lies with two apparently straight contestants: Philly-based chef Jennifer Zavala [left] and Baltimore-based chef Jesse Sandlin [right]. A full-on neck tattoo and dramatic décolletage decoration? Whoa.
Rounding out Team Rainbow on the fella’s side is Ash Fulk, a 29-year-old New York-based chef. The tie is, apparently, the giveaway there.
But, I rather thought these two guys might be covert Team Rainbow members. A jaunty scarf and a bear beard? Puh-lease.
The scarf dude is French so, well, that explains that. Chef Bear still has some explaining to do.
The rest of the ladies, ranked in order of gayness [starting top left]: Robin Leventhal, Laurine Wickett, Eve Aronoff and Jennifer Carroll:
Now my other big take-away from the new Sin City edition was this little nugget from the press release:
Some of the top names in food, movies and entertainment including Wolfgang Puck, Todd English, Natalie Portman, Daniel Boulud, Penn & Teller, Hubert Keller, Laurent Tourondel, Tim Love, Michelle Bernstein, Tyler Florence, Charlie Palmer, Paul Bartolotta, Nigella Lawson, Jerome Bocuse and Thomas Keller.
Dear whatever deity you believe or don’t believe in wherever he or she or nothing may reside, Padma Lakshmi and Nigella Lawson are going to be in the same room eating food and, if history is any indication, licking it off their fingers/spoons/whatever other lucky inanimate object may be nearby. That thud you heard was me passing out.
Natalie and Padma in the same room is all kinds of awesome, too. But I’ve never looked at Natalie and thought, “Now there’s a big eater.” Nigella, on the other hand, wrote the book on food porn. “Top Chef: Las Vegas” premieres Aug. 19 on Bravo. I’ll be there, bib at the ready.
p.s. Did you know Padma is working on her own sitcom? No, I’m not kidding. No, really, I’m not kidding. Check the date. It’s not even close to April 1.